Re: Importance Of Caste In Marriage
my family dosent care much now but few years back it was like a guna 
..alot of my cousins are married in different castes n no one has a problem with that.as my uncle says family should be good n muslim then there s nothing wrong with marrying in other cast …its good 
Re: Importance Of Caste In Marriage
THIS IS THE FIRST TIME I HAVE EVER HEARD OF PAKISTANI "CASTES" I HAVE HEARD OF FAMILY'S MARRYING INTO FAMILIES, CERTAIN RELIGIOUS SECTS MARRYING INTO THOSE SECTS, AND I SUPPOSE IF YOU ARE FROM TRIBAL AREAS, THEN WITHIN THAT TRIBE...BUT NEVER HEARD OF CASTES IN PAKISTAN!!!
caste system is a heirarchy, i.e. an objective set heirarchy of different castes...where one is on top, then there is one that is number 2, then there is one that ranks thrid and then fourth, and so on and one is at the bottom.
Can you honestly list the groups you mentioned in that order..i.e. can you honestly say that there is an objective perspective that pathans are on top, the second class is jutt's the third class is syed, the fourth class is shiekh, the fifth aryian...and so on and so forth! now IF that were true you could say there is a caste system!
I understand how you are possibly trying to compare the close-mindedness in pakistani communities to the caste system! but that is not what a "caste system" is. Caste systems are wrong and should be illegal! while i dont care..about any such boundaries myself, i dont think it should be illegal for people to choose to marry within thier own kind..i.e. jutt. aryian...etc.
Plus the more we are around other kinds of people, the more open-minded we will be ...and while all this will take a while...eventually people will realize that their friends are ppl too...and differences really dont matter!
Re: Importance Of Caste In Marriage
I think the people in pakistan cosider this a very sold reason for marriage that the guy/girl must be same caste ....& desi they don't care about it as far as i think
Re: Importance Of Caste In Marriage
Caste doesn’t matter to me at all, the elders in our family do take these things serious but young generation don’t care for such backwardness.
I’m hooked up but if I wasn’t I wouldn’t care as long as she was sexy and shareef that’s all that matters, what’s the point in narrowing your options?
I don’t even care for ethnicity/nationality, these are just regional traditions which can be adopted by anyone when they move to that area. Being Muslim is the main thing I guess.
Re: Importance Of Caste In Marriage
Which is a huge contradiction on its own...
I am a Syed, and initially when I came to Pakistan I found it very wierd that so much significance was placed on finding a Syed for a Syed when it came to marriage;now I kind of understand why a parent would want their kids to marry within the zaat. Reason being that future generations of Syeds can claim to carry the on the blood of the Prophet and Imams. As an impartial observer I notice that there is a certain trait always attached to a particular caste. Spirituality being the trait most Syeds(supposedly) inherently possess is supposed to flourish in a better way when a Syed marries a Syed. At least that is the esplaination my parents gave when i questioned their objection to marriage outside their caste.
Re: Importance Of Caste In Marriage
the thing is in my mind it shouldnt matter but my parents they are very proud of the fact that we are choudhry’s and all with mughal roots. whenever i have heard them talking is that your marriage will be in the “family”. not even to another choudhry or mughal or lohar(they can accept all three of these) In the family only!
Re: Importance Of Caste In Marriage
I don't even know what "caste" my family is from.
Re: Importance Of Caste In Marriage
One of my friends is going through this situation right now her family are rajpoot and his are mochi but her dad has said he will never allow her to marry the guy. What are ppl going to think, that's doing his beysti. His daughter isn't young either she going onto 30 but he rather have her sat at home than marry in a lower caste.
Re: Importance Of Caste In Marriage
It does matter for some.. I remember my parents talking about it with me and how hard it was for them to get married back in the day. My mom's side is Punjabi and Jatt and they are really big on that... for my mom to marry out of her caste was like blasphemy for some of them and a lot of them stopped talking to her.. it was ridiculous.
It still does happen though in rare cases I find but it's not as common.. thankfully people have evolved in their soch and focus on bigger issues.
Re: Importance Of Caste In Marriage
it does NOT matter to me one bit. All Muslims are EQUAL and i do NOT see any caste above any other. Islam teaches that ALL Muslims are brothers and sisters in Islam. so i do NOT discriminate...period!
