seriously.
i’m surrounded by jerks at home, at school and at work even my friends have their jerk-y moments.
i’m tired of complaining and i’m pretty sure people are tired of hearing me complain so now, how the heck do i grow a spine and actually SAY something??
my problem is that when an incident occurs or someone says something…my mind goes blank. and i only think of wat to say AFTER the incident.
abh main kya karooN??
seriously.
i'm tired of complaining and i'm pretty sure people are tired of hearing me complain so now, how the heck do i grow a spine and actually SAY something??
You need to go on a vacation. Why ? Because you are saying contradictory things . See the red and blue quoted text they are contradictory statements.
Re: I need a backbone
^ It's not a contradiction.
What i meant was that when something happens... i stay quiet. but then later on i yap other ppls ears off by complaining that so and so said or did that and i wish i coulda said that.. etc..
so that's what i mean wheN i say that i wish i could just say what i need to say to that person at htat particular time instead of complain to a third person afterwards.
Re: I need a backbone
It will take some practice but you can do that , but be prepared to be most hated person. Sometimes we need to just let it slide. No need to throw punches all around if it is not hurting you in any way.
Re: I need a backbone
^ I think i already am pretty hated by some people, but this is more "masked" hatred, like "friends" who i am pretty sure secretly laughing at me, or some who just barely mask their contempt at me...i guess if i started ot talk, ill really earn that "hatred" and yeah it is hurting me, i've let things slide foryears, at one point, it never becomes about letting one thing slide but it's just adding up to everything else that u've let slide for years and it builds up til it breaks.
Re: I need a backbone
Seriously take a vacation if you can that will relax you and will prepare you to tolerate that jerkiness all around you for one more year.
Re: I need a backbone
Maybe...it feels like forever since i've had a real vacation.......
so that's what i mean wheN i say that i wish i could just say what i need to say to that person at htat particular time.
......u need to start doing it right away.
also what i've learnt from my life is never expect anything from anyone , not even their sympathy , u get hurt the most @ hands of others when u expect the most .
Re: I need a backbone
That used to happen to me. What I did was spend less time with people who were making me upset. Got myself busy with stuff. Basically, it is all about taking charge of your life.
Also, understand that your situation is temporary. Insha’Allah. Soon everything will fall into place.
Finally, with the hope that I don’t sound like a religious fanatic which I am not by any means, what helped me develop more tolerance was reading Namaz e Hajjat for getting out of my situation. It worked. And it will work for you too. 
HeY Niksik… hmm no it doesn’t have to do much with the situation alone… but it’s a general thing, no matter what siutation i’m in there’s always going to be a butthead who’s going to act/say something stupid. Whether it’s a good frend or a coworker or stupid relative..etc…
and no u dont sound liek a religious fanataic..it is the right and good advice..thanks
Sara, I know that happens all the time. People are so opinionated and love to interfere or annoy without even realizing what they are doing.
Hubby once told me that if something is not going to matter 2 years down the road, let it go. Don’t allow space in your brain for insignificant happenings.
Try the Hajjat, and give yourself a break. Did you get that massage I have been telling you about? 
Re: I need a backbone
Nahi 
Re: I need a backbone
Get it done this weekend!
Re: I need a backbone
U think the massage will bring out my backbone? :@:
Re: I need a backbone
Yes, it will relax the muscles and reveal that bone that has been hiding behind all the tension!
Re: I need a backbone
I'm kind of like that myself, but sometimes I just don't say anything because I KNOW that it won't make a difference. Like, I don't know about you, but the kind of people I've been around wouldn't be affected even if I lectured them for an hour (even if they pretend to be affected/listening).. it's like they don't care, why should I? So sometimes when I am in control of myself and HAVE to sit with these people, I just don't bother getting serious, and just dish out any smart-ass comment when they bark. lol.
Re: I need a backbone
^ if i could do JUST THAT eveN! lol
seriously.
i'm surrounded by jerks at home, at school and at work even my friends have their jerk-y moments.
mayb its not them, mayb the problem is in u. mayb u feel like they're bugging u bcs u bug them. i've seen ur posts, and u tell off ppl 4 no other reason than that you dont agree with their opinion. ur extremely bathamese and have no patience whatsoever.. so mayb u r the biggest jerk of them all.
cheers! :p
Re: I need a backbone
i liked how he spelled bathamese!