I don't think it's fair to ask for extending the family when the husband is jobless....I mean where was she few years ago? Women can have babies even after the age of 45 so what's the rush?
I don't think it's a bad idea at all for them to consider trying now since if she does get pregnant and need help around the house he will be avaliable to help her through the chores. My husband is a master's student and I work so it worked out perfect for us because he can watch the baby so we don't have to pay for babysitting and he helps me out by doing few chores in the house. I think every couple is different but if she is making decent money and can afford to be on maternity leave for few months then they should consider this a good time! just my opinion :)
they should not have waited this long to have a baby, but there may have been other issues which we are not aware of. I think the husband is right in not wanting to start a family while he is jobless. She should wait til he finds a job since he is willing to start soon after. I personally feel that no guy would want to have a family if he cant provide for them.
We don't know what is going through his mind and the only way you'll know that or more so your friend will find that out is by speaking to him and discussing the reasons why !
Re: your friend's biological clock...this varies from woman to woman.
Your friend will also have to consider that she may have to take time off work for her pregnancy and depending on where she lives, maternity pay may not cover all their outgoings!
The wife needs to let him know that he does not need to feel insecure about himself, if they have a baby during his jobless period. And on the other hand the husband needs to be supportive in coming up with a proper time to conceive. They both should give a little more to their relationship and to one another. There will never be a "perfect" time to have a child, however, talking through it, and bringing up any doubts you may have can change a lot.
If she keeps on arguing with him over this, they’re gonna have really big problems! She needs to understand the man is already stressed about his job… he might not say it to her but when someone loses their job, it does have a huge impact on them. Just last week I was at the EGFevent to represent my college and this event was organised for people who were made redundant by Dell and the associated companies. Over 3000 people were invited, ~2000 of whom turned up …and Man, were they depressed or what!!!
Having a baby at this time is only a good idea if the husband is likely to find a job within the next 9 months. But again… its understandable that he doesn’t want to get into this given his present psychological state.
Except that if he's been making these excuses for a WHILE, its kind of lame. And he's a lawyer. He'll find work SOMEWHERE if he tries hard enough. Worse comes to worst, he can teach.
Amazing. When you pressure a woman into having kids, the guy is a *******. But when you attempt to pressure a man into having kids he is nuts, or got mental issues.
Seriously, where do you all live? I would love to see how you all precieve reality.
Sometimes the sheer hypocrasy on this website baffles me.
let me state for the record that she is also a lawyer and she makes enough for him to stay at home and raise a child. (if need be - they are not going to be on the streets)
Amazing. When you pressure a woman into having kids, the guy is a *******. But when you attempt to pressure a man into having kids he is nuts, or got mental issues.
Seriously, where do you all live? I would love to see how you all precieve reality.
Sometimes the sheer hypocrasy on this website baffles me.
CM - you can can see it both ways. If she lost her job - no one would understand her desire to find another job before she had a baby. It's okay for men to be that focused on their career alone while a woman has to look at other things in life. hypocritical (yes indeed)