Re: Intellectual Intercourse
have you ever heard the term ’ silence talks ’ 
Re: Intellectual Intercourse
yes, intellectual compatibility is the mostest importantest.
i often feel like you at such dinners 
Re: Intellectual Intercourse
^ you mean.......... the Coke ka Tin looks at you like that??
Re: Intellectual Intercourse
you mean, coke ka can 
Re: Intellectual Intercourse
Silence can either speak a language that only the two who share it understand, or it can be suffocating - it all depends on who you share that silence with.
Re: Intellectual Intercourse
so how many intercourses are required before one can judge someone and make up their mind about moving forward??
Re: Intellectual Intercourse
Nietzsche says marriage is one long conversation.
Saturday night. I arrive at a swanky new Italian joint to meet friends for dinner. One of them is an 'eligible candidate' which my sadistic buddies have conspired to throw in my direction, unbeknownst to me.
As the evening progresses, our riveting 'conversation' makes me want to stick a fork in my left eye. Repeatedly. Dazed, my gaze eventually drifts over to the adjacent table. There's a fairly good looking guy quietly eying his fork (guess what he's thinking) while his girlfriend continues to gesticulate at him like a runaway train. He shifts in his seat, glances up and looks at me. Our eyes exchange a silent acknowledgement of common misery. The resignation in his resembles a caged animal's. At least I was single and free to run. He was going home with that verbal juggernaut.
"When entering a marriage, one should ask the question: do you think you will be able to have good conversations with this person right into old age? Everything else in marriage is transitory, but most of the time is spent in conversation." - Nietzsche's 'Human, all too human.']
Discuss.
Well my friend good topic if discussion. As i understand it, intellectual intercourse happens. And one the example would be lets say in a club. Starts from intellectual intercourse by looking at each other..smile..so on and on.. to real one. So ya! it does happen. Now, when you are married...i think we men have it all the time with other women. This is natural. If men are from mulla brigate then sure he might not be indulging into it.
Re: Intellectual Intercourse
I dont agree, most important thing in marriage is functionality between the spouses, there are plenty of other people to have conversation with. But if two people cannot work together like a family, intelectual farting wont do the trick
Re: Intellectual Intercourse
What I was tring to say was - just as high portion of body is water (though we may not realize it), so is a high portion of one's marriage in the long run intellectual discourse, though as young people one may not realize it.
I disagree. I think it is the young who focus more on "let's talk" and "we must have a conversation" and "how do you feel".
The older, mature, wiser love appreciates and understands irregardless of the amount of words exchanged.
Re: Intellectual Intercourse
Intellectual intercourse is not the most important factor in marriage - it was for Nietzsche himself and there is a reason for that ...
For people the most important factor is to share the same "values and principles" - since Nietzsche treated good and evil in an arbitary fashion it meant his most "valued" position was the ability to "argue one's point" - this is the ability to "have an intellectual intercourse" ...
For many people spouses are not always on level pegging intellectually with their other halves - but for sure they need to share an appreciation for each other's set of values and principles and attempt to share with them their own.
Re: Intellectual Intercourse
I dont agree, most important thing in marriage is functionality between the spouses, there are plenty of other people to have conversation with. But if two people cannot work together like a family, intelectual farting wont do the trick
I'm inclined to agree with this. While I think mental compatibility is important, I don't think it's a reason to divorce or separate..... it's one of the things that can be found outside of a marriage without threatening it...if that makes any sense... it's not like having financial/familial/even sexual issues with your partner.
Re: Intellectual Intercourse
the thing i can use freely without any restrictation in any direction is my mind.
so if i cant use my mind with my partner , there would not be any freedom in my relatioship
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Intellectual conversation seems to matter most to intellectuals themselves. Smart and intellectual aren't really synonymous as intellects have a more complex mental capacity almost to*need *to be able to converse on more than just sub-par topics. Some couples don't feel the need to discuss the honor suicide of japanese samurais or analyze the movie fight club because that is not where their interest lies and as long as it's mutual everyone's shiny and happy.
