In Defense of non-Hijabi sisters

this is a very good article…i know its long but hey, i read all of it

http://www3.pak.org/gupshup/smilies/biggrin.gif

IN DEFENSE OF NON-HIJABI SISTERS

It had been ten years since she had set foot in a mosque. Being at university had broadened her mind in many ways, one of them being her reconnecting with Islam.

She had begun praying five times a day a month ago, and now felt ready to pray in public, at the university’s Juma prayer.

She paused and stood a few feet away from the women’s entrance. Taking a deep breath, she pulled the silk scarf out of her purse and tied it carefully on her head. Her ponytail stuck out a bit. She smoothed the creases on her long-sleeved beige shirt and tugged at the bottom of it to make it longer over her pants.

The prayer was great. She had never felt this sense of inner peace.

Afterwards, she tried mingling with the sisters, but nobody even looked her way. A few of them even pretended not to hear her greeting. The only sister who did talk to her said in a huff: “You know your prayer is not accepted in those pants and that tiny thing you pass for a Hijab. I suggest you get more Islamic knowledge and dress properly before coming back here.”

The words stung her like a million bumble bees. Too numb to respond or speak, she charged out of the hall. Never again would she associate with these people, she told herself.

And never again would she return to Juma.


Are you shocked reading about this incident? Don’t be. It has been a reality in almost every Muslim community in North America.

This harsh judgment and intolerance shown towards Muslim women who do not wear Hijab can lead to at least some Muslim women to become alienated from the Muslim community, and could lead to a loss of Islamic practice.

While Hijab is an obligation clearly ordained in the Quran and Sunnah, the above-mentioned method of its enforcement and encouragement is not Islamic, according to Muslim scholars, researchers and activists. Muslims have to start seeing the issue from a different perspective, they say.

SOME ARGUMENTS IN SUPPORT OF NON-HIJABI SISTERS

”I would say that the overwhelming majority of Muslim women I have met who don’t cover and who believe in God, believe they should cover, but believe they’re not ready yet,” says Sharifa Alkhateeb, vice-president of the North American Council of Muslim Women, in an interview with Sound Vision.

This reality indicates there is a seed of faith that needs to be nurtured and encouraged. As well, it means these women need all the support they can get.

Abdalla Idris Ali is a member of the Islamic Society of North America’s (ISNA) Majlis Shura, which debates Islamic issues and establishes policy for the organization. He says what also has to be remembered is that many Muslim women are coming from cultures where the Hijab is not practiced, for whatever reason. These sisters should not be condemned. Rather, Islamic concepts like Hijab, should be explained to them.

Another possibility is that Muslim women who do not wear Hijab are coming from families which are either not practicing Islam, or are downright hostile to it.

In this situation, “it’s actually a celebration that a young Muslim woman wants to pray Juma,” says Kathy Bullock, who started wearing Hijab two weeks after she converted to Islam.
“I think that’s where the tolerance comes in.”

Another reason some Muslim women may find Hijab difficult is because of the often negative ideas surrounding Hijab. For instance, that wearing Hijab kills marriage and job prospects. Muslim activists must seek to dispel such myths.

”There needs to be a lot more support for the women who decide to cover,” says Bullock, who completed a PhD. about The Politics of the Veil from the University of Toronto in January.

Bullock also gives a chilling warning to those who condemn non-Hijabi Muslim women: “We might be wearing Hijab but we might be doing something incredibly wrong which cancels out the reward [for wearing it].” One of these things she mentions is arrogance.

WHY ARE SOME MUSLIMS SO SENSITIVE ABOUT THE HIJAB?

Some Muslims seek to condemn non-Hijabis out of their understanding of the Quranic injunction of enjoining the good and forbidding the evil. Yet, they fail to take the right approach in doing it, in accordance with the example of the Prophet Muhammad (peace and blessings be upon him), which was one of kindness, gentleness and patience.

Interestingly, some Muslim men and women who criticize non-Hijabi Muslim women seem to have different reasons for doing it and varying ways of approaching a sister who does not wear Hijab.

