Re: How important is attraction to you
I think all of us can atleast tell if our parents are happy or not. It comes out some way or the other no matter how much they might try to hide it or shield us from it.
And yes I understand what one of the the other posters meant by that was another time anothe rgeneration. I meant that if everything else checks out but the guy is not exactly hot, u could still find him attractive once u r in the husband wife mode or even during the engagement period.
I speak from experience. Because in my head I had always liked atheletic build guys, not those bulky muscles but lean swimmer type bodies. And my husband was in the Bhai category AND he did not have an atheletic body. But he was the person (from like 30-40 Pakistani ppl at my university) who everyone had something good to say about. Even the ppl who my hubby later told me that he himself didn’t like, they had on different occasions always said something nice about my hubby. And when the rishta came and I told my mom about it, she discussed it with my dad. From that time till the rishta was done my dad and I had no direct conversation about it at all. I think he felt awkward and I felt shy, so all rishta talk was thru my mom (I was in the US at that time and my parents were in the middle east). But once the parents met and it was done, my dad called me to congratulate me and he told me how happy he was and how much he liked my hubby from the first time he’d met him. That he was the best guy from all the ppl he’d met when he visited. Anyway my point is that even now if I have to describe someone as good looking and attractive my criteria is still the same. And though my husband may not fulfill all that criteria he is certainly the one I am most attracted to. I guess it IS a blessing that Allah puts love in our hearts for our spouses, no matter what we may have hoped for or wanted for in our lives He certainly knows what is actually best for us.