There are many issues that cross a person’s mind when thinking of past relationships and the saying that one lie casts a thousand doubts is so extremely true! At times, one finds himself/herself thinking “hmmm…wait a minute, what was it that she/he had said which didn’t really seem to add up” or that was odd but oh well, maybe it’s just chance, and you find yourself giving that person too much of a benefit of a doubt. People who finally admit to themselves that this is nothing but a game for the other person and move on rather quickly seem to be lucky to not get thrown deeper into the lion’s den.
Do any of you find yourselves in that situation but wisen up soon enough and get out when the timing’s right?
I know I’m going to get bashed for posting this especially by the GS men!) but the heck with it.
You know sweets...I've been in MANY bad friendships...knowing full well that the person is gonna wipe their feet on me...but I stick around...for the simple reason that I knwo if I don't help this person out..they'll drown...and I belive that we're all responsible for each other in some way...
So I love and help without expecting in return...guess that's why God blessed me with a real good man..who loves me...even though he can't be with me :)
OMG finally someone who COMPLETELY understands me!
This is exactly 100% the way I am and each darned time I end up being taken advantage of by men who promise the moon and stars. They reel you in with self-pity and selfishness but once they’ve used your emotions to become strong again (lying and cheating their way in the process), it’s bye-bye to you. That is why I have asked God to no longer be mad at me if I don’t bother “helping” out “tortured souls.” It is so not worth the effort. All these folks do is try to drag you down along with them to a state of no return. I am seeing someone right now but I don’t try to see myself 50 years down the line with him just yet! Let him win my heart over and then we’ll see. I think this is the best way to go for me at this point.
Sweets..I've only ever loved ONE man and he's a darling...the rest are friends..male or female...doesn't matter...but when you build a bond of love or trust with someone..I don't understand how they don't realise how much it hurts when they abuse your friendship..
Well, the thread is pretty general. I'm not directing it at any one person. It's just men in general and the combined experiences of women who experience this sort of a thing. A bit of an observation is all.
Well said and waqas, I have certainly learned my lesson, trust me on that! I’m looking to get married and men play these games to disillusion you by promising that they’ll eventually marry you one day, etc. However, the irony of it all is, by the time they actually are able to get married (for certain reasons), your instincts tell you full well to stay the hell away from such complete and utter losers of the earth. Being in my late 20s, I am naturally looking for marriage and so the other game these men play is stringing you along selfishly with no intentions at all of marriage, just to fool around and have some fun with a pretty girl. You tend to pick up on clues here and there as to what the real deal is and sometimes you play the same game back…if you’re smart. Also, some men have no notion of breaking up the relationship in a mature, civilized manner. They hurl all sort of degrading remarks and threats while the entire time, you’re laughing at this utter childishness.
Eventually though (hopefully soon enough) you forget them and move on to bigger and better as is well-deserved.
what i dont seem to understand is why this pretty girl in her late 20's has not even found one good guy..i just wonder how long a pakistani girl can wait
you're joking, right?! Most of the muslim/desi guys I've come across are friggin idiots!?
I don't want to talk to them and I can see why any girl would not want to either?!
Maybe she's actually got some sense in that head of hers. Rather then follow typical desi stupidity she knows a looser when she sees one and would rather be alone then with an idiot!?
[QUOTE]
*Originally posted by waqas72: *
you're joking, right?! Most of the muslim/desi guys I've come across are friggin idiots!?
I don't want to talk to them and I can see why any girl would not want to either?!
Maybe she's actually got some sense in that head of hers. Rather then follow typical desi stupidity she knows a looser when she sees one and would rather be alone then with an idiot!?
lol
[/QUOTE]
you said most and not all..there are still some good guys out there but unfortunately the good ones are usually taken by the good girls :)
*It's almost a fatal hazard to be vulnerable
these days because when it has happened once it'll happen
over and over again. There are people out there whose sole
purpose is to thrive on someone else's emotional or physical
susceptibility at the expense of inflicting pain upon them. I'm
sure people of both genders can relate to your outcry. However, sometimes a person has to really ask themselves the question
of how much of what they receive they put themselves into
knowingly (on a subconscious level) and draw the line there. *
^True, but when the person recognizes certain key elements relating to the other, they need to move on right away and look back on it as a lesson learned.
Aalhan:
That’s why I said draw the line there
implying avoiding falling prey to such feeding-on-vulnerability
hawks.
sweetpie :True, but when the person recognizes certain key elements relating to the other, they need to move on right away and look back on it as a lesson learned.
Ah!I never learn I wish I can be as strong as you are sweetpie…
[QUOTE]
*Originally posted by Minerva: *
sweetpie :True, but when the person recognizes certain key elements relating to the other, they need to move on right away and look back on it as a lesson learned.
[/QUOTE]
sweetpie i see girls who let their florence nighingale and mother teresa asects take over to help these constantly needy souls who whimper and cry and are constantly on a rebound..what else do you expect from guys like that.
I mean its simple, be careful who you get close to
be confident and strong enough to walk away if things are not right
and
use the lessons learnt from that in the evaluation fo other ppl.
rushing headfirst into any relationship with heart as the only decision maker can get you in a right connection by chance, but by the sheer randomness ofthat actionl the likelihood that it is not going to pan out is higher.
I dont think i have been in many situations where i have had to give someone the nenefit of the doubt cuz the things someone said dinn add up, however there were cases where there were differences of opinion about lifestyle which we could nto agree upon, or things someone said that she will be flexible about but later was not and those were deal breakers. I walked away.
Stay strong, sista!
I wish I can be as strong as you are sweetpie…