When you’re finding a life partner.
Re: How important is attraction to you
It is important enough to find her attractive. To me it is important she dresses up really good..coz i do!.
Re: How important is attraction to you
10/10. Body over brains.
Re: How important is attraction to you
btw since both of you that responded are men(i'm assuming), if you two are attracted to her, is there some signal a man sends that he's attracted without it being like those guys that are vulgar and crass. Haven't been around too many straight men to identify decent men attraction signals and the the signals those men send that are more of the scumbag variety. I need to be a better scumbag detector. Not all men are created equal or as kind hearted as my brothers is what i'm learning.
What if the person seems kind, you have lots in common and you can have good conversations with them but there's no attraction? Like zilch, zero, you feel nothing when you look into each others' eyes. Would you explore it a bit more or send a clear sign that you don't want to pursue it anymore.
I think the first thing needs to be some sort of physical attraction. Pretty important...but saying that doesn't mean you just want a Calvin Klein underwear model looking guy...there just needs to be some sort of physical attraction to take the next step.
Re: How important is attraction to you
It is important enough to find her attractive. To me it is important she dresses up really good..coz i do!.
Hmm so she could be a nicely dressed cougar... :D
Re: How important is attraction to you
Ok first thing is where did we see her. Say some family event etc...i would just go and strike a convo..of course depending on the situation. And say you meet someone who basically matches up compatibility wise...but do not feel attraction...than i personally there is any point of continuing. But heyy it sometimes does happen ke there is no attraction initially...but when you get to know them...it makes the attraction grow.
Re: How important is attraction to you
soorat se seerat bhali...i'll always go for the good qualities in the girl rather than the good looks. if i can find both in a girl, it will be great! :)
Re: How important is attraction to you
never thought attraction was only physical, so in that sense..most important
Re: How important is attraction to you
Yeah, I'd say its pretty important.
Physical attraction definitely is important because usually it is what hooks someone. You see an attractive woman or man and that is what sparks interest.
Now to keep that interest, there needs to be much more.
Re: How important is attraction to you
Plenty important. If I think of him as "bhai" type (i.e. feel zero attraction for him), how can it possibly go beyond that? No point in wasting anyone's time.
As for your other question about signals good men send to indicate interest in a girl, well, unless you two are family friends, sit in the same cubicle at work, or have known each other forever, I don't think a guy would waste time, money and energy on a girl he isn't attracted to. So if he is making the effort to find out your likes/dislikes/interests/whereabouts or if he hints at going out some time, then chances are, he is probably interested in exploring his options.
Re: How important is attraction to you
Like Philosophy said, attraction is not physical for me either, I've had it where i'm talking to a really conventionally hot, handsome guy and I feel nothing when I look into his eyes and I feel zero attraction. Unfortunately, the guys I do feel that spark of attraction with are totally not compatible, not the same language, not the same subculture, nothing but this feeling of attraction and we see no future together. The ones that are a match in terms of bio data are not compatible in terms of behavior and there's no mutual attraction. The type of attraction where you feel like kissing the guy when you look deep in his eyes but of course can't....rare for me.
Re: How important is attraction to you
Plenty important. *If I think of him as "bhai" type *(i.e. feel zero attraction for him), how can it possibly go beyond that? No point in wasting anyone's time.
One minute silence for our friend zoned brother
Re: How important is attraction to you
As for the OP, everyone cares about looks at a certain level but in the end they're not the main thing. No point being with someone hot if their behavior is troll like
Re: How important is attraction to you
Attraction is important, very important! However it goes byeyond their physical appearance and if somebody has average appearance but has a good heart, nature...you can still be very attracted to them.
Sometimes all you need is a spark :P.
Re: How important is attraction to you
^That!!
Re: How important is attraction to you
I think human psychology is complex enough that a friendzoned guy or Bhai type guy could also end up bein really attractive to u depending on how things conspire or how ur relationship develops. I think the attraction or "spark" or "the one" stuff they sell to u in the movies really spoils real life events for some ppl if they are stupid enough to think that that is the only way it can work. Or that is something that everyone should experience in order to be happy and lead a content life. Though I have come across many girls who talk/think like that I have never met a desi guy waiting for "the one" and getting cold feet about whether this is the right person or not and whether they will be eternally happy or not and looking for magical signs to point him in the right direction.
This had been true all my life till my BFF met and fell for a douche bag of epic proportions, who after arranged rishta meeting and carrying a relationship for two years cited the above reasons for not marrying her. A guy who's parents had said Hamari koi requirement nahi hae, bus yay Jisko pasand karay hum uski shadi within a month kar daingay. He strung my friend along for two years, 1.5 of which he was deciding, then after actually ordering a ring and setting up an elaborate proposal plan, with a cruise and dinner etc., went back to the deciding phase because his ring didn't arrive in time for all this to happen as planned and he saw that as a sign (go figure). Anyway another few months of stringing along, saying he doesn't know how to brig it up with his parents (the ones who have met him up with umpteen number of girls so that he would finally marry someone, and who have already told him just tell us the girl and we'll have the wedding). Ofcourse I kept telling my friend to just end it all along cuz I could see all the signs and she couldn't. Anyway, I never knew that guys also fall for this Disney happily ever after stuff. I thought they were less emotional (or stupid) than that. Oh well I know the op was only talking about physical attraction and I took it off on a tangent but I needed to vent. But basically what I'm saying is that our parents generation got married without even seeing each other, and if they could manage to live fulfilling lives then maybe we're over thinking this one with the sparks and the physical attraction n all. I think as long as u don't actually physically detest the other person, u can fall in love with anyone who has a really good heart and also find them attractive.
Re: How important is attraction to you
But basically what I'm saying is that our parents generation got married without even seeing each other, and if they could manage to live fulfilling lives then maybe we're over thinking this one with the sparks and the physical attraction n all. I think as long as u don't actually physically detest the other person, u can fall in love with anyone who has a really good heart and also find them attractive.
Exactly..that is what i was talking to my buddy with. What the heck are we doing wrong? Going after that "spark" which is going to go away in a blink once the reality of life kicks in. Lets pray for the best!.
Re: How important is attraction to you
how important is sexual intercourse to you? if you want babies out of marriage, this is a crucial step. is it possible to have successful intercouse with someone you feel no attraction to? if yes, you are all set. if not, find someone who you feel the urge to make babies with.
Re: How important is attraction to you
Sasha21, women had different priorities back then in comparison to women of our generation.. mostly it was about security and being 'looked after'..
I work and live in a place where I don't need that level of security from a man so of course my priorities are different.. I couldn't be in a marriage where I'm not supposed to call my husband by his name or be expected to sacrifice my happiness for his.. I always wanted my husband to be my best friend as well as my lover, not have him in an elevated position as in a traditional marriage back then..
A lot of us lead VERY different lives to those our mothers did so it's a bit naive to think what worked for them would be best for us imo