Thank you so much for your words. I didn't want to discuss it here but I've told u guys quite a lot so why not share one more thing: Well, the shaadi question raised 4 days back when I got this 'rishta' stuff from some family friends of my step-mom. My father and brother were offended by it as they believe that I'm too young to get married. I mean, my plan is to get Masters degree first and then think of marriage and stuff. I wanna be independent so the rishta thing wasn't that important to me. Anyway, I didn't really like their view of 'me being too young'. Was I not young when I used to tie my sisters hair? Was I not too young when I used to make grocery lists at age 12? Was I not young when I used to shop for my sisters school uniform and school books? Was I not young when I used to attend my sister's parent-teacher meeting? Was I not young when I started peeling vegetables? Was I not young when I used to stay awake so that my sister could sleep before me as she had the habit of sleeping while hugging mummy? Did anyone ever hug me? Did anyone ever think if I'm asleep or crying in my bed! Now they think I'm young. How could they forget those times! Nobody remembers that stuff at all.
But Allah Ta'lah swt will always remember. :)
Yes, you were young when life changed dramatically for you and you were made to do all those things. May Allah Ta'lah swt reward you for your efforts, Inshallah.
You need to find ways to stay thinking positive and happy now. If you feel like crying in your room at night again - make a dua for your Mother, which she will receive and pray until you fall asleep. You are 21 now, and you will get your Masters degree by 23 - so still young! Lol. If marriage feels to early then you can continue with studies more or get a job until you feel ready. But be patient with Dad and Brother. Be proud of what you have achieved as you are such a smart student, Marshallah and you still managed to study through a difficult time.
Even though your Step-Mom and you have awkward, quiet moments together, still be patient and remain polite to her. If she doesn't make conversations or gives one-word answers than don't feel you have to keep the conversation going as it will just make you feel more awkward. Just enjoy a quiet trip in the car. Prehaps one day your Step-Mom will feel pleasure in her heart for you and the patience you always showed her. :)
Allah loves those who are patient. (A’le-Imraan 3/146)