Mother of husband asks him.whether u ( wife) is khafa from them .
Wife is Ill has had a high temp and has lost rr voice last 3 days. And yet the mother in law has not once asked. And probably doesn’t care and yet has this complaint from daughter in law.
Husband asked wife of she doesn’t mind chatting to.his.mother once she feels.better to clear the air.
Why? And why couldn’t husband ask his mother the obvious question " u havent asked.her how she is once so how would u know she is Ill or khafa
And its obvious wife is Ill
He said she is.not khafa she is unwell. Although yes wife is peed off no one bothered yo ask.even.father in kae asks only when mother in law out of earshot.
And yet the mother in law has not once asked. And probably doesn't care and yet has this complaint from daughter in law.
You don't like your MIL, and apparently she doesn't like you either, so why does it bother you that she doesn't ask about you? If it were me, I'd be happy my MIL is leaving me alone and not trying to spend time with me! My MIL (doesn't live with me) used to ring me like 6 times a day to check on what's happening in my house, as well as then speak to my husband. Now she only bothers speaking to my husband, and only occasionally speaks to me. And we do speak I usually feel bad afterwards because she'll say things to annoy/upset me. So I am HAPPY our phone time has been cut down drastically! Why can't you be happy she's not talking to you? You don't even like her!
Dont want talksA mere formality of asking when unwell is not too much is it.And then.her complaint to my husband that maybe I am.upset / moody.Wtf. No I am.unwell.And why couldn't she ask me.And husband? Asks me if I will talk and clear the air? Whatever.
Dont want talksA mere formality of asking when unwell is not too much is it.And then.her complaint to my husband that maybe I am.upset / moody.Wtf. No I am.unwell.And why couldn't she ask me.And husband? Asks me if I will talk and clear the air? Whatever.
I'm currently not well due to pregnancy (nausea and vomiting all the time) and my MIL doesn't care. My husband has a cough... a COUGH... no fever, no flu, he's just coughing loads. And she rings me up to say make fish ka salan, dalchani wala kaava, etc etc for him, when I can barely stand these days and HE is looking after ME. Even he tells his mum that he's fine and just taking cough sweets lol, but she makes a big drama out of it and yet chooses to completely ignore how I'm feeling. It doesn't bother me, because at the end of the day she is my SAAS and that's what I expect from her.
Your husband is there for you and taking care of you - that's all that matters. You have to accept that your MIL will never be your mother. The important relationship is your husband - if he's there for you and looking after you, then don't bother about anything else. Let HIM deal with his mother, and don't let it phase you. Learn to IGNORE her. It's easier said than done, I know... but try.
Nadz, I don't mean this in a nasty way at all but if you carry on thinking like this you might end up just like your mil.. Like nnabid said I think you should be happy she's not in your face so much anymore..
Spend your time doing things you enjoy and minimise the level of importance her actions have in your life.. You obviously don't want to end up like her, she sounds bitter and interfering.. I'd bet anything she had a difficult relationship with her own mil as well..
Don't you have any hobbies? Why do you get so worked up over petty issues? You have accepted living in Pakistan then why aren't you moving on with your life?! Have an identity of your own outside of your in-laws, seriously.
^ is it so bad that Mr. nadz wants to have his mother and wife get along. Nadz please stop worrying about petty issues like this. Try to have a good relationship with your MIL, if you can't thn move on. You seem to have issues with anything and everything she does.
Mother of husband asks him.whether u ( wife) is khafa from them .
Wife is Ill has had a high temp and has lost rr voice last 3 days. And yet the mother in law has not once asked. And probably doesn't care and yet has this complaint from daughter in law.
Husband asked wife of she doesn't mind chatting to.his.mother once she feels.better to clear the air.
Why? And why couldn't husband ask his mother the obvious question " u havent asked.her how she is once so how would u know she is Ill or khafa
And its obvious wife is Ill
He said she is.not khafa she is unwell. Although yes wife is peed off no one bothered yo ask.even.father in kae asks only when mother in law out of earshot.
Disclaimer
Yes the wife is me
Is this really such a big deal? I think you need to stop making an issue of something so minor. So what if your husband asked you to talk to your MIL to clear the air? Can't you do it just to make him happy instead of ranting about the fact that he should have gone off at his own mother for not seeing how you are? You know that you are not your MIL's favourite person so why add fuel to the fire? Why not just do what your husband asks to keep the peace? The last thing a man wants to hear when he has been working all day is his wife whinging and complaining over petty issues. You need to understand that she is his mother and no matter what he will NOT be at war with her for you, unless she is blatantly wrong/abusive which it doesn't seem she is. If you don't realize this, pretty soon your husband will begin to resent your behaviour.
He just asked nadz "if she doesn't mind chatting to.his.mother once she feels.better to clear the air."
It isn't exactly his fault if the other person is going to take it as an offence.
It's a harmless request if you don't have any context. Based on what we've been told over many, many threads, this DIL and MIL are constantly picking at each other about stupid things and creating drama. They don't want to get along, they just want to "win". And the husband is being stupid and letting himself get caught up in this. What was the point in MIL asking, "Is she mad at me? :@: " Is she a 13yo to engage in these games? If she was concerned that her DIL was upset, she should have approached her directly. But she just wanted to look concerned and DIL just wants to look like a wronged victim. And the husband is encouraging their drama. It's silliness.
Mother of husband asks him.whether u ( wife) is khafa from them .
Wife is Ill has had a high temp and has lost rr voice last 3 days. And yet the mother in law has not once asked. And probably doesn't care and yet has this complaint from daughter in law.
Husband asked wife of she doesn't mind chatting to.his.mother once she feels.better to clear the air.
Why? And why couldn't husband ask his mother the obvious question " u havent asked.her how she is once so how would u know she is Ill or khafa
And its obvious wife is Ill
He said she is.not khafa she is unwell. Although yes wife is peed off no one bothered yo ask.even.father in kae asks only when mother in law out of earshot.
Disclaimer
Yes the wife is me
Nadzzz...
STOP this insane obsession with your MIL asking you if you're sick or feeling unwell or expecting your MIL to treat you the way she wants you to treat her.
STOP it now.
It will NEVER EVER happen...ever.
The way you handle it is:
If you hear your MIL cough or find out she's sick, ask her "hey MIL, you feeling alright? do you have what you need?, blah blah blah"
When YOU get sick.........silence........more silence...........oh do you hear that?..........silence...........
You can expect things from your husband but PLEASE STOP thinking your MIL has any obligation towards you because you have none towards her.
its obvious you are craving for affection from your mil. just hug her with all your germs. then next week ask her how she's doing when she's the one sick.
its obvious you are craving for affection from your mil. just hug her with all your germs. then next week ask her how she's doing when she's the one sick.
