But it should matter :) That's why i said its imp for both to be well groomed. I didnt say it was only for the women to do so.
From what i have heard, most of the times its lack of physical part that brings all the differences in couples and i think emotional aspect is also somewhat connected to it and vice versa. But i suppose married people would know better so i would like to give you benefiit of doubt here.
If things like extra hair on our bodies mattered this much then life would really get miserable for married people :)
There are numerous times when a person is not able to take care of himself or herself. Sickness, pregnancies, working extra hours, other many things out there. Yes there is no room for being unhygienic but waxing/hair removal/shaving are a different story.
If things like extra hair on our bodies mattered this much then life would really get miserable for married people :)
There are numerous times when a person is not able to take care of himself or herself. Sickness, pregnancies, working extra hours, other many things out there. Yes there is no room for being unhygienic but waxing/hair removal/shaving are a different story.
Lol. You know what Sara. I am actually gonna ask him if he was indeed trying to save some money couple of months back.
Waisay before I got married I used to think like Maham and some other girls as well. My cousin and couple of friends told me it doesn't matter. And it does not.
SweetLady if you are not comfortable don't do it. If its just a little bit of what we call "rouwaa" then don't worry. There are very few men out there who are extra particular regarding this issue.
& no I am not saying don't wax & all because heck with husbands a woman herself feels more sexy & beautiful when she is all smooth. Do whatever you ladies are comfortable with. There are no hard & fast rules regarding waxing/hair removing for your wedding. A person should be clean & well groomed either way. Its all about personal preferences.
SweetLady if you are not comfortable don't do it. If its just a little bit of what we call "rouwaa" then don't worry. There are very few men out there who are extra particular regarding this issue.
& no I am not saying don't wax & all because heck with husbands a woman herself feels more sexy & beautiful when she is all smooth. Do whatever you ladies are comfortable with. There are no hard & fast rules regarding waxing/hair removing for your wedding. A person should be clean & well groomed either way. Its all about personal preferences.
thnz bint-e-naeem baji!! cuz of u i dooo feel myself more comfi with it :D !
this is a bit embaressing, but im engaged but my fiance doesn't know that im so hairy, sure i try to take care of myself waxing and stuff, but only on areas like legs, arms, important areas where women normally remove hair. but i am quite fair and have dark hair so there the hair is really visible on my back stomach really big places. Sure before the wedding night i can get a full body removal, bt how can i keep this up after marriage?
does anyone else have the same problem?
Have you ever went to a gynecologist? Excessive hair on the body can be a result of a ovarian cyst. My sister has a lot of body hair but thin hair on her scalp. After months of pestering her to make an appointment with the gynecologist the doctor found a 5mm ovarian cyst. The ovarian cyst was causing a hormone imbalance will resulted in excessive body hair. Otherwise you can go to American Laser Center. The lasers they use are the best for desi skin, even the darkest skin!
I bleach my back hair... when i need to! i some how stupidly decided to converse with my fiance about body hair as i did not need him to be shocked! ... ( my bhabi's are lucky me and my my ammi are always talking about waxing and so forth so it does not bug the boys!)
so i said to him you know i am not naturally hair free , i have to wax etc so please dont b shocked when you see the hair! the only thing he said would bug him would be leg hair! but he said it does not bother him as it would not stop him :P ( and he also mentioned that even if i was a hairy bear it would not bother him but i am so not hairy according to him!) so he does not see why i need to go through the process of hurting myself with wax! he also suggested i should shave as it probably hurts way less :P
i also said to him i am going to get my back waxed for the wedding ( i have those light hair , that apparently no one else can see.. jhootay!!) but i can see them and i do bleach here and there ... the fiance got angry and told me to leave myself alone :D
so no i do not think it bothers men ... but things like upper lip, and pubic regions in my personal opinion should be clean!
im going to get married in feb and im prety scared...:( ,i normaly hav my half of arms(till my elbow ) and legs (till knees)waxed and i dotn want more then that coz i dont really feel comfortable showing my body to any1 not even the waxing lady + if you mess with hair once then you have to do it forever u knw coz the hair which grow back after are diff from teh natural ones... dont knw what to do and am really confused... i really dotn want to change my waxing routine but on teh other hand im worried about what my hubby wud think...plz tell me what shud i do
first of all i am a guy and i dont want to offend anyone etc but i thought you ladies should know what guys REALLY think.
