What is it with people who keep insisting? I think its more of a desi thing cos when people say no they don’t really mean no and just say it so they don’t come across too anxious or the ‘koi kya sochay ga’ factor. For example when offered something to eat or drink, the first response is usually a ‘no thanks’ and then when the one offering insists a couple of time they change their mind and accept. Look like it is considered civil if you turn down the offer the first time even if you don’t really mean it.
A few years ago I used to work about 15 minutes away from home so I would walk it in the morning particularly when the weather was pleasant. Now these ladies who were my mum’s friends happened to drive by and pulled over for me offering a ride. I politely declined only because I really didn’t want a ride. If I did I would have even stopped their car and asked for one. So they started with their oh please come on let us drop you, so I tell them that I really want to walk and that’s why I’m on the road to start with, but no! They won’t listen. They keep insisting until I finally give up and get in the car. Idiots. Ruined my morning walk.
Now at work my boss is always trying to feed me. No matter how many times I decline he is always dangling around with more and more food. That’s really sweet of him but it annoys the hell out of me. Everday it’s the same story. At times I even feel like I’m being rude but he just doesn’t get it. No reason in the world works in getting him to stop offering food. If I tell him I’m not hungry he brings it back an hour later, if I say I’m trying to cut my calories he says u don’t need to cut any calories or lose weight, ur fine. So I end up with the largest servings of food on my plate. I have even thrown away food in the trash can. That makes me feel awful.
But really how do you deal with such people who just cannot take a no??? Now while all you sillies make a mess of this thread I have to eat up the icecream he zabardasti left me a few minutes ago before it melts on my desk .
^hahaha...i read that verizon..although im glad you deleted...its wasnt one of your original stories!
I used to think it was a desi thing too, but its soo not, i once had my driving instructer try to feed me grapes when i was doing 60 mph in a country lane. He said it would make me a better driver and would not stop offering until i did an emergancy brake and told him i was allergic to grapes! i mean...what else can you say?
Naa-shukray logoN ki kammi nahee duniya may. Femme, if the same people wouldn't be doing what they are doing, you would be writing about how rude and impolite desis are. Kabhi khush naa hona.
FF ji, have you ever thought that it could actually be your fault for not being too “clear”. If you have trouble saying NO, don’t blame others for your lack of clarity and cogency. I often see people on my subway ride to work who want to engage me in a talk, and I tell them (unless you know why) that I am busy reading my newspaper.
Here’s what you need to say to those aunities:
“I like walking to work and if I wanted to drive to work, I have my own car and I could have driven. Thanks for the offer however.”
Danday, I can’t meet you for drinks after work today. I had one too many at lunch with the birthday boy.
my god, this is a pet peeve or what. If i offer someone something, an they refuse, i’ll follow with a ‘u sure’? a nod, an its settled. Unfortunately, my mum gets annoyed when i do the same with our guests. :halo:
mum does not take no for an answer. i feel sorry for the guests sometimes, what if they just had a pizza fer example, an then forced to eat a whole plate of haleem or whatever on top? These customs hard to get sometimes.
My mom does the same to this day. She will make me eat twice as I would normally eat and I am such a chicken in front of her that I can't say no. I would mumble, 'naee ammi, buhat khaa liya...' laikin majaal hay koi asar hau.
