Re: How important is skin colour for Pakistani girls? Would dark skin be undesirable?
My hubby finds dark girls very attractive.He thinks girls with darker skin tone have better personailties.eg. Malaika Arora, Nandita Das, Salma Hayek!
What is that cliche standard of male attractiveness...."tall, dark, and handsome." There tends to be more flexibility for guys than women as even Uzair had mentioned in another thread. Things like the composition of your features and weight are important, but I have found...especially amongst my relatives in pak...that a girl will be deemed pretty solely on the basis of fair skin and other things like weight for instance is not factored in. I don't know if anybody else has experienced this..but I've encountered it several times from both the older and younger generation.
By this term they actually mean MEN with dark hair!
Re: How important is skin colour for Pakistani girls? Would dark skin be undesirable?
I have found...especially amongst my relatives in pak...that a girl will be deemed pretty solely on the basis of fair skin and other things like weight for instance is not factored in. I don't know if anybody else has experienced this..but I've encountered it several times from both the older and younger generation.
Agreed. Experienced this many times in my khandaan too.
Re: How important is skin colour for Pakistani girls? Would dark skin be undesirable?
True, Butts...what you said happens too. But the experience I mentioned...I've encountered it many times and not when a comparison is being made between two girls, rather it's just an assessment of one person...and I've found it to be incomplete and not taking into account things like overall features and obesity...and when asked why the person is found attractive, it's either just the fairness that's mentioned or a fairness and tall height...ignoring everything else. I remember once (in the US) a friend of mine said Aunti N is pretty which took me by surprise and I was like why? "Oh cuz she's fair." But other things like weight/features was not factored in...it wasn't an overall assessment. Now this friend who made the comment...I think is attractive....she's wheatish/not chitti...but she has a clear/glowing complexion....she's petite, but slender...and the composition of her facial features is soft/pleasant. I know beauty is subjective and to each his own...but my opinion wasn't based on a single criteria...and strangely I've come across this often.
Re: How important is skin colour for Pakistani girls? Would dark skin be undesirable?
personally i would choose fair i have liked both dark and light skinned men but for some weird reason i find stronger sexual attraction towards lighter skinned men. Of course personality, religion, career and family would all matter above skin colour as well as general facial features.
Re: How important is skin colour for Pakistani girls? Would dark skin be undesirable?
By this term they actually mean MEN with dark hair!
Err...yes I was already aware that the saying refers to men; I never said it was meant for women. :/ As for the word "dark"...I have read that it can refer to dark hair, a darker skin tone, and even a dark or mysterious aura. I always took it to mean skin tone.
Re: How important is skin colour for Pakistani girls? Would dark skin be undesirable?
Err...yes I was already aware that the saying refers to men; I never said it was meant for women. :/ As for the word "dark"...I have read that it can refer to dark hair, a darker skin tone, and even a dark or mysterious aura. I always took it to mean skin tone.
Re: How important is skin colour for Pakistani girls? Would dark skin be undesirable?
I wonder how your parents can say such mean things to you I.e. no girl would want to marry you. My elder sister is fair and bil is dark skinned. My sis never had an issue with it nor did my parents while accepting the proposal. My bils parents had the same thing in mind (if their dark skinned son would marry a fair girl, the kids are gonna take after their mom). This did not happen though. Who cares we all love the kids so much. I have this cousin who is an amazing young lady with dark skin. It breaks my heart to see how her own mom (my khala) looks down upon her eversince her childhood.
Re: How important is skin colour for Pakistani girls? Would dark skin be undesirable?
^ I find R. Madhavan very attractive. Is he single? jk
My mom is very fair and dad is dark. Their children are somewhere in between with some resembling mom more and others more like dad. I am medium-fair. Funny thing is, my mom loves my dad to bits...has never been bothered by his colour. But she always tells me to use a foundation that is two shades lighter than my skin tone because I'm a girl and it'll be hard to find a good rishta if they think I'm dark by their standards.
At the end of the day, there are all kinds of people out there. Educated and broad minded and the parhay likhay jaahil. If someone rejects me on the basis of my skin colour, then Alhamdulillah because I wouldn't want to be a part of their family anyway.
Not sure aBout r madhavan but what do u think of sendhil ramamurthy? I have like that in my family Nd being darkest in my family it's my family who wants me to "self improve" I'm not even sanwal rang. I don't think u should change your colour as I'm sure u are beautiful as you are. I know u'll think why don't I do the same. Thing is people have said I'm handsome some girls have liked my complexion but they've not been Pakistani.i just don't want to stand out
Re: How important is skin colour for Pakistani girls? Would dark skin be undesirable?
A friend of mine is fairly dark, 2 or perhaps 3 shades darker than Sendhil and has average looks. It didn't stop bhabi ji, who is as fair and attractive as they come, to fall for him and stand firm against tough opposition from her family for many years. They are happily married now MA.