“Unfortunately on the brothers’ side there is a push to make Hijab the marker of Islamic identity,” says Bullock. She also emphasizes the hypocrisy of many Muslim men criticizing Muslim women who do not wear the Hijab, while they themselves wear tight jeans or pants, or short shorts. These forms of dress are strictly prohibited for men in Islam. Yet, go to any Juma or Jamaah prayer, and these forms of unIslamic dress can be easily seen.

”I think some of the men put too much emphasis on the women instead of looking at their own selves,“ she says.

However, Alkhateeb thinks most of the men are less vigilant than the women about Hijab, partly because they figure the women are going to take care of it.

She argues that the majority of the Muslim men who are over concerned about with the issue of Hijab because they don’t trust themselves sexually, and fear their own reaction to a woman who is not covered Islamically.

For women, weak self-identity and faith could explain the harshness shown towards non-Hijabi Muslimas.

“It is so difficult to maintain the practice of covering, emotionally, psychologically on the job and in everyday life, you get so much negativity from other people that the reaction of most of the practicing women and activists is to develop a cocoon, a protective cocoon, and part of that protective cocoon is in continually, verbally and in other ways rejecting what is unlike yourself,” explains Alkhateeb.

“And that is to shore up your own self-identity. I think that part of the reason they are so negative is because this is part of shoring up their own self-identity and because there is a hidden fear that if they let down their guard that they’ll stop covering. And if they allow any space in their mind to alternative ways of thinking that their thinking will fall apart. And that means that the underlying precepts and concepts are not strong.”

WHERE DOES HIJAB FIT ON THE ISLAMIC LADDER?

“While it is correct to say that Hijab is correct in the teaching of Islam we tend to forget that there are many other basic issues, why the over obsession?” asks Jamal Badawi, a member of the North American Fiqh Council.

Part of the reason some Muslims treat non-Hijabis so harshly is because of their *lack of understanding about where the obligation of Hijab ranks on the Islamic ladder. *

A more correct approach would be gradual and would mean implementing more important aspects of Islam, like Iman (faith), and praying five times a day before moving on to requirements like Hijab.

“We fail to see any Ayah (verse of the Quran) pertaining to Hijab in the entire Makkan revelation that was given to the Prophet, that’s almost 13 years. The injunctions about more detailed aspects relating to the righteous Muslim community were revealed during the Medinan period. Some in the middle, and later part of that period,” explains Badawi,

“This is a revealing lesson for us because it shows that Allah knew in advance what injunctions He wanted to reveal,” he adds. “Yet He delayed the revelation of those matters until many, many years of preparation on the level of Iman, submission to Allah, love of Allah and the sincere desire to voluntarily obey Allah and His Messenger. Once that base was established it wasn’t difficult at all for the believing women to willingly abide by the injunctions of Allah. “

Badawi says this is similar to how the Islamic commandment forbidding intoxicants was introduced.

“The same process of preparation took place to the point that when the final prohibition of intoxicants was revealed it wasn’t difficult for men to abide by that willingly and immediately.” He explains this was especially difficult for Muslim men, who were the ones reported more likely to consume alcohol than women at that time.

“Some well-intentioned Muslims seem to miss these lessons from the gradual revelation and become too legalistic to the point of doing more harm than benefit, notwithstanding their good intentions,” adds Badawi.

WRONGLY USING THE
“BASEBALL BAT” APPROACH TO THE HIJAB

“Muslims gain a little bit of knowledge and they want to run around with a baseball bat and beat people over the head with religion. That’s exactly what [has] made many young people leave the mosque,” says Alkhateeb.

Using the right method to tell Muslim women about Hijab is crucial, just as it is in advising Muslims to implement any other requirement of the faith.

“In the Prophet’s whole life he led by encouragement not pressure,” she says. “The way he behaved is the opposite of how most Muslims who are practicing Muslims behave towards each other in terms of giving advice. His way was not carrying around a religious baseball bat.”

The thinker and writer, who has also been an activist for the last 35 years points out the “baseball bat” methodology is in full swing when many Muslims encounter non-Hijabis.

“Instead of inviting her and embracing her, they’re immediately trying to think about what they can criticize her about,” says Alkhateeb.

The Prophet also did not use“vigilantes” to impose a religious requirement like Hijab.

