Re: In love with one marrying another....
i would have thought american paki girls have more of a choice, cus if they try to force me ill just threaten them about running away n never talking to them again, which would work if im in college. but then again i still need them to pay for it. but still.
Re: In love with one marrying another…
I am not saying who has more of a choice. I was just saying depending on the family the girl has a choice to say yes or no. Curiously would your parents give you a choice?
Re: In love with one marrying another…
Running away is not the ideal way to handle things. It will just make u look bad when you come back home cuz u know u will have to come back home.
Re: In love with one marrying another....
Well you said paki girls usualy have more of a choice and i wondered why...
of course my parents wud let me choose...they wud never force a guy on me...
Re: In love with one marrying another…
Re: In love with one marrying another....
Believe in what you love the most. I follow this simple rule. I love another person and she loves me back as much as i do, then I should be able to convience my parents for my marriage. I am sure all of our parents want to secure us and make sure that we don't make a decision that will haunt us later on but serisously, how do they know that the person they have chosen for us will be compatible with us?
I am in the same situation.. have someone in mind and i am trying to persue my parents to agree to it. They have thrown all sorts arguements, from age to "you don't have a job" .. i waited and fullfilled all of their demands, except that i still have 1 more semester to finish before i get my degree but I already have a job fulltime in my very own field and with a very decent startup salary.. now their excuse is "wait till ur big bro gets settled.." and then i knw they will say .. "we think that so and so from our own family will be better, coz we know her" I will still fight for what i want and keep this fight UNDER the circle of respect for my parents
InshaAllah, it will happen.. I have full faith in Allah(swt) .. HE has HIS own ways of getting things done :)
Re: In love with one marrying another…
u r right every one has different perspective. 
Re: In love with one marrying another....
Mr. Bombastic, please watch your language and learn to talk to others with respect.
Re: In love with one marrying another…
there u goooo .. just made urself look stupid already . so wait leme coherent it a lil further .. the only thing differs us is U GOT STUCK WITH ONE n instead i LIKE TO KNOW MORE PPL .. u got SERIOUS n all with that guy PRE TEEN LOVE n i just take it as for FUN . so, was all taht clamor/beef for this ??? n if u wana take it down to religious point then i m as UNRELIGIOUS as u are or anybody else on this forum. so ill sujjust u again … if u make any intentions to open ur mouth/Anus . DO THINK !!!
p.s: my intentions were never to come down n start fuzzing on ppl but cant help defending myself. my opologies!
Re: In love with one marrying another…
Excuse me? I didn’t get stuck with him, it was OUR choice to be with each other. And pulease don’t even compare my story to yours. You obviously have a very different definition of love than I do. You think love is checking out girls and getting to know more people. For me, love is very strong, and people like you will never understand that. You would be lucky if you ever did. Unfortunately, with your attitude, you will never learn what LOVE really is.
Re: In love with one marrying another…
lol ur HILARIOUS indeed … now you is xplaining LOVE to me … how pathetic can it get ??? n yea ive heard it like BILLION times already ** YOU CANT LOVE ANYBODY ** but the truth is i dont have any intentions/charm either lol … its only for despo pervs like u .. so yea plz SPARE ME lol
love is strong .. love is lyfe … no one can understand … my dad wont leme marry that guy/gul … life without her/him … lol man i m SICK of thez 70z dialogues … comon GIVE IT A REST !!! lol
Re: In love with one marrying another…
calm down killer — u got her good!!! impressive!!! (u do know i’m being sarcastic, don’t u?)
Re: In love with one marrying another…
** STAND UP N CHEEEEEEERS FOR THE NEW PLAYA IN ** 
Re: In love with one marrying another…
Tsk tsk tsk poor kid! It will take another 20 years for you to learn that. By now, everyone knows you are mentally challenged (hey don’t look at me.. you proved it) 
Re: In love with one marrying another....
Synonyms: love, affection, devotion, fondness, infatuation
These nouns denote feelings of warm personal attachment or strong attraction to another person. Love is the most intense: marrying for love. Affection is a less ardent and more unvarying feeling of tender regard: parental affection. Devotion is earnest, affectionate dedication and implies selflessness: teachers admired for their devotion to children. Fondness is strong liking or affection: a fondness for small animals. Infatuation is foolish or extravagant attraction, often of short duration: lovers blinded to their differences by their mutual infatuation.
I don't know if the person involved in a relationship can tell they're infatuated (if they are), I think people around them can sense it. For example, if the guy/girl only thinks about the positive aspects of their partner and doesn't want to admit the negative aspects to themselves or if they don't want to hear anything negative about their partner from anyone before getting engaged even though that is the only time that people are allowed to backbite - if someone asks them about someone they are interested in marrying - and tell them honestly about the person's character, etc.; if they feel they can't live without their partner even though realistically, you can very well live without that person; etc. These are just examples but I would say basically anything extreme that doesn't focus on
the realities of life and it's very subjective. Love, on the other hand, is more objective and accepting of the realities.
I know so many people who confused their infatuation with their partner with love and the guys and girls would fight with their parents and either convince them or elope, etc. Most of them ended up getting divorced very quickly or regretted getting married to that person once they were married because it was only after the marriage that they realized how their partner truly was and all the negative stuff they had heard from people prior to their marriage and they had refused to accept was correct. These stories are really sad but we should take these examples to make sure we don't make the same mistakes. This post is not meant to point fingers towards anyone, it's just meant to be a reminder that these things do happen and we should try to analyze our relationships objectively before we get married.
Re: In love with one marrying another....
Love is wanting the absolute best for someone, even if that means not being with them. It is about believing the best in them. It is placing their happiness above your own. It is about sometimes giving when you are too tired and have had a long day. It is sometimes receiving when you need it. It is about quietly cheering them on and picking them up as they go through life's obstacle course. It is friendship and sexual attraction mixed together. It is unselfish caring and concern for the other person.
Real, honest, deep down, soul to soul love takes time and most people are in love with the concept of 'being in love' than the real thing itself. I mean, when you're seeing someone you only see each other for a few hours a day - dressing up nice for them, going out to nice places and treating each other nice makes you feel wonderful but these are superficial and only masks the real person which you will only see if you spent time together 24/7 or see their habits with friends, at home or at work. Only then can you develop feelings for the person within them. But many folks fall into this materialistic trap confusing it for love.
Re: In love with one marrying another....
Mr B: Stop flooding my thread and bashing other ppl. Everyone has their own definition of love.
Larki and Starsky: I really like the way you defined that. Very well said. And the two are very much confused.
Re: In love with one marrying another....
It's very easy to fall in love so to speak. Going through with it, is whole different deal and it is here where most of our desi boys and girls falter. Very rarely does the girl or guy have the guts to stand up to family pressure and such puppy love is usually nipped in the bud. It is sad though, because it's not fair to the person you end up marrying nor is it fair to the person your "love" ends up marrying.
Therefore, if you don't have the stomach for it, it's highly recommended that you be an acha bacha/achi bachi and leave your love life to ammi abbu :)
Re: In love with one marrying another…
Sorry 
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