Re: How important is skin colour for Pakistani girls? Would dark skin be undesirable?
What is that cliche standard of male attractiveness...."tall, dark, and handsome." There tends to be more flexibility for guys than women as even Uzair had mentioned in another thread. Things like the composition of your features and weight are important, but I have found...especially amongst my relatives in pak...that a girl will be deemed pretty solely on the basis of fair skin and other things like weight for instance is not factored in. I don't know if anybody else has experienced this..but I've encountered it several times from both the older and younger generation.
True it's worse for girls. and my parents want me to find a fairer girl than me to compensate which to be honest is any Pakistani girl. Yet to meet someone my colour or darker is harder . I find that so hypocritical. I hope younger generation is changing
Re: How important is skin colour for Pakistani girls? Would dark skin be undesirable?
A friend of mine is fairly dark, 2 or perhaps 3 shades darker than Sendhil and has average looks. It didn't stop bhabi ji, who is as fair and attractive as they come, to fall for him and stand firm against tough opposition from her family for many years. They are happily married now MA.
Thanks dude I needed to hear some more happy stories. If only more guys and girls would stand against this family opposition society might change. We need dark is beautiful campaign in Pakistan
Re: How important is skin colour for Pakistani girls? Would dark skin be undesirable?
Quite frankly, a guy can overcome "less" attractive features on the basis of his personality, carriage and presence. And do keep in mind, attractiveness and attraction is in the eye of the beholder. If you're confident, interesting and take care with your appearance (are well-groomed) - the right girl won't care about the outer shell.
But in the interest of full disclosure, if a guy is extremely dark, really short (5'5" and under - especially if he's pursuing a girl whose about the same height) and overweight, then all those elements of appearance will only be overcome if you wow a girl and her family. First impressions do matter.
Re: How important is skin colour for Pakistani girls? Would dark skin be undesirable?
What is that cliche standard of male attractiveness...."tall, dark, and handsome." There tends to be more flexibility for guys than women as even Uzair had mentioned in another thread. Things like the composition of your features and weight are important, but I have found...especially amongst my relatives in pak...that a girl will be deemed pretty solely on the basis of fair skin and other things like weight for instance is not factored in. I don't know if anybody else has experienced this..but I've encountered it several times from both the older and younger generation.
I definitely agree its worse for girls and my family is unusual in this way. I'm thinking it would be worse in my family if I was a girl which is sad. Thefact i being told to find a fairergirl so my kids arefair is disturbing. I want to know how prevalent it is. More than females it is probably family that objects. In our community marrying a white Muslim is ok but not black.
In my options given above which one would you choose all else being equal like personality, character and religion?
Re: How important is skin colour for Pakistani girls? Would dark skin be undesirable?
I think it's mostly the parents who have problems with the appearance of the girl rather than the guys themselves. This is what I've always seen. My friend's been looking for rishtas for quite a while now and there was this guy we knew who wanted someone like her to get married to (education, ghar ka mahaul etc.) but he's really fair, like Syrians/Lebanese and so is his family, and my friend is not dark but not really fair, like Wheatish. Anyway I knew that if the guy came along to see the girl he wouldv said yes, but his mom didn't bring him. She went to see the girl, although she'd already seen her pic and expressed her concerns about color. Basically she said no... I don't know why she went in the first place. I'd shown her the pic without telling my friend so if she'd just been upfront and said no to us then my friend would have no way o finding out. But no she had to go and see chai parade and then said no the girls too dark.
Mostly always the parents wanting fairer bahu, case in point, OP
That is true girls have it worse. That is so sad that the guy was thatsuperficial. Fair skin is relative I would consider Wheatish as fair as I am much darker. I think these families are the issue. We should have rishta site for dark skinned Pakistanis catering to those who think they are dark and to people and families who have no issues.
Re: How important is skin colour for Pakistani girls? Would dark skin be undesirable?
It is hard to say like that. Complexion, features, etc do matter but more important is how one carries their self. Personally speaking i'd prefer a medium complexioned guy over say someone as porcelain as neil mukesh, lol. However the above sceneior as presented by the topic starter, in such a case if everything is equal i had most probably go for the lighter skin guy cuz i guess he'll look better with me...(as weird as it may sound).
Thanks for your honesty.dont feel like you have to feel bad for your attraction. It's something you can't completely control. All we can control is how we act and treat others
Re: How important is skin colour for Pakistani girls? Would dark skin be undesirable?
My hubby finds dark girls very attractive.He thinks girls with darker skin tone have better personailties.eg. Malaika Arora, Nandita Das, Salma Hayek!
By this term they actually mean MEN with dark hair!
That's good that he is open minded. One should be open minded in words and action