“When we deal with the Sunnah, we find that he never appointed vigilantes to go around to reinforce something that believing Muslim women were encouraged to do, or use any harsh words or actions to arrive at that desired situation or desired setting,” says Badawi. “The approach that he followed which we should follow as our example was not to focus on issues like Hijab before Iman and psychological and spiritual preparation was in place.”

Badawi stresses inviting to Hijab and other Islamic requirements should be done in a way “that would motivate people to respect the moral values of society rather than simply forcing them to do so. In fact that goes back to the definition of Islam which is willing trusting and loving submission to Allah and obedience to His Messenger.”

As an example, he cited an incident from the lifetime of the Prophet when a Bedouin man urinated in the mosque. When other Muslims saw this, they became very angry and wanted to rebuke him harshly.

The Prophet on the other hand, stopped them and told the man gently what he was doing was incorrect.

“That story is a classic example of the contrast between the attitudes of some well-intentioned Muslims who want to correct the wrong immediately and by any means and the approach of the Prophet of kindness, gentleness, persuasion and wisdom,” he explains.

TEMPORARILY TOLERATING
THE WRONG: A RULE OF USUL AL-FIQH

“The other aspect which is frequently missed is another rule of ordaining the good and forbidding the evil which was addressed by many scholars especially by the famous Shaykh ul Islam Ibn Taymiyyah,” says Badawi. “The rule basically is that if in a given situation, attempting or trying to forbid the wrong may result in greater harm than benefit, then it is better to tolerate the wrong on a temporary basis.”

“I think the classic example that Ibn Taymiyyah is referred to is when the Tatars invaded Muslim lands,” explains Badawi. “He was told that some of these soldiers were drinking and that they should be stopped because this is part of forbidding the wrong yet, he advised that they should be left alone. His reasoning was that if those soldiers become sober, they might go on killing more people which is a greater harm than drinking”.

“This is not a new rule,” he emphasizes. ”It is a basic rule in Usul al-Fiqh, the roots of Islamic law, that if some harm is inevitable then it is better to tolerate the lesser harm in order to prevent great harm.”

Badawi demonstrates how this rule could apply to a situation where a Muslim sister who does not wear Hijab attends Juma prayer.

“For example, if that sister is approached in a harsh way she may not come again which could hurt her and hurt the community at large. But if she’s welcomed first and there’s demonstration of brotherhood and friendship, then in a gentle and wise way that is suitable for her, she can be encouraged, then of course it would be a far better result than the confrontational, harsh approach.”

INVOLVING NON-HIJABI SISTERS IN ACTIVITIES

“It’s only by mixing in the right company that someone who is contemplating Hijab will have the strength and courage to make the final act,” says Bullock.

This means women offering friendship, as well as involving the sisters in Islamic activities through organizations like Muslim Students’ Associations. Bullock notes that if a Muslim woman wants to do something for Islam she should be applauded “because she could be out there doing something else.”

“Muslim organizations have a duty to say what is right and to invite in the best of manner women to cover and to support them when they do so but that doesn’t mean individuals should be judgmental when women are not covering,” she adds.

INVOLVEMENT, BUT NOT LEADERSHIP

However, Ali and Badawi draw the line of involvement of non-Hijabi Muslim women in Muslim organizations at the leadership level.

They both say that any Islamically-oriented organization will select a person to be their leader who reflects their goals and aspirations. That means a Muslim woman who does not wear Hijab would not be selected because she is not fully following the precepts of Islam. Similarly, a Muslim man who is not fulfilling Islamic obligations like prayer, chaste behavior, etc. would also not be selected for a leadership position in such a milieu.

Badawi says this is not exclusion. Rather, it is the natural outcome in any milieu which aims to be Islamically-oriented. Its leadership will represent the precepts of Islam as much as possible.

“I’m against the term exclusion because if we apply the Islamic Shura (consultative) method then the leadership would emanate from the people, will be chosen by the people. And if the community or Islamic organization in a given setting are truly Islamically oriented, one would expect that the person chosen to be the spokesperson and symbol of that organization should reflect their conviction and values in the best possible way.”

A POSITIVE APPROACH

Badawi gives an example of how he, “with my weaknesses” approached an aggressive non-Hijabi sister and the result.

