We often talk about wanting our partner to be goodlooking, smart, rich, educated, loving, etc etc but i never hear about people wanting intelligence or intellect. Is that not important?
For me intellectual compatibility is very important, everything else you can figure out abt the prospect but in order to test their intelligence n intellect you would have to talk to them couple of times which doesnt really happen. So that does make me wonder but oh well hope for the best :D.
Re: How Vital is Intellectual Compatibility?
Very important. But if you are open-minded, non-negative, patient, and most importantly, don't mind teaching & learning, then just the process of filling the intellectual gap could prove a worthwhile experience for a life time.
Re: How Vital is Intellectual Compatibility?
Its very important .. ..
but for me .. I don't expect someone to be exactly like me .. .. It would not give me a charm in life .. .. like i always say ..w hats the point if i like vanila ice cream and she likes it too then throughout my life we will eat only vanilla .. but what if she likes vanilla, I like strawberry .. we can have tasted lots of other flavors as well .. :) .. ..
The kind a guy i am .. I like challenges, I would love to learn her mentality, intellectual level, her approaches .. but at the same time I KNOW that she is not gonna do that .. so a new charm for me .. :p ..
Re: How Vital is Intellectual Compatibility?
But if you are open-minded, non-negative, patient, and most importantly, don't mind teaching & learning, then just the process of filling the intellectual gap could prove a worthwhile experience for a life time.
True. But i find myself very impatient with such people and i know its such a bad thing :(.
Re: How Vital is Intellectual Compatibility?
True. But i find myself very impatient with such people and i know its such a bad thing :(.
Who are such people? :--p
Re: How Vital is Intellectual Compatibility?
Its very important .. ..
but for me .. I don't expect someone to be exactly like me .. .. It would not give me a charm in life .. .. like i always say ..w hats the point if i like vanila ice cream and she likes it too then throughout my life we will eat only vanilla .. but what if she likes vanilla, I like strawberry .. we can have tasted lots of other flavors as well .. :) .. ..
Intellectual Compatibility is alot more about similiar speed of understanding, amount of knowledge and very less about similarity of opinions. One must be able to have an interesting and stimulating conversation with their partner and vice versa.
Re: How Vital is Intellectual Compatibility?
Who are such people? :--p
Like slow people who are the last to get the joke or the sarcasm and even generally their approach to life is so dull and slow. I come to experience such people in my day to day life whether me the guy at the shop who is too dumb to figure out what it is you are looking for or even your tailor who fails to see what he has done wrong or a friend who thinks i am too stupid to not understand what she is upto. Lolz!
Re: How Vital is Intellectual Compatibility?
I feel it more interesting if some person has different mentality. it gives me more insight and its easier for me to understand next prson. if she would be of same mentality I would run out of topics to discuss ..
Intellectual Compatibility is alot more about similiar speed of understanding, amount of knowledge and very less about similarity of opinions. One must be able to have an interesting and stimulating conversation with their partner and vice versa.
Re: How Vital is Intellectual Compatibility?
Like slow people who are the last to get the joke or the sarcasm and even generally their approach to life is so dull and slow. I come to experience such people in my day to day life whether me the guy at the shop who is too dumb to figure out what it is you are looking for or even your tailor who fails to see what he has done wrong or a friend who thinks i am too stupid to not understand what she is upto. Lolz!
Ok. First things first! No assumptions! You never know someone unless you fully know them, and even then you don't know. Even the "fast" ones among us could be intellectually bankrupt.
Re: How Vital is Intellectual Compatibility?
True that .. .. most of the "hypothetical" assumptions are based on those "theoretical" information which most of the people whine about when it comes to marriage.
Ok. First things first! No assumptions! You never know someone unless you fully know them, and even then you don't know. Even the "fast" ones among us could be intellectually bankrupt.
Re: How Vital is Intellectual Compatibility?
Is that not important?