Re: Intellectual Intercourse
Btw are u asking abt intercourse or discourse?
**in·ter·course **Sexual intercourse.
Let me guess, the VISUALLY JARRING RED was an allusion to Hell Fire. I have seen the light, Mother Mary.
Since you've run out of bullets, let me put you out of your misery :
Intercourse : 1. connection or dealings between persons or groups 2. exchange especially of thoughts or feelings.
Source : Merriam Webster.
Ah, but you went out of your way to pick definition 3, because let's face it, everybody loves to talk about SEX! No shame in that.
Knock yourselves out, horndogs.
Re: Intellectual Intercourse
I'd like to know exactly what is mental compatibility?
From my understanding it includes (among other things) spirited conversations that do NOT revolve around kids/household chores/family issues...
what else?
Re: Intellectual Intercourse
Can we pay attention to his non anti God views ? Man had some good things to say too. Being anti God does not discredit his life's work , does it ?
Atheists are like lepers on this forum. No one wants to touch them.
His personal angst and inability to incorporate intimacy in his own life aside, his treatment of marriage as friendship suggested the importance he placed on it as a relationship, rather than just a social institution.
Re: Intellectual Intercourse
@sara - mental compatibility, IMO does not mean both partners should be experts in a particular field. For me, it means some of the following:
treat each other as equal - no one is the boss or both or bosses
As someone said earlier, be comfortable - both in silence and in conversation
Be willing to learn about each other's interests (rather than lead parallel lives that barely intersect (no pun intended)
And get the heck out of the way if Cricket is on
Re: Intellectual Intercourse
I think that's very true. In high school I was mostly fixated on looks. Now, I find that even if a girl is attractive, if I'm not compatible with her intellectually then there is no way I could spend a significant amount of time with her.
And by compatibility I don't just mean IQ but interest in similar subject matter as well. I know plenty of smart people who have no interest in discussion about topics outside of pop culture.
Good point. We usually measure intelligence with IQ and aptitude tests. You can be intelligent but dull. You can be intelligent but lack curiosity. You can be intelligent but disinterested in a higher purpose. You can be intelligent and be apathetic to the world outside the 10 mile radius that sums up your meaningless existence. Take Mr. Eligible - he was intelligent on paper, generally well-spoken, good looking for desiman standards, but 30 mins in you realize an Oxbridge education doesn't always translate into a sexy mind. Social intelligence is another factor - knowing when to stop talking so the girl can get a word in, not using every silent pause to conduct a rapid-fire interview, not making her uncomfortable by staring intently. It was a lovely evening otherwise. :D
Re: Intellectual Intercourse
Nietzsche says marriage is one long conversation.
Saturday night. I arrive at a swanky new Italian joint to meet friends for dinner. One of them is an 'eligible candidate' which my sadistic buddies have conspired to throw in my direction, unbeknownst to me.
As the evening progresses, our riveting 'conversation' makes me want to stick a fork in my left eye. Repeatedly. Dazed, my gaze eventually drifts over to the adjacent table. There's a fairly good looking guy quietly eying his fork (guess what he's thinking) while his girlfriend continues to gesticulate at him like a runaway train. He shifts in his seat, glances up and looks at me. Our eyes exchange a silent acknowledgement of common misery. The resignation in his resembles a caged animal's. At least I was single and free to run. He was going home with that verbal juggernaut.
"When entering a marriage, one should ask the question: do you think you will be able to have good conversations with this person right into old age? Everything else in marriage is transitory, but most of the time is spent in conversation." - Nietzsche's 'Human, all too human.']
Discuss.
Okay we get it. You've read Nietzsche
Re: Intellectual Intercourse
I recently met a guy that would kinda fall into this description…he was a looker, good provider, educated, etc.
I think what happens is if there is no meeting of the minds…attraction fades. He was cute when I first met him and then he just turned…yucky. I felt like I was hearing “neah ne neah ne neah ne neah”…