ok…so if you guys remember me…i have made a lot of topics here about my past crushes, i tend to have a lot of crushes on people but funny thing is, instead of having crushes on real people, i have crushes on tv people, not just actors but tv hosts also…like news channels hosts…etc.
anyways…i never had a crush on anyone based on their looks, there are difference things that attracts in me in people, like their sense of humor, their intelligence, their religiousness…or their patriotism…but hardly anyone’s looks.
so…i always thought when i will be getting married, or get introduced to a guy who could be my potential rishta i will not have any trouble falling for him, because there isn’t anything particular i look in the guy…just gerneral goodness is alright for me.
about couple of weeks ago, i was introduced to a guy who was interested in sending a proposal for me…he wanted to talk to me for a little bit so he can get to know me, so both of us can decide about each other. i started talking to him online…and so far it went alright. the guy seems decent…he is religious enough for me…has zero sense of humor… doesn’t have striking intelligence, but not dumb either.
the problem is, even after talking to him for about two weeks…i have NO feelings for him.
don’t get me wrong here. i wasn’t planning on falling in love with him during this time, but i was expecting something, anything at all…but when ever i talk to him, i just feel flat…no feelings no emotional at all. sometimes i even get bored talking to him.
so strategically he isn’t a bad guy at all…he looks alright…he talks decent…he earns alright. i can’t exactly comeup with a reason to say no to him. but but i just don’t get attracted toward him AT ALL. i don’t think about him during the day…i don’t look fwd to my time talking to him…i don’t feel bad when he said he has to go. what should i do?? my friends are telling me that i might develope feelings for him later. but what if i don’t?
so a little help here. tell me what i should do…and for the record…the guys seems interested in me. and that’s another problem. i don’t want to to continue talking to him, if he shows interest in me, and i don’t find any interest in him, because then I will feel bad if i said NO. so i want to decide now…before he falls for me.
No but seriously though in a situation like this where you are required to form an opinion and make a major decision its difficult to develop the sort of feelings you are talking about . However thats different from if the guy is boring you to death which seems to be the case , in which case you already know the answer !***
No but seriously though in a situation like this where you are required to form an opinion and make a major decision its difficult to develop the sort of feelings you are talking about . However thats different from if the guy is boring you to death which seems to be the case , in which case you already know the answer !***
If you're not attracted to him in the slightest and you dont think that will change in the future...end it.
Attraction is not everything but it is something. And what I am talking about is not even physical attraction necessarily, more chemistry. If you two dont have good chemistry where the conversations are at least interesting and you have a good time together...what is the point?
If you're already bored with him and don't look forward to talking to him, it's not a good sign. This usually doesn't happen until a few years of marriage.
you guys are right, and even i know the answer, but what scares me that, what if i never be able to find an actual soul mate kinda of a guy, and what if i regret saying no for him in next few years when i am too old :( and no more rishtas around.
life is way to complicated :/
^ then you will have to just compromise a little....lower your standards a bit.....and u have a mate (btw i don't think anything like a soul mate exists)
if u first lose ur attitude then might b one day u will find your soul mate, of course soul mate still exist around you somewhere …dont giveup , dont lose ur heart still a long way to go …***
1) you may have some insecurities as most of the girls have before marriage.........
2) may be u did not like something about him & giving satisfaction to you heart that he is earning good, he is nice & all......
3) he is not actually a guy u r exactly looking for thats why u dont get attracted towards him.......
well i had (and still HAVE) the same feelings for my fiance ..i thought that i am not attracted towards him,i didnt enjoy talking to him,if he called me i waited when will the call end up etc etc…but one thing i have learned now,if itz not someone u really love then rest is all the same…
I agree with everyone. On top of that, if you don't reciprocate his feelings then don't continue this either, because it'll seem like you're leading him on. We all know it's horrid to lead someone on. If you're using him as a second best or an insurance because you're so scared of what life might have in store for you, then that's pretty horrid too /=
yeah i have to and itz pretty normal here in our culture..u love someone,u dun marry him due to XYZ reason and u end up marrying someone else u r not attracted to..
The problem is most of the sweet talking, pampering, caring & all time available guys are good for nothing in their practical life neither are co operative partners. So you have to make a choice.... wesay i wud marry this guy and keep someone else for good chit chat :D whats wrong in that ;)
but funny thing is, instead of having crushes on real people, i have crushes on tv people, not just actors but tv hosts also…like news channels hosts…etc.
..i thought that i am not attracted towards him,i didnt enjoy talking to him,if he called me i waited when will the call end up etc etc…but one thing i have learned now,if itz not someone u really love then rest is all the same…