*Many years back, during a visit to Australia, one sister, during one of his lectures, a non-Hijabi Muslim woman asked questions about Hijab, in a disapproving manner. He talked to her kindly and give information without harshness.

Two years later, he returned to Australia, and a sister in full Hijab approached him, asking if he recognized her. He did not.

“I am the one who was arguing with you about Hijab two years ago,” she told him. “But it is the approach and information that you gave me that helped me to study more, to educate myself and to make up my own decision and I am happy with what I decided.”*


^^Believe to Understand^^**

oops..
here’s the addy:
http://www.soundvision.com/news/hijab/hjb.nonhijabi.shtml


^^Believe to Understand^^**

I suppose thats one way of looking at it. A man cannot pray namaz without covering up to the knees and without wudu. In the same way a woman shouldn’t pray if she is not properley covered. Almost all scholars have agreed that the hair is a part of a woman that should be covered. Some even go as far as saying that the hands and feet should be covered, as well as the face excluding the eyes.

Women should never be forced to wear hijab and I agree 100% that the only way is to educate in a non-accusing manner.

Lately the Hijab has become widely accepted over here and mashallah muslim women are not afraid to wear it. This can only be a good thing

http://www3.pak.org/gupshup/smilies/smile.gif

There are ADAB for every act practiced in Islam as said again and again that islam offers a complete role model for men and women in every aspect of life.
for Ms.hk …when you go on job or go for a job interview you dress up properly, actually the best you have.You take so much care of it so you can impress every one.Now thats what you call etiquettes…right.
Now think of God Almighty, When you are going to pray how should you behave( i mean dress etc) as dictated by Him or your own the best.Thats the answer if you can understand.
Islam would be in danger by distorting it according to your whims rather than understanding it and following it in a straight way.
Again I agree politeness is the ist condition to attract muslims as well as non muslims.
Take it easy.

http://www3.pak.org/gupshup/smilies/cool.gif

Do you erally think All Mighty Allah, who is the creator of this World, who controls life and death
would give a dime bout how people dress?
or how people offer their prayers?

I dont need to stand on a janamaz, wrapped in some piece of cloth to pray, ask, feel close to God

I agree prayers kinda bring a calming soothing effect
people go to church or mosques cause they want to feel a sense of belonging

but one can do without churches and mosques and temples and then also have an intense relationship with God

wht really amuses me is among so many problems this world is facing today from poverty, terrorism, the need for education,
some people are wasting their time discussing clothes

http://www3.pak.org/gupshup/smilies/rolleyes.gif

I would spend the time educating women, helping the abused, providing shelter for the neglected not worrying bout a strand of hair showing

Some ppl think discussing clothes will guarantee them with peace after death …For me its helping mankind that makes me closer to God

[This message has been edited by Anchal (edited January 18, 2001).]

Dear Ms.Anchal
you cannot pass your life in pieces, thats why muslims are suffering.They don’t want to pass thier lives as dictated by Islam.
God Himself has said that He may forgive us for not performing our duties towards Him but He will never forgive us for not performing our duties towards mankind.
Is’nt it that simple FYI.
U are missin the basic point, Success is in system, harmony, and organization and …
look at westren countries they have now adopted these things and we are lacking in it.
Take it easy dear.

http://www3.pak.org/gupshup/smilies/smile.gif

the reason i posted this was not to undermine the importance of hijab. The Holy Quran tells Muslim women to be modest and cover themselves properly. But the fact that some women dont wear hijab, doesnt mean that they’re not good Muslims. Many of them just arent ready for it or maybe brought up in a family where every female doesnt wear hijab.
There are many other things to being a Muslim and hijab is not the most important issue out there.
But what about those women who wear hijab and look down on women who dont…is that behaviour Islamic?
Hijab is not just some piece of cloth or wrapping…its a symbol of modesty and many women who wear it for the first time, especially converts, do feel a sense of inner peace and happiness and closer to Allah(swt).
As for those women who feel they dont need a hijab to be closer to God or they’re not ready, thats totally their decision and i dont think they should be condemned for it.

