Re: How to have beatuful and healthy baby?
Lmao! You are one crazy woman
Oh Wait! it is a mod free month right 
Re: How to have beatuful and healthy baby?
OP is specifically concerned about the complexion of her child. Not itās overall health, not ābeautyāā¦the COLOR OF ITS SKIN.
And what is beauty anyway? Every parent thinks their child is beautiful. Hell, Iām convinced my 3 boys are the most handsome, good looking kids to walk this planet, Iāve been quite blessed with gorgeous children IMOā¦but thatās MY opinion. Someone else might look at them and think āMeh..theyāre okā. Isnāt it all subjective?
To be preoccupied with the color of the childās skin, and asking for specific remedies to alter what Allah SWT has already created is downright shameful if you ask me. As someone who struggled for years to conceive, had multiple miscarriages and then fought even harder once pregnant even to carry them to delivery, every day started with a prayer that please God, just keep them inside me one more dayā¦one more weekā¦one more month. I donāt wish that upon anybodyā¦having to fight for the life of your unborn child. And here is someone like OP, who is so blessed mashallah, fretting about the color of her childās skin :no:
Like I said in my earlier post, the cycle has to be broken somewhere. Just because generations before obsessed over fair skin, doesnāt mean it has to continue and carry forward to the coming generations.
Itās not ganging up, ridiculing or being mean to the OPā¦itās hoping that someoneās post, experience or advice lights a fire of enlightenment inside her. Isnāt that what this forum is all about anyway, to learn from one another?
How to have beatuful and healthy baby?
RV Totally agree. And Rabia now I get what you were taking about. I still disagree about the way people handle each other on here. We are so turned off to someone thinking differently than us, it literally makes us angry when someone says something as careless as what Op is saying. We could also lead her in the right direction, from the two threads I have read now, she seems to be a product of her environment. Samjahnay ki baat bhi ho sakthi hain. Exactly what you said RV. Itās kind of ironic because we are lecturing op about tolerance and yet are not really exhibiting the same. Race and skin color are issues everywhere, even here in the US even though its 2014. I canāt expect someone like op to be aware enough about the scope of what sheās asking living in the environment she does. Itās not far off.
I want to know why she thinks these things work? And what she will do if her duas donāt come to life? depending on the answer, thatās where the real issue is in my opinion.
Re: How to have beatuful and healthy baby?
Funny thing about the comment about enlightening others on this forumā¦yahan par aa kar to OP ko baray pyaar seā¦araam seā¦lamba, chaura likh kar samjhaao. Lekin aisa karne se pehlay isi OP k Life 1 thread main 2-3 lines main us ka mazaaq uraana about how she views her husband, in-laws, etcā¦ in the attempt to sound cool and funny. Wow. Tides sure change all of a sudden. But at least itās all before herā¦in front of her faceā¦itās worse when itās behind your back.
Re: How to have beatuful and healthy baby?
Even funnier are the ones who have are not married, are not mothers and have no experience in any of these realms giving lambay chaura daastans of advice in every thread of every topicā¦ 
Taana dhenay hai tho kulkay do
Re: How to have beatuful and healthy baby?
Ab jin k paas itna dhair saara tajurbah haiā¦then they could at least manage a consistent empathy in both the short and long of their posts. LOLā¦ Khul k hi diya hai. Bas naam nahi liya tumhara jis tarha tum ne mera nahi liya.
Re: How to have beatuful and healthy baby?
We donāt need every thread to degenerate into ātrends in GS posting.ā
Back to the topic at hand, I think itās understandable for a mom to want her child to be beautiful. It is also understandable for people to be upset and angry when someone expresses a marked preference for a āfairā child and implies that there is only one kind of beauty that will be acceptable to her. Itās a bunch of silliness at best, OP. You need to open your mind and let go of these biases and prejudices before they influence your child.
Re: How to have beatuful and healthy baby?
Is this really happening?
Wishing your child is fair is right up there with wishing your bahu to be fair and then blaming society for issues YOUāVE actively contributed to.
Please stop.
Re: How to have beatuful and healthy baby?
Wishing for a beautiful child is greatā¦absolutely great. Taliyan!
Wishing for a fair child is reinforcing the age old uneducated/backward mentality of fair fair eskin = bootiful and innocent.
Noā¦its not automatically beautifulā¦there are gorgeous people that are dark, tan, fair, olive skinned, etc. If you are fair and husband is dark, you might end up with a child whoās complexion falls somewhere in the middleā¦AND THAT IS ALSO BEAUTIFUL.
And then these totkay that eating āwhiteā things will make your baby fair. So do Africans drink black coffee all day? 
You have people on this forum who would give their left leg to have a child - be grateful and wish for your babyās health.
NOTHING you do will change the gender into a boy or the kidās complexion from dark to white.
In Pakistan, I guess this mentality is extreme? I still remember a family friend of ours once saying āshakal jaisi bhi ho, lekin chamri gori honi chahiye haiā about his potential wife to his mother. His wife was an average looking woman, bore three kids, developed breast cancer and left this world before her 35th birthdayā¦but she was very white and that was enough?
Re: How to have beatuful and healthy baby?
