Re: i know this is a embrassing questionn but i need help!
jst take some condoms with you! and yeah the other guppies covered it mostly…u gta start talkn to him b4 u get married
dr.khoobsurat - 
Re: i know this is a embrassing questionn but i need help!
Re: i know this is a embrassing questionn but i need help!
This thread just killed my happy mood. I have a really weird expression on my face right now. I gotta see it in the mirror.. poof
Re: i know this is a embrassing questionn but i need help!
for some reason, i think that is not right to use any kind of birth control method without talk to your husband, it's like cheating, what if he really want to have kids and wife is taking birth control while husband is looking fwd to having kids without even knowing that there are no chances, just because a woman can control this fact up to some limitation, is not right for her to do it just because "she" wants to do it while husband have no knowledge of it, i know most of u will disagree with me, but i really think it should be done "only" when both husband and wife agree to it
Re: i know this is a embrassing questionn but i need help!
^ i understand where you're coming from, but there are always exceptions that make it allowable. like in this case, she doesn't seem to know her husband well enough to be able to discuss this with him, but yet it seems clear that consummating the marriage is a done deal on their first night together. for her to get preggo from that is pretty crappy, i think, so if she can't bring herself to talk to him, then i think she should take steps to ensure she doesn't end up in a situation she's not ready for. ultimately, women are the ones who have to go through pregnancy, labor and be primary caregivers after birth. its a huge lifestyle change and a major commitment and if you're not ready, regardless of whether your husband is or isn't, then you're not ready, and you shouldn't let any "accidents" happen.
Re: i know this is a embrassing questionn but i need help!
^^And if they don't agree? Should the husband just get the wife pregnant anyway?
I'm just curious.
Re: i know this is a embrassing questionn but i need help!
Re: i know this is a embrassing questionn but i need help!
^^And if they don't agree? Should the husband just get the wife pregnant anyway?
I'm just curious.
well as a Muslim i believe that a child come in to this world if ALLAHTALA wants no matter what kind of birth control a person is using, i know so many couples who have stories of being on birth control but the wife still got pregnant, and i personally know these people i am not talking about idhar udhar ki stories, but if someone wants to use it then it should be both husband and wife's decision, because if your husband don't know you are on a pill and finds out later it might create problem for couple's life in later years.
Re: i know this is a embrassing questionn but i need help!
btw, what are the chances of getting pregnant on the first night???
Re: i know this is a embrassing questionn but i need help!
Whatever you do, don't talk to him about using condoms at this stage. He might already have some preconceived notions about your upbrining in Amreeka and if you mention condom he would think you are an expert. I know that is not the case but someone living in Pakistan might take it the wrong way. Is it really important to have sex the first night. Just talk to him on the wedding night and make him wait a couple of days until he finds the condoms. If he is really out of control then just do everything with him except intercourse. I am sure after a couple of hands, he will calm down.
Re: i know this is a embrassing questionn but i need help!
So you want a wife to hit her husband? 
Are we talking about sneaking them in secretly?
Re: i know this is a embrassing questionn but i need help!
I agree to what funguy said : If i were getting married to someone in Pak, i would NOT talk to him about it first. IF you dont want to have kids yet, talk to him about it after the wedding. Do not offer him any condoms taht you take from here. He may get some wierd notions about you being all azaad and what not. Talk to him about it after the wedding, its not like you have to have sex the very first night. I am sure, since you are getting married to him, he is a reasonable enough of a man that your parents chose him for you.
Do not talk to him before the wedding about this. And even after the event, try to limit what you say it and how you say it until he gets to know you better. Cultural differences bhi koi cheez hotay hain.
Re: i know this is a embrassing questionn but i need help!
^^And if they don't agree? Should the husband just get the wife pregnant anyway?
I'm just curious.
that would be pretty ****ty of the husband, frankly.
Re: i know this is a embrassing questionn but i need help!
