So a colleague and I were having lunch and talking about an upcoming work event we’re having and Im organizing. I was venting my frustration about another colleague thats just not cooperating……and she made a comment about how cute he is. I agreed, he is cute (no, he really is cute ).
However, the fact of the matter is he has a girlfriend. And that alone should be enough of a deterrence for women but my co-worker says “I dont see a ring and if there is no ring…he is free for any woman to grab”.
This is a Maury Povich show in the making and just an example of course.
What do you guys think? Is a girlfriend/boyfriend enough to deter the opposite sex?
**There is no value of such relationship. **Never has been and never will be despite anyone trying to make it at the same level as committed as marriage.
BF/GF relationship is over-rated in this regard.
Come on. People!
If you are bf/gf. Does not mean anything whatsoever in terms of you being committed to that person.
**If you were so concerned **about not getting other person be grabbed by someone else, then you would have “married” the person for showing your commitment.
Tough! ** Let other person grab your gf/bf. and be happy!
In other words, if you are not man or woman enough to grab that person, move over.
**
The problem there is that if they really** tend to take it to the marriage level**, then what is holding up them to get married?
I know if this were a woman, she could be given benefit of doubt for not being able to make this relationship converted in to marriage, but for a man to use this analogy is simply unrealistic even in some strict societies.
‘Considering’ is not enough.
“Oh! I am thinking to get married to you..but not sure yet!”
It is not a committed relationship what I am trying to get at.
bf/gf relationship is not a committed relationship by any means.
Maybe they arent ready or the man doesnt know if she is the one or something.
What about all of those people who end up in 5 year long relationships, date forever and do everything before marriage? What about them? Are they less committed?
Maybe they arent ready or the man doesnt know if she is the one or something.
If they aren't ready or man does not know if she is the right one then why should he not let anyone else to make a move on her??
What about all of those people who end up in 5 year long relationships, date forever and do everything before marriage? What about them?** Are they less committed?**
Yes.
This kind of long relationship is actually more ridiculous and should be taken as that both individuals are not sure about each other.
And they are open for anyone to grab any one of them.
No one has a right on other. No one should blame other or cry/complain other person, for being grabbed by a third person.
^Whoosh.......It still answers the question, Diwana.
There are people who are not deterred from hitting on somebody's husband/wife........the married status and blingiest ring doesn't even hold em back...............being someone's GF/BF would hold even lesser value.
One may not have been given a ring.........but it's not that hard to take if off either.
It would be great if being in a relationship with someone (not necessarily marriage) ...and ring or no ring....would be enough to deter the opposite sex..............but we live in the real world..............and we know that it's not always enough.
LOL........even in high school....the kids know it's "messed-up" to go after someone else's girl/guy.....and at that stage....very rarely do you see rings signifying some sort of commitment.
Some people don't even consider marriage as a deal breaker. I mean if they are attracted to a young, hot, human of the opposite sex why should they not pursue that person, I mean yeah they are married and all, it's not like HIV it's not contagious, it's just marriage, it's not like they are dead lol.
Some people don't even consider marriage as a deal breaker. I mean if they are attracted to a young, hot, human of the opposite sex why should they not pursue that person, I mean yeah they are married and all, it's not like HIV it's not contagious, it's just marriage, it's not like they are dead lol.
Exactly. That's the point I was trying to make as well.
The presence or absence of a ring may not deter a person who is adamant to win you over.
Heck......the ring itself........can even hold little value to the one wearing it.....if the person can't fight temptation......they'll find a way to cheat.
Did I just compare marriage to a sexually transmitted disease? No I think I compared it to death lol. Every man dies a little after signing his nikkahnama lol.
Exactly. That's the point I was trying to make as well.
The presence or absence of a ring may not deter a person who is adamant to win you over.
Heck......the ring itself........can even hold little value to the one wearing it.....if the person can't fight temptation......they'll find a way to cheat.
You are right, If someone wants to do something immoral, they will find an excuse or make one up.
^Whoosh.......It still answers the question, Diwana.
There are people who are not deterred from hitting on somebody's husband/wife........the married status and blingiest ring doesn't even hold em back...............being someone's GF/BF would hold even lesser value.
One may not have been given a ring.........but it's not that hard to take if off either.
It would be great if being in a relationship with someone (not necessarily marriage) ...and ring or no ring....would be enough to deter the opposite sex..............but we live in the real world..............and we know that it's not always enough.
LOL........even in high school....the kids know it's "messed-up" to go after someone else's girl/guy.....and at that stage....very rarely do you see rings signifying some sort of commitment.
Whoosh, just answering question without understanding question is not enough RV. The question is not about married people getting hit. Different scenario. Happy to explain when it is needed.
If you go back, my post was after canadiandesigirl (CDG) and I focued on Reha's question and CDG post where she thought being gf/bf should be enough to deter. Not that is not true.
RV and DB, if the person knows that other person is married and still hits on that person, than if the person knowlingly hits on someone who is not married.
"Not the same as if the person knowingly hits on someone who is not married."
Diwana...............marriage is the only legal commitment in Islam.........I get that.
And according to Islam........GF/BF relationship holds zilch value.
^And if you're going by that premise......than you might say that the absence of a marriage makes the individual "fair game."
BUT........what me and DB are saying is that EVEN A MARRIAGE (which is considered halal, sacred, and has legal worth) is not enough to deter someone.............so how much of a deterrence would a lesser relationship be? It wouldn't.
…and she made a comment about how cute he is. I agreed, he is cute (no, he really is cute 
).