I am truly disgusted with some of the replies here. If only all you educated and sensible people could be more kind in your selection of words. Associating OPās desire with jahiliyat, her namaz with mere uthak bethak is so judgmental and harsh. Where did she say that she wishes just for a beautiful child and is ready to give away one eye (Allah maaf karre) to achieve that? Did I miss reading something? Allah is the divine power and can grant us ALL or a part of all that we wish. Why would he take away one thing from someone to grant another? Uss k pas koi kami tu nahi. When some of us face problems or whatever its not because Allah is punishing us. Its his way of testing us. I am not saying that Ops desire is right or wrong. I am so not interested in judging anyone.
Op be very careful in disclosing your wordly desire to human beings. Only ask Allah. And whenever you make a prayer, ask Allah to grant you whatever you need IF its behter for you and to take away the desire from your heart if its not behter for you.
Re: How to have beatuful and healthy baby?
And RV the hadith is authentic. I have read it too.
Re: How to have beatuful and healthy baby?
Totally lost for wordsā¦you should just be wishing for a healthy baby, not how the baby will look. And what is with this desi community and wanting fair and white children/spouses etc, and ādarkā complexion babies will look just as beautiful as white complexion ones. Beauty is in the eye of the beholder. You should stop being so narrow minded and realise that you should love your baby however he or she may look.
Re: How to have beatuful and healthy baby?
I totally agree with this.
I guess what Iām trying to say is that the manner in which we are trying to āfixā societal ills is not the best.
We can definitely do this in a better way. We should condemn the practice and/or the concept, not the person.
Re: How to have beatuful and healthy baby?
CP there is a big difference btw what you wrote and what the op is asking about. She isnāt asking about how to pray to Allah to achieve the fair complexion, she is asking for ātipsā to have a gori gori baby.
The advice and comments would have been different if she asked something regarding prayers, duaas to have a healthy baby.
no where in her request/question (minus the title,) OP asked how to have a healthy baby. She wants a beautiful baby which in her understanding is gori gori, with big eyes.
Re: How to have beatuful and healthy baby?
Rabia I do understand what she meant. Thatās what my reply is about. She has no control over the color of her unborn child. Neither is there any totka for that. She should ask Who has control ovet such worldly matters. If He eills she os going to have a fair skinned baby. If not she should still be thankful to Him. Dunya k saamne apni khuwahish zaher ker k insaan zaleel aur khuwar hi hota hai. I just dont understand what that unnecessary humiliation, rudeness and judgement was all about? Tameez se b baat ho sakti thi!
Re: How to have beatuful and healthy baby?
^I agree with u.
Re: How to have beatuful and healthy baby?
I am really really disappointed by reading many of the replies.. I donāt know why people on this forum are so negative thinkersā¦ :(. Well where I said k I only need a gora baby? Read other aswell also I mentioned that healthy aswell and asked about how it can be achievable by not gaining extra weight. Also being an educated does not mean that u cannot have wishesā¦ And believing in totkas is not wrong in my point of view.. When we can believe in hair totkas and others also then why only in this case it is supposed in a very negative wayā¦ I think attention and care matters. Obviously Allah is the supreme above all this to decide but still I am surprised k itni c bat ko itna bhra k aur negative way main q lyti hy duniaā¦ 
Re: How to have beatuful and healthy baby?
eat lots of fresh vegetables. this totka worked for my mom and now i am very beautiful and healthy māA.
Re: How to have beatuful and healthy baby?
What is the hair totka?
Please, I am not big on totka so have nothing for you.
However, I do agree with all those who have said to pray for a healthy baby and pray you find your baby beautiful no matter what color or gender it is. Ameen
Re: How to have beatuful and healthy baby?
PPā¦
Let me tell you of what happened in front of me one day.
We had a family over at our houseā¦they had two girls. One was really fair and one was a bit darker (not sanwali at all but compared to her sister, just a little tan). The elder one was the darker one and Iād say about 11 years old. Younger one was close to 7. There was an aunty was who chit chatting with the girlsā mom. In the middle of their convo, aunty smiles at the girls and points to the fair one while saying āye wali apki bari pyari haiā¦khubsoorat niklay giā.
The mom looked like she was going to dump her chai on auntyās head.
Another oneā¦
Where I went to high school, it was predominantly desi families that attended along with a few converted Muslims who were non-desi. One day, I found an African Muslim girl crying in the girlās bathroom. I felt so terrible, asked her what was wrong and she responded saying āever since I came here, I feel so ugly. you guys all seem to think only white skin and big eyes are pretty and i donāt have any of thoseā.
I went quiet because before that day, I hadnāt even thought about it consciously.
The point behind this isā¦beauty is not skin deep. Our daughters need to know that their skin color means nothing. Unki taleem, tarbiyat, rehen sehen, ideas, talent, capabilities, etc matter. Not how pretty they are and definitely now how fair they are. You know how hard it is for a girl who is dark to get married? Maan baap ko duniya jahan ek kar ke jahaz ki lalach deni parti hai ke koi unki sanwali beti se shaadi kar le.
Ye cheezein humari aagey ki nasal ko kamzoor karti hein and to be quite frank with youā¦it is a sign of regressionā¦not progression. Education humare dimagh ko sanwarti haiā¦at least taleem ka maqsad to yahi hota hai.
That is why people get upset. Donāt worry about how baby will lookā¦bacha is beautiful to parents no matter what. Just think about what you want for him/her.