I have noticed that more and more women are wearing hijab in the west, despite the prejudice they face…and thats quite courageous of them. Lets just hope things change for the better in Turkey

http://www3.pak.org/gupshup/smilies/frown.gif


^^Believe to Understand^^**

[This message has been edited by hk (edited January 18, 2001).]

Originally posted by Anchal:
I would spend the time educating women, helping the abused, providing shelter for the neglected not worrying bout a strand of hair showing.

I agree with you Anchal baji, these things without a doubt are of greatest importance. They are the essence of the humanity which Islam strives to instill within us. And to deny that, to overlook that aspect does take away from you faith...your committment to islam.

Having said that, Anchal baji, Islam also teaches us hayaa...modesty. Hijab is not just about clothes--about dressing modestly it includes the way you act, your manners, your speech, your behaviour, and your appearance in public. Dress is only one facet of the total being, but it is still essential and the most crucial as it is the most visible aspect of practicing hijab.

Do you erally think All Mighty Allah, who is the creator of this World, who controls life and death
would give a dime bout how people dress?
or how people offer their prayers?

Thats true Allah swt does not need anything from us. Prayer is for our benefit. When we pray, we are not benefiting Allah. If every human being on this earth prayed, it would not increase or benefit Allah in any way, just as if nobody prayed, it would not decrease or affect Allah in any way. It is for us. Not perfoming namaaz, not praticing hijab IS wrong, doing so is doing so against the commands of Allah swt. But whether or not we do so is up to us, it is upon us that the freedom and responsibility ultimately lie.

hk, thanks for the story you posted up, its a reminder to all of us, whether we are addressing muslims or nonmuslims, we must show compassion, patience, and kindness.
* Be kind for everyone you meet is fighting a harder battle.*

[quote]
Originally posted by Girl from Quraysh:
Originally posted by Anchal:
**I would spend the time educating women, helping the abused, providing shelter for the neglected not worrying bout a strand of hair showing.

I agree with you Anchal baji, these things without a doubt are of greatest importance. They are the essence of the humanity which Islam strives to instill within us. And to deny that, to overlook that aspect does take away from you faith...your committment to islam.

Having said that, Anchal baji, Islam also teaches us hayaa...modesty. Hijab is not just about clothes--about dressing modestly it includes the way you act, your manners, your speech, your behaviour, and your appearance in public. Dress is only one facet of the total being, but it is still essential and the most crucial as it is the most visible aspect of practicing hijab.

Do you erally think All Mighty Allah, who is the creator of this World, who controls life and death
would give a dime bout how people dress?
or how people offer their prayers?

Thats true Allah swt does not need anything from us. Prayer is for our benefit. When we pray, we are not benefiting Allah. If every human being on this earth prayed, it would not increase or benefit Allah in any way, just as if nobody prayed, it would not decrease or affect Allah in any way. It is for us. Not perfoming namaaz, not praticing hijab IS wrong, doing so is doing so against the commands of Allah swt. But whether or not we do so is up to us, it is upon us that the freedom and responsibility ultimately lie.

hk, thanks for the story you posted up, its a reminder to all of us, whether we are addressing muslims or nonmuslims, we must show comp**ion, patience, and kindness.
* Be kind for everyone you meet is fighting a harder battle.

**
[/quote]

What you think of various uniforms from school to army????????

These dont make you better student or win wars either ,why do we wear them then???????

Anchal: If we call ourselves Muslim then we believe in Allah and his message in it's entirety. We cannot pick and choose, therefore, if Allah has asked us to dress and act modestly, then that should be our intention. Islam is not just a religion but a complete way of life.

Barkhodaar
I have seen women wearing hijabs on top and their legs showing at the bottom, drinking beer sitting in a pub

So would Allah pardon their display of flesh and their intake of liquor cause they are wearing a piece of cloth on their heads?

dont tell me what Islam is and what being a Muslim is

Muslim isnt a name tag that you pin on your shirt and get free access to Jannat
the sad part is that most individuals consider the above statement true

i have seen women like that as well..it is true that Allah(swt) will punish them for their behaviour but that is no excuse or reason for the rest of the Muslim women to not wear hijab. Nothing in life works that way...just because someone's following part of the rules and completely disregarding the rest does not give the rest of us any reason to not follow the rules either.
When Allah(swt) tells women (and men) to be modest, no one's personal opinion can change that...no matter how much logic they use to try and get around it.

