Sorry if that's how I sounded. What I meant was, stop being apologetic. The religion says hitting is allowed.
And what's light? Who defines light?
It's hard to take a religion seriously when it has teachings like this. You might be okay with spousal abuse, I'm not.
I read a hadith somewhere (cant find it now) that "beating lightly" means hitting as not to leave a mark, and with nothing larger than a miswaak (teeth cleaner).
But back to the original question, and not bringing religion into it:
Not that my husband would EVER lay even a finger on me, but I have told him that if he were to ever hit me, I would hit him back. I would not just cry about it. Yes, I may not cause him any pain if I punch his arm or face, but I have taken self-defense classes, and they show you how to hit so it counts.
i know a couple, the girl is from a good family, was my college fellow, got married to a guy in uk,
after marriage and after reaching uk she came to know that he drinks alcohol,
so whenever she stopped him, he reacted very harshly.
after sometime she visited me and was very sad,
hope things are better in her life :) aamen
so that all reminded me that god forbid if anything bad happens girls should be confident in throwing away things :D to their hubbies