"I still miss the first one- every now and then!"

Lifestyle Relationships
21

Re: "I still miss the first one- every now and then!"

MYwish hahahahah ....hahahaha very funny ..............................

22

Re: "I still miss the first one- every now and then!"

it's sad really to hear that this happens, and she is not the only one, many women go through this, where they are not truley involved in their marriage, it is like 2 people just living together, not interacting.

23

Re: "I still miss the first one- every now and then!"

to me she sounds like a person who won't be happy with anyone she is with. She's one those people who don't realize what they have and think that if they were with someone else they would be better of.

She needs a reality check.

24

Re: “I still miss the first one- every now and then!”

that is really, really sad. yesh thats my thought:halo:

25

Re: “I still miss the first one- every now and then!”

:omg: you are funny :k:

26

Re: "I still miss the first one- every now and then!"

maybe she should've gone with the other guy........then the other guy would've played her and dumped her........then she would be on here posting about how all guys are horrible.

27

Re: "I still miss the first one- every now and then!"

I'll speak from experience here....I think everyone goes through that phase in their marriage, but these are completely normal feelings, especially after so many years together. The trick is navigating through these feelings.

You know, I think she and and her husband are suffering from a little burn out. The truth is that once you get married and have a child, life becomes very busy and it becomes hard to talk to one another. Sometimes you're too tired, or have other things to do, or there's too many interruptions, etc. I would bet she's exhausted from taking care of the child and from doing all the housework and he's exhausted from working like a dog outside the home.

Her fantasizing about the other one kind of makes me think she's a bit immature. Many people do that--they put the first guy on a pedestal because they only remember the youthful, carefree times. Obviously it didn't work out with the first one for SOME reason. Who knows, maybe her life would have been five times worse if she married guy #1 and there's no point in playing the "what if" game. It doesn't solve anything. And incidentally, many gorian who do rekindle relationship with earlier boyfriends because of boredom in their marriage are bitterly disappointed with their lovers and end up destroying their marriages in the process.

I would suggest that she and her husband try to make it a point of trying to go out alone when they can (have a relative babysit the child). They should even try and take a vacation together. It really helps freshen up the environment in the home. Also, the both of them should try to do a bit of a lifestyle change. Maybe plan it so the baby sleeps earlier so they can have a few quiet hours alone each day. They can start working out or getting makeovers (I know this sounds crazy, but a little variety is always good, isn't it?). Even redecorate their bedroom. Whatever it takes to freshen up the "mahol" at home.

If that still doesn't help, maybe they can get some counselling.

UK
28

Re: "I still miss the first one- every now and then!"

Basic human nature, u've got it all but you still want to try something else and until you do, curiosity is killing you.

29

Re: "I still miss the first one- every now and then!"

I could be wrong Nia, but the only reason I can see any woman saying this is if she isn't 100% happy in her current relationship. Most people only dwell on the past if they are not over it.

She should, perhaps, focus on why she fell in love with her husband. What is it about him that made her marry him and spend the rest of her life with him? Nobody is perfect and there is no such thing as the perfect relationship. Khair, she should work on really being happy with her husband. Other than that, I agree with everything Raatkirani has said.

30

Re: "I still miss the first one- every now and then!"

WTF,

did you read the first post or it just went directly to "I hate Men" time of the month.

31

Re: “I still miss the first one- every now and then!”

^^^ Please tameez ke dairay mei reh kar guftagoo karo :snooty:

32

Re: "I still miss the first one- every now and then!"

sounds like, "hum dil dei chuke sanam"

Egjactly!!!

My 4 yrs relationship is going to end pretty soon and the girl keeps on reminding me that she will never ever forget me (that's understandable) but she doesn't think she will ever be able to adjust with her husband, i know she will be fine after a while but i am scared she will do the same what this girl is doing to her life :(. I have spent hours and hours speaking to her and she is kind of getting excited about her marriage but i don't want her to think like this girl (nia's friend) and destroy her life, don't think it will be good for her future, the girl is too good to be dishonest but i just hope she will recover quickly.

33

Re: "I still miss the first one- every now and then!"

if you loved her, why didnt you fulfil your promises ??

its not a joke.

34

Re: "I still miss the first one- every now and then!"

sometimes things just dont work out that way. ^^

35

Re: “I still miss the first one- every now and then!”

:omg:

36

Re: “I still miss the first one- every now and then!”

sorry mahru, just read your sig. :bummer:

UK
37

Re: "I still miss the first one- every now and then!"

Nia, looks like her personality is way different than that of her husband. She's more communictaing type and he appears to be quiet or not sharing. There are people, esp. some men are not that open or cannot share that easily. I know someone who is very caring and sharing kinda gal but her hubby is different. He cares for her and loves her (love-marriage) but he doesn't make extra efforts to show. Like she expects him to show more say more often that he loves her and his philosophy is that if he doesn't communicate, doesn't mean he doesn't love, he still does. Okay, then why not share, talk about things, anything... but he's a reserve and quiet kind of person. Esp. when he has some tensions, he goes into solitude and quietude. Whereas, she longs to hear him speak about things, to know his troubles. She's smart, educated woman and probably can give him some advice or consolation but he just doesn't share.

At one point, I thought, how are they going to get along for the rest of their life. She's all open, all out there, and he's just the opposite. They did fall in love and married against all odds..... huhhh

I think your friend needs to ask her sincerely if she can work things out in this relationship. If she's so unsatisfied, doesn she want to seperate? Or does she think, things are not that worse and it's only the communication issue. She can sit down and try to talk to him about her concerns. Yet better, she can write to him, a letter or an email. When people cannot talk face to face, written communication helps remove some barrier and letting your point of view across without getting frustrated. Once her husband can see her dissastisfaction, they might be able to work it out on their own, or they can always seek marriage counselling.

Hope things work out for them.

38

Re: "I still miss the first one- every now and then!"

Kahani Poori Filmi hai

39

Re: “I still miss the first one- every now and then!”

I wish life was THAT easy:hoonh:

Is there
40

Re: "I still miss the first one- every now and then!"

I agree with this, watching too many soap operas or reading too many of those idiotic Khawateen digest is not good for marriage.