24:31 And say to the believing women that they should lower their gaze and guard their modesty; that they should not display their beauty and ornaments except what (must ordinarily) appear thereof; that they should draw their veils over their bosoms and not display their beauty except to their husbands, their fathers, their husband's fathers, their sons, their husbands' sons, their brothers or their brothers' sons, or their sisters' sons, or their women, or the slaves whom their right hands possess, or male servants free of physical needs, or small children who have no sense of the shame of sex; and that they should not strike their feet in order to draw attention to their hidden ornaments. And O ye Believers! turn ye all together towards Allah, that ye may attain Bliss


^^Believe to Understand^*^*

Anchal: Thanks for agreeing, you cannot pick and choose what part of Islam is truth and what is not. Allah has already done that for us.

i'd also agree with GFQ.
Allah(swt) doesnt need anything from us.
whatever obligations we have as Muslims are there for our own benefit..wether its fasting in Ramadan or praying or giving zakat or being modest and wearing hijab.
why would Allah(swt) tell us to do something in the Quran and then expect us to not do it?
What matters is wether we choose to obey Him or not.....do our actions please Him or not.


^^Believe to Understand^*^*

was that for me cooldude?

http://www3.pak.org/gupshup/smilies/wink.gif


^^Believe to Understand^^**

[quote]
Originally posted by Anchal:
**Barkhodaar
I have seen women wearing hijabs on top and their legs showing at the bottom, drinking beer sitting in a pub

So would Allah pardon their display of flesh and their intake of liquor cause they are wearing a piece of cloth on their heads?

dont tell me what Islam is and what being a Muslim is

Muslim isnt a name tag that you pin on your shirt and get free access to Jannat
the sad part is that most individuals consider the above statement true **
[/quote]

What were you doing in a place like that?

.

Allah created each and every one of us and he is the one who provides us in every conditions. The problem is that we depend on people for help and ask for things from people and not from Allah. If you ask from Allah then you don't need to spread you hands in front of some other country to help them feed the poor.

If one doesn't learn the basics of Islam then how can he/she practice Islam properly. How to dress properly for Namiz is something you must know. It is not waste of time to discuss.

GOD tells us how to warship him then why do some one go a try some knew way to get close to GOD. Helping man kind is nice act and Allah will reward you for it. But if you didn't pray propperly didn't dress properly,but if you didn't do what GOD says then what are you actually doing. Following Shatan I guess,

bye
Naeem

[This message has been edited by naeem_dimple (edited January 19, 2001).]

[This message has been edited by Girl from Quraysh (edited January 19, 2001).]

[quote]
Originally posted by Anchal:
**Barkhodaar

dont tell me what Islam is and what being a Muslim is

Muslim isnt a name tag that you pin on your shirt and get free access to Jannat
the sad part is that most individuals consider the above statement true **
[/quote]

You comments are very true. You have no idea what Islam is all about?

Can you explain the second comments what you mean by that?

-naeem

What is most sickening is that people like Anchal would agree 100% with their ugly kafir recruiter who tells them to dress appropriately when going for an interview with some ugly manager. Or to dress a certain way for some stupid wedding or job party, I hear it all the time in the office, talk of clothes, etc ,why no stupid fit then? ...But when a muslim sister advises to dress appropriately when facing the great Almighty creator, they have a stupid meaningless fit. That advise is more valuable then anything they the poor ignorant souls ever probably heard.
Helping abused woman? sheltering the needy?
solving muslim problems around the world?
Ever thought that maybe we have these problems because we don't obey Allah?
You want to solve major problems when you can't even accept the minor islamic rules and commandments of our creator?
What a joke!

Your right, Allah does not need our obedience, we NEED to obey him! for our sustenance, protection and victory in this life and hereafter! Do what the hell you want, but atleast have courage to accept the truth, even if you choose not to follow it.
Allah is so merciful, even that he credits and recognizes.
Salaam

Very well said borther..STRONGMAN.

-Naeem

[This message has been edited by Girl from Quraysh (edited January 19, 2001).]

naeem_dimple,

If you cannot refrain from making personal attacks your posts will be deleted. This is your warning.