As for the bride who started this thread - Yes you are paranoid and self conscious but is that the most stressfull thing regarding your marriage? there are many products out there such as waxing, electrolysis which are very affordable and cost next to nothing. as for "Bleaching" - NO! HELL NO!! bleaching just makes the hair stand out more and looks like each strand of hair has been individually gelled to stick out and expose itself for everyone (i know this because one ofmy colleagues get bleached every other week).
The Ladies that have said "Men dont mind" - your gith a majority of them dont because they love that person and accept them for who they are. and if thats the case then the woman should not worry about her being hairy or overweight etc. the truth is that some men dont notice or bother because it becomes so annoying and irritating that they lose all interest in the woman - therefore the original problem. - this is hwere you get some men who "play the field".
Me and my partner always attempt to take good care of ourselves and because personal hygiene is important. for example, my partner gets waxing done, threading, face masks, body wraps, facials, pedicures, manicures etc and i get my chest, back and arms waxed, threads and facials. its not so much as a method to glorify yourself but as long as you are both trying to make the effort for each other in order to have that spark.
i have been with my partner now for about 2 years and we still feel the love for each other as we did on the first day. i love her regardless of what she looks like and if she has not had her nails done for a week - SO WHAT?
although if she does start to get more hair on her back or chest than me then i would question it because no one wants a woman to be more manly then the guy. im not been sexist or a chauvanist but just generic chivalry is to be used here.
bottom line is if you both love each other than accept each other for who they are, warts and all. if either feel self conscious or paranoid then talk to each other. maybe do stuff together (Spa days etc). if you still agree then maybe its time to think is this relationship for me.
many thanks and i hope i didnt offend anybody. just wanted to tell you from a guys point of view.
People of the South Asian region are naturally hairy so you shouldn't be too worried. Just look after yourself it forms part of hygiene. You'll be fine. :)
One guys pov, to be clear. Bleaching your back, epilating other bits... Ouch. Be more confident in yourselves, ladies! Your partner is no hair free male model, why would he have the same expectations of u? Why would u be after such perfection yourself? Life, esp. married life, should be a much richer, fuller experience than u worrying about back hair! For goodness sake, ladies and gents, focus on other things for a change, like what kind of spouse and in law you are going to be.
Also in case ur worried, let me be blunt, how much hair u have and where u have it, is the last thing on either of ur minds wen ur getting busy. So stop stressing.
i really dont think most guys care about body hair. i was so concsious too initially when i got married and would keep my legs hairfree all the time. but after a few weeks, it all stopped. he doesnt care at all, he just makes fun of me when it gets really really bad ( like 2--3 months of not shaving my legs). but even then he doesnt really mind.
i agree its just one guys point of view but as i said, all ametters how comfortable you feel with your spouse. and if you cannot see over the little things then what have you got? its nice to make a gesture for your spouse to do things like that but is it really necessary?
i go for weeks even months not waxing my chest but my partner does not complain because she accepts it. i do it for myself and her liking it is a plus.
p.s. as other members have posted, when your christening your wedded life, who cares of a bit of baal? just do pure dhamaal. (sorry cheesy pun i know but had to be done! lmao)
I agree w/ the stuff posted above: guys usually don't care as long as it isn't too crazy. Of course if it's health related, they should def. not care. However, regardless of that, I feel like a girl always feels better when she isn't concerned about the hair. So why not try to remove what you can, the rest shouldn't be too much of a worry. I already told my fiance that girls cannot be hairfree all the time and he just happens to be so awesomely understanding so he said he knows I can't be waxing all the time. Plus, his mom is pretty open about this kind of stuff so she made sure he knew from whenever he was a kid that women have hair and they don't like boys pointing it out because they don't like it themselves. So he's very sensitive about that, especially because his mom dealt w/ minor menopause hair growth on the face.
I was just surprised that guys don't even notice half the time. It all comes down to how comfortable you are w/ each other at the end of the day.
I don't want to sound rude, but how hairy can your back be? Also I think it's a bit unfair on your husband to get your back waxed for your wedding. Most men are aware that women have hair on the legs, arms and private area, but I think waxing your back is kind of misreprenting yourself. No offense intended.
please move this to life1.