Re: Importance Of Caste In Marriage
It should not matter in this day and age.
Re: Importance Of Caste In Marriage
Caste is still important in rural areas, and among pakistanis who immigrated/moved from these areas to the west/cities.
Its silly when parents put more emphasis on caste and family background, than the type of person they are marrying their spawn to.
Importance Of Caste In Marriage
If you believe and subscribe to Islamic principles, zaat, etc. doesn't and shouldn't matter. Having said that; I come from a punjabi gujjar family and my family kicked up a big fuss over a recent Rajpoot rishta. It was embarrassing for me and the guy but alhamdulillah, alhamdulillah, alhamdulillah my family eventually got over their issues with him being from a 'lower caste' family.
One of my friends is going through this situation right now her family are rajpoot and his are mochi but her dad has said he will never allow her to marry the guy. What are ppl going to think, that's doing his beysti. His daughter isn't young either she going onto 30 but he rather have her sat at home than marry in a lower caste.
LOWER caste? What the hell? Seriously, her father needs to grow up. Castes are not even part of Islam! Is his caste more important than his religion? This caste things really makes ppl sound like Hindus who discriminate between Brahmins, Untouchables etc even to this day.
I agree that one may not want to marry into a specific "race" like Punjabi or Pathans, and I respect that. However, one shouldn't consider the other person to be "lower". Sick!
Re: Importance Of Caste In Marriage
Some are truly silly, they rather marry their daughters to "high" caste hoodlums than "low" caste shareef people. I've seen well educated girls get married to complete jahils, purely on basis of caste.
The choice should be of the person getting married, not the parents. Parents should of course be free to give advice.
Re: Importance Of Caste In Marriage
[quote="rosedreams"]
LOWER caste? What the hell? Seriously, her father needs to grow up. Castes are not even part of Islam! Is his caste more important than his religion? This caste things really makes ppl sound like Hindus who discriminate between Brahmins, Untouchables etc even to this day.
I agree that one may not want to marry into a specific "race" like Punjabi or Pathans, and I respect that. However, one shouldn't consider the other person to be "lower". Sick!/QUOTE
i know I feel embarrassed even posting it on here, but it's the truth. My cousin is distort and knows she can never find a guy that loves her more than him. But her family are not budging from their decision. Her dad has said over his dead body
Re: Importance Of Caste In Marriage
If you believe and subscribe to Islamic principles, zaat, etc. doesn't and shouldn't matter. Having said that; I come from a punjabi gujjar family and my family kicked up a big fuss over a recent Rajpoot rishta. It was embarrassing for me and the guy but alhamdulillah, alhamdulillah, alhamdulillah my family eventually got over their issues with him being from a 'lower caste' family.
I'm hearing this for the first time, is the Rajput tribe considered to be a "lower caste" compared to the Gujjar tribe? :D
Re: Importance Of Caste In Marriage
LOWER caste? What the hell? Seriously, her father needs to grow up. Castes are not even part of Islam! Is his caste more important than his religion? This caste things really makes ppl sound like Hindus who discriminate between Brahmins, Untouchables etc even to this day.
I agree that one may not want to marry into a specific "race" like Punjabi or Pathans, and I respect that. However, one shouldn't consider the other person to be "lower". Sick!
IMO, not wanting to marry outside the caste or to someone from a "lower caste" isn't that different from not wanting to marry into a different, specific ethnicity.
Re: Importance Of Caste In Marriage
Preference for same caste is just like someone may prefer a taller/slimmer/humorous etc person! It depends on your reasoning! I would prefer to get married into same caste only because i feel the living style is usually similiar amd NOT cuz of any superiority complex. So it really depends! Just like say someone may prefer a humorous person over someone serious or vice versa. Doesnt mean one is better or worse than the other, its just the individual's choice.
Re: Importance Of Caste In Marriage
Preference for same caste is just like someone may prefer a taller/slimmer/humorous etc person! It depends on your reasoning! I would prefer to get married into same caste only because i feel the living style is usually similiar amd NOT cuz of any superiority complex. So it really depends! Just like say someone may prefer a humorous person over someone serious or vice versa. Doesnt mean one is better or worse than the other, its just the individual's choice.
What personality or cultural traits does caste give? Living style is based on financial, educational, ethnic and cultural background.