Do not talk to him before the wedding about this. And even after the event, try to limit what you say it and how you say it until he gets to know you better. Cultural differences bhi koi cheez hotay hain.
seriously though, she's marrying him! for better or worse, they're going to spend their lives together. there are ways of discussing birth control and babies without it being lewd and seeming like she's "fast". it can even be as simple as, "when do you think you would like to have kids? because i would love to in the future, in a few years, but i'm not ready for them right now and i was wondering what you think about that?". it doesn't have to be all "if you dont wear a condom, you're an ass and we're never going to get jiggy with it ever".
ideally, the whole kids talk should have taken place before they decided to get married to avoid this whole mess in the first place-- even if it was just to get a sense of what the other person's expectations are.
Re: i know this is a embrassing questionn but i need help!
SGC, trust me when i say this : a guy in pakistan may not have the same outlook as a guy raised abroad. I am not saying dont discuss it when you are married, just dont do it before the wedding if he doesnt bring it up. Frankly, the whole world is not like US/Canada/UK. People are different in differnt countries/cultures and they have different perceptions of things. I have seen atleast one person's life made hell due to a similiar situation like this. Her WHOLE family in Pakistan just assumes that since she has spent considerable amount of time abroad, she knows everything and is too "advanced". And i know for a fact she is much better than the girls in Pak. We know what some of them are capable of.
Re: i know this is a embrassing questionn but i need help!
btw, what are the chances of getting pregnant on the first night???
chances equal to any other night.
Re: i know this is a embrassing questionn but i need help!
u cant ask him or talk to him about it but u can have sex w. him? come on its the yr 2007 and yes it might be embarrassing but u have no other choice.
1. buy them from here obviously its no problem here just take them with you and make him wear it.
2. if u want him to get it there, just go to a reputable shop not just some small corner store. ask if they have any foreign made ones.
make sure its new and not somethng that has been sittin in his wallet for a long time!!
always as backup just go on the pill if u can.
dont be embarressed or scared. its that or have a kid?! come on which one outweights the ohter?!?!?
Re: i know this is a embrassing questionn but i need help!
dont talk to him abut this and even after the event?? u dont have to have sex on ur wedding nite??? oh my god are u for real? what guy would ever go along with that?
i cant ppl even think like this in this day and age. no wonder ppl have kids and are miserable and dont even want them but are stuck cuz no one says anything...my motto is ...."if u are ready to have sex...then u should be ready to talk about it"
I agree to what funguy said : If i were getting married to someone in Pak, i would NOT talk to him about it first. IF you dont want to have kids yet, talk to him about it after the wedding. Do not offer him any condoms taht you take from here. He may get some wierd notions about you being all azaad and what not. Talk to him about it after the wedding, its not like you have to have sex the very first night. I am sure, since you are getting married to him, he is a reasonable enough of a man that your parents chose him for you.
Do not talk to him before the wedding about this. And even after the event, try to limit what you say it and how you say it until he gets to know you better. Cultural differences bhi koi cheez hotay hain.
Re: i know this is a embrassing questionn but i need help!
and 1 more thing...just cuz i think some of these respones are just crazy.....if he thinks ur "azaad" just cuz u mention birth control....well i feel really bad cuz hes a backwards loser anyways, this should be discussed before marriage not after ....hwat are u gonna do once u sign the paper? say ohhh man now we do not agree on anything....and just suffer? sounds like a lovely life.
Re: i know this is a embrassing questionn but i need help!
SGC, trust me when i say this : a guy in pakistan may not have the same outlook as a guy raised abroad. I am not saying dont discuss it when you are married, just dont do it before the wedding if he doesnt bring it up. Frankly, the whole world is not like US/Canada/UK. People are different in differnt countries/cultures and they have different perceptions of things. I have seen atleast one person's life made hell due to a similiar situation like this. Her WHOLE family in Pakistan just assumes that since she has spent considerable amount of time abroad, she knows everything and is too "advanced". And i know for a fact she is much better than the girls in Pak. We know what some of them are capable of.
ok, so compromise- go on the pill so you're protected on your wedding night, and then when you get around to discussing it, you can decide together if you want to continue on the pill or not. better to be safe than sorry!
honestly though, the idea that she cant discuss it with him at all before marriage still bothers me- pakistan or no pakistan, there is a certain level of intimacy associated with marrying someone and it goes beyond the bedroom and i think people really need to be comfortable with it and agree to certain things before agreeing to marry each other.