I don't think so. I know people that are married to total nerds and intellectual GURU in their fields. They could care less. Infact probably glad their spouse doesn't have an opinion about what they are working on. I think your personalities have to mesh though.
Re: How Vital is Intellectual Compatibility?
I feel it more interesting if some person has different mentality. it gives me more insight and its easier for me to understand next prson. if she would be of same mentality I would run out of topics to discuss ..
that's an interesting approach i must say :).
Ok. First things first! No assumptions! You never know someone unless you fully know them, and even then you don't know. Even the "fast" ones among us could be intellectually bankrupt.
Hmm rite?! :p
Re: How Vital is Intellectual Compatibility?
probably thats their "intellectual computability" that both of them don't care what other is doing .. :p
I don't think so. I know people that are married to total nerds and intellectual GURU in their fields. They could care less. Infact probably glad their spouse doesn't have an opinion about what they are working on. I think your personalities have to mesh though.
Re: How Vital is Intellectual Compatibility?
I don't think so. I know people that are married to total nerds and intellectual GURU in their fields. They could care less. Infact probably glad their spouse doesn't have an opinion about what they are working on. I think your personalities have to mesh though.
I m glad.
Would love to hear more from married people.
Re: How Vital is Intellectual Compatibility?
that's an interesting approach i must say :).
Hmm rite?! :p
I gave the analogy of "vanila"-"strawberry" - I din know that people will take it literally :) ..
Re: How Vital is Intellectual Compatibility?
I m glad.
Would love to hear more from married people.
I am a married people also. So you can take most of what I say as the complete truth. Thanks.
Re: How Vital is Intellectual Compatibility?
I think it's important to an extent but the most important thing should be whether or not you can carry on a conversation with that person and how comfortable you feel with him/her..........Personally for us i think both me and hubby have the same intellect level (if that makes sense) but there are still things that i learn from him and vice versa............in the end it just comes down the personalities being compatible with one another
Re: How Vital is Intellectual Compatibility?
I think it's important to an extent but the most important thing should be whether or not you can carry on a conversation with that person and how comfortable you feel with him/her..........Personally for us i think both me and hubby have the same intellect level (if that makes sense) but there are still things that i learn from him and vice versa............in the end it just comes down the personalities being compatible with one another
I would say excellent point .. .. thats what i meant to say .. .. I believe a persons "personality" grows through out his life .. earlier, its his parents/family who helps to make him learn, observe thing. when he/she starts his/her life then i beleive its his/her partner.
Not every single person has 100% exposure of life .. .. there would be lots of flaws and those flaws would be source of new personality grooming for me .. :) ..
The most important thing that i believe should be .. is Willing to compromise. In arrange marriage, its obvious case .. but in love marriage - you gotta develop it. In simple words, its the Acceptance of disagreements .. ..
Re: How Vital is Intellectual Compatibility?
We often talk about wanting our partner to be goodlooking, smart, rich, educated, loving, etc etc but i never hear about people wanting intelligence or intellect. Is that not important?
For me intellectual compatibility is very important, everything else you can figure out abt the prospect but in order to test their intelligence n intellect you would have to talk to them couple of times which doesnt really happen. So that does make me wonder but oh well hope for the best :D.
There is a certain minimum level of 'intellect' that i would wish in my life partner....somewhere near to what i think i have.....too much gap and it would be a mismatch..
level of intellect and personality differences are separate things....people could be equally intelligent but their personality totally opposite to what you wish ....
so...i think these are two separate things...personality and intellect
and it takes some time to spend/talk with other person to comprehend their level of intellect and personality..not just by talking couple of times..
P.S......coming back to the real world.....finding ideal intellect+personality does have a very very less probability :D
Re: How Vital is Intellectual Compatibility?
P.S......coming back to the real world.....finding ideal intellect+personality does have a very very less probability :D
lol that's why you have to comprimise with your SO but you can find someone that has both intellect+personality if you look really hard :)