…Bhabis and you ask your mother to treat her nicely?
how many of you even notice that your mom is not treating your bhabi just like you want to be treated at your in law’s place? If you notice something, do you talk to you mom that she should not do this to Bhabi? Do you discuss it with your hubby? like do you do “burie” of your mom in front of him ?
oh and a step further, if talking to mom has not worked in past, how many asked Bhabi’s to move out with your Bhais to their separate place and leave your parents alone?
Just curious to see how many take stand…or mom’s of all girls are angels?
PS: honest replies are more than welcome
PS2: Even single girls “who fear for their future MIL”, are free to reply
Well my mom treats my bhabi exactly the way I wanna be treated in the future, inshallah. I dont have a single bad word to say against her regarding the saas-bhahu relationship. To be honest I sometimes think she treats my bhabi better than me
I m soon going to have a bhabhi inshAllah and I keep telling my mum not to do this and not to do that. The reason I m too much concerned is because my bro is the sole son of my parents and I dont want any grievances between them. I know that my mum can be picky at times, so I often tell my bro to be patient with her.
One thing that often disturbs me is that when MILS are happy with their bahoo and thier sons happiness, the sister of the MIL or the nanund does kan bharing of the MIL and dang! There goes the happiness down the drain. Such ppl need to tied to the roof and spanked.
me. even though my mother is really a humble and nice woman but she is still a human, and I do help her in whatever knowledge i possess in the light of Quran and Sunnah. my mother also do the same with me if i had some up n downs with my SIL. (which rarely happen, cuz i take her my SIL and not sister).
I don't have a bhabi, but a cousin of mine just brought in a wife and so I guess you can call her a "bhabi" - wedding was like last week, so too early to tell. I don't socialize with that part of my family much, so I wouldn't have a clue what is going on, and I don't particularly like to meddle. I spoke to her, welcomed her in, and told her if her husband does anything retarded to let me know and I'll be sure to give him a "pitai".
never had to correct ammi in this regard.....in fact people had to tell my mom to be fair to me when it came to the division of duties in the household; more was expected of me and from me.
ammi more often than not took bhabhi's side when it came to disputes between the married couple.......so much so that brother often complained that he doesn't get treated like a "saga beta".
I dont have a Bhabi yet but I know I wont need to do it with mom because my mom is of the type who treats sons better than daughters. My brother is engaged and i and my sister can clearly see how his inlaws are treated and preferred so well as compared to what was her attitude towards our inlaws then and even now :-/ Being larki walay, she has nakhray like what I know are supposed to be done by larkay walay.. So I am pretty sure she'll be way good to my Bhabi too.
About discussing her negative moves with my hubby: yes I do..he's pretty understanding to not to use that part of 'info' wrongly because we discuss such 'buraai' of our respective families with each other openly with an intention of venting out and not to use them as a 'taana' later during fights.
kewl ....so far all moms turned out to be FANTASTIC (its only MIL who stink) ... girls whenever you are looking for bhabis's let me know, I have couple of cousins sitting home ....
honey u r asking this question from the wrong audience... here all r saying how cool r their moms and probably their bhabhies are posting on some other forums how cruel are their mils :D
honey u r asking this question from the wrong audience... here all r saying how cool r their moms and probably their bhabhies are posting on some other forums how cruel are their mils :D
honey u r asking this question from the wrong audience... here all r saying how cool r their moms and probably their bhabhies are posting on some other forums how cruel are their mils :D
I don't have a bhabi, but i have a mumaani (mom's brothers wife). And sometimes my mom expects so much out of her. i keep telling her it's not her job to take care of your parents. I really don't like the way she talks about her sometimes. My mumani married my uncle not his entire family and its clearly not her job to take care of her MIL and FIL. So yeah i dont like how she treats her bhabi and its rather unfair. poor woman has to live in a house full of inlaws and my grandparents can be so difficult at times
kewl ....so far all moms turned out to be FANTASTIC (its only MIL who stink) ... girls whenever you are looking for bhabis's let me know, I have couple of cousins sitting home ....
keep it coming girls !!!
:)
so are you looking for MIL's for your cousins or looking for husbands for your cousins? :p
My mum complains about my bhabi and how distant she keeps herself and does not get involved in the family in any way, she also tends to "blame" her for not giving attention to the family and other matters, and i constantly tell her to stop, and put a different light on the situation.
My mum never tells my bhabi on her face (they both live in separate countrys), but will complain about her to me, again in what mum complains about is not wrong, she does have a point, however i encourage her to build a relationship with her like my MIL built with me.
My MIL built a solid friendship with me, and TBH if it was not for her i certainly would not be close, so i do see the benefit of the MIL helping to create a friendly and inviting enviroment.
and as far as her complaints go, i tell her not to blame the sister in law, its my brother who needs to do more work to encourage her to fit into the family.
Maybe she doesn't want to deal with the family drama so she keeps herself out of the loop on purpose.
I don't think I'd be getting intimate with my in-laws either. Maintain a respectful distance. That way, you don't get caught up in drama.
Dude ... when you marry somone you become a part of their family and the drama is part of the package ... i don't think a married life is complete without hte drama
My future MIL is very kind towards me but I can already tell that she has a lot of expectations which I am kinda wary about. She favors her only daughter over her sons all the time as well. You all seem to be such wonderful sister-in-laws by sticking up for your bhabi's or atleast encouraging a good friendship. I am worried that if the time comes where my MIL is annoyed with me, my future sister in law is just going to side with her and just make tensions grow.
This is something unfortunate I see coming because my future hubby is always disagreeing with his sister about everything as well.
I guess the only good thing is that my future hubby and I share the same viewpoints and he has re-assured me like a million times that he will always take my side over his own families.
But as I said...I do find that its unfortunate that I can see inevitable drama ensuing in the future. Probably also because my own family is SO different.... my parents so chill and whatever. They do not meddle and they do not overreact. When I do get Bhabis ..... they are going to be the lucky ones. lol
