If you won't look, you won't find the one.

[Paheli00]

Re: If you won’t look, you won’t find the one.

@Ashy2010

I believe that desi guys give izzat to girls who are difficult to get,

I’m curious…What is the basis for this particular belief? Do you have guy friends who have led you to believe that guys want to marry girls who’re “difficult to get”? Every single woman you know in-real-life…did ALL of them have an arranged marriage?

@Ashy2010

For me, being friendly with desi guys who are a match makes me think that that they would have a negative image of me and my character and they will consider me some girl out to find a guy on her own and thus thinking bad about me. So being friendly with them doesn’t lead a girl anywhere since a desi guy CAN consider an overly-friendly and liberal girl for friendship but NOT for marriage.

Its like juggling between how to be friendly with a desi guy without being tooo obvious and without losing my character and values. I don’t want the guy to think that I am out on a mission to find a guy on my own and using strategies to prusue them.
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I saw this mentioned earlier too. This might be my own ignorance but I’m actually very confused by this. When it’s suggested that you talk to a guy in a friendly matter at a social event…what exactly do you think would be considered inappropriate about that? What do you think will be said by the girl that would lead a guy to believe that she’s not suitable for marriage?

We’re not talking about a situation where you’re (not YOU but girls in general) dressed like a slut and having a conversation about sex or other inappropriate topics. We’re definately not talking about a scenario where you’re physically all over a guy. In situations where its a respectable social gathering (professional/work events, house parties at a friend’s house etc.)…if a girl initiates a conversation…or responds in a friendly manner to a guy who approaches her…how does that lead to you losing values or character?

Maybe the guys I know are all weird but they all dislike girls who do the “I’m difficult to get” routine. They consider these girls to be stuck-up and don’t consider them for anything. In their view, why bother wasting time on someone who doesn’t want to be approached…when there are plenty other girls who’re open to getting to know them.

I’d really love to know if any guys reading this would give more izzat to girls who refuse to carry a friendly chatter and come across as being difficult to get. Would any of you (guys reading this) consider them more of the “wife material” versus a girl who chooses to react to you in a friendly/“I’m open to getting to know you” manner?