Well I am not in the same league as your indian friend. I dont believe everybody in Pakistan carry guns and other things you mentioned. But I believe that the Pakistan that is modern is being squeezed out in the decision making. Their numbers are coming down and talibanisation ( due to bad policies of your own govt and military) is taking place in large areas of your land.
Read what your president says.
BBC NEWS | South Asia | Pakistan ‘in fight for survival’
I will not deny that many of us had pre-preconceived notion about Pakistan. But your people or the govt are doing nothing to ally those fears. Pakistani military needs to have India as its enemy to justify its funding and establish its grip over power centers in Pakistan.