seriously its difficult enough in pak as it is, and im sick of asking him to take me shopping/out, he will say yes of course, but will forget, or just wont bother. have to literally ask and ask and ask. he never asks himself do u need anything…im sick of feeling like a begger. and before u guys say `go urself and go shoppng, my family here isnt liberal type, i need a guy to go with me. family rules. and i prefer husband taking me. its not that someone else cant, i WANT husband to. but he doesnt see the big deal.
so i asked again today and he replied ok jan maybe later or tomrw…as usual fobbed me off. so i replied back saying forget it, im sick of begging dont bother if your not in terested il go with someone else.
and does he com running home whenhe saw that text?
NO.
tired and just want a good cry. and someone who will understand so gs guys please dont put me down.
Re: husband has no interest in going out with wife.
why shouldn't we? you could be living in UK right now looking for a job but no, you went back to Pakistan knowing that you would be miserable.
You have to suck it up and stop complaining.
Re: husband has no interest in going out with wife.
Guys aren’t into shopping, thought it was common knowledge. Its very tedious hanging around and seeing women ‘‘window’’ shop :no: Don’t think he’s doing anything unnatural but that’s just me!
Re: husband has no interest in going out with wife.
Baar baar aik hee baat kehne se..he wont listen to you ever..!
Who made the rules that a male has to accompany a female every time she goes out..??.Does a male chaperone accompany your MIL when she goes to work...??
Not that it will matter what I say,but stop complaining about everything.If the spouse or things in a marriage are not acc to what you like,you try to fix them or evolve accordingly.Rather than just saying that Pakistan is a crappy place to live and any other country is not...!!The issue is not the country.The issue is you.
Re: husband has no interest in going out with wife.
at least he called you jan...
jan hai tu jahaan hai, warna har cheez bejan hai
i hope you say this to your 'jaan' vaise is lafz-e-'jaan' men bhii mard Hazraat kanjoosii farmaate haiN...are bhai, jaan ke saath kuchh aur bhii lagaa diyaa kareN jaise... jaan-e-man, jaan-e-bahaar, jaan-e-aarzoo, jaan e azeez [yeh azeez koi azeez bhai nahiiN haiN] jaan e tamannaa, jaan-e-gulzaar, jaan e chaman etc :)
Re: husband has no interest in going out with wife.
Agree, at least you called you jaan.
And no she isn't better off living in U.K without her husband. She is better off living in Pakistan where her husband is. Tough yes, impossible.. no. People complain when the guy doesn't live with the wife, and goes to work abroad... and they complain when the husband lives with the wife. Never happy huh???
Khair Nadz, most men are like that. My husband hates going to shopping too with me. Of course I can go alone and I do but maybe you should talk to him and tell him that sometimes, its nice to enjoy each other's company going out shopping, doing things that couples enjoy.
Re: husband has no interest in going out with wife.
He should take you shopping. Seriously, sometimes what husbands don’t get is that we as wifes who stay home all day everyday get SICK OF IT!
Taking you out for dinner or shopping is the least he can do. My husband always makes an effort to take me out at least twice a week as he knows I’m home all day with our daughter and cooking and cleaning is all I do. I feel like I deserve a break. A dinner outside or a trip to the mall is that break I need. I give him fresh food on the table every single evening, he gets ironed clothes hung and ready to wear every single morning so taking care of my needs is the least he can do. And he does
Re: husband has no interest in going out with wife.
LOL....so you're adult enough to give birth to 2 children but not adult enough to go out on your own.
I'm curious....what would happen if you chose to break this "family rule"? Are they going to spank you?
Actually in some places of Pak it's considered very bad to go to the bazaar without a mehram. I believe she lives in Peshawar, it's not like Lahore or Khi, they're very strict over there. I wouldn't risk going shopping alone in Peshawar ever.
Re: husband has no interest in going out with wife.
Actually in some places of Pak it's considered very bad to go to the bazaar without a mehram. I believe she lives in Peshawar, it's not like Lahore or Khi, they're very strict over there. I wouldn't risk going shopping alone in Peshawar ever.
Ah I see. Well, even with this, OP herself admits that she doesn't want to go out with anyone else. And her husband has made it clear to her that he doesn't want to go with her. Based on her statement below, she CHOOSES not go go out and uses her husband an an excuse. And then she gets even more upset when the husband doesn't fall for her emotional tactics (ie. doesn't run home just b/c she sends him a dramatic text).
The issue of not being able to go out is her own choice. The issue of her husband not wanting to spend time with her....that's a legitimate reason to be upset...BUT in Nadz's case....nothing new. She keeps having this expectation that her husband and/or MIL is going to change....and they're not.
i prefer husband taking me. its not that someone else cant, i WANT husband to..
Re: husband has no interest in going out with wife.
[quote="WendyDarling, post:36, topic:266516"]
Actually in some places of Pak it's considered very bad to go to the bazaar without a mehram. I believe she lives in Peshawar, it's not like Lahore or Khi, they're very strict over there. I wouldn't risk going shopping alone in Peshawar ever.
my family women go out in the day time. its not an issue. they also drive alone at times. there are obviously some constraints but its not at all as bad as nadzz makes it out to be, esp with regards to shopping ( if u can brave the heat)
nadz try to adjust yourself. go with some1 else yaar. life is too short.
Re: husband has no interest in going out with wife.
Do you drive? You could offer to drive on your outing trips, or offer to buy him something he's been wanting to get. You have to make it fun and easy for him, because he isn't going to move his tired(assuming he's had a hard day at work) ass just because you're whining.
You don't always have to take him shopping. You can take your nand to the market as she's always at your place. This will give you the much needed bonding time with your sister-in-law.
This way you won't feel bad when your husband tells you to hurry at the market and he won't feel bad cause you won't be whining when he tells you to move a bit faster.
Re: husband has no interest in going out with wife.
i think going for shopping in peshawar is veryyyy easy compared to karachi where u have to stay alert for dakus,n dont wear original gold,dont take cellfones etc…
that is not the case in peshawar…i went for several times and we have made many “girls only” trips…many times i went alone too…
waisay i’ve never been to lahore so i dont know much about it
khair what i meant is its not that peshawar its family traditions n preferences…most of the families doesnt allow their spouse to go alone n most of them do…
for OP dont get upset u can go with ur SIL or your own mom or sis n enjoy shopping with them if husband doesnt want
Re: husband has no interest in going out with wife.
My MIL is from Peshawar.She has spent her entire childhood there and although she moved to Punjab after getting married,her sisters are still settled there.I do understand the concept of parda amongst Pathans is strict as compared to Punjabis and preferably it is better to be accompanied by a male.But I also know that my MIL and her sisters did not need a male figure with them ALL the time.
My husband gets all kinds of aches and pains once we step in a departmental store...tummy ache,headache even joints aches...Reason being he hates that.I could sit and complain about it all my life,but I have evolved accordingly.There are other things we can do together rather than me nagging him every single day to take me out for shopping.He will start despising me for that and avoid me and maybe deliberately not take me out.
To the OP a sincere advice would be to be a lil accommodating and understanding and quit complaining all the time.I do think he should take you out,if not for shopping maybe just for a drive or whatever they go out for in Peshawar.But you need to change your mindset first...!!
Once you do that you will start seeing lesser flaws in every living soul around you and that would make your life and marriage so easy.
Re: husband has no interest in going out with wife.
After reading all this feeling so lucky huby n me enjoy shopping together even my mil says tht she will go for shopping only wth my huby because other sons keep shouting maa jaldi karo
Seriously, sometimes what husbands don’t get is that we as wifes who stay home all day everyday get SICK OF IT!
And he does 
