Mix 2 parts dishonesty, 1 part lack of knowledge about anything beyond pointless gossip, 3 parts ability to ignore Islamic rules about kindness, backbiting, and minding your own business and mix together with a healthy dose of a lack of anything better to do with one’s time…and you’ll be well on your way to chalaak-dom, whether man or woman.
You’re wrong. We can have sabr and pray to Allah for guidance AND recognize our own faults and try to improve.
And don’t forget…what goes around, does come around.