How do "married off" daughters take care of their parents

[arshad5]

Re: How do “married off” daughters take care of their parents

@cherryontop

People need to align their thought processes with religion so that they realize that taking care of your parents is a responsibility of both sons and daughters and not just limited to sons! I never looked down upon joint family systems but this whole notion of a daughter devoting her life to taking care of her in-laws and saying adios to her parents as soon as she gets married is very much a concept that we inherited from our next door neighbors. And there is absolutely nothing wrong with taking care of your in-laws and should be done with as much dedication. Just don’t make it seem that a woman can’t take be there or take care of her parents once she is married! Other than India and Pakistan, there is no other nation that thinks along such lines!!

So now you are saying that there is not much difference between “dogmatic hindu customs” and Islam? The only difference is that the girl has to give up her parents in “dogmatic hindu customs” but in Islam she can keep on looking after them, after marriage? Now tell me how you define looking after? Does that mean that your parents move in with you after your marriage and replace your in-laws? or does it mean that you visit them regularly and maybe cook them a meal, or take them to the doctors?

@cherryontop

Again, religion emphasizes taking care of your parents. It doesn’t emphasize that sons need to take care of their parents and daughters can let go of this very important responsibility as soon as they’re married. South Asian customs on the other hand are busy focusing on how the daughter is only responsible for her husband and her in-laws. These customs would have been compatible with our religion had equal importance been given to both sets of parents which is sadly not the case. Just because I am married doesn’t mean my parents have to spend their entire old age with my brother. I want to enjoy their company and be blessed with their presence too and that will not be taken away from me just because I am married!

Again define for me what you mean by looking after your parents under “your” Islam after marriage and how that is different from my “dogmatic hindu customs”.? Quoting something directly from the Quran would help my understanding here.