Consider an arranged rishta setting. You have shortlisted a girl from the dozen photos that were brought to you (on the basis of her looks, duh, thats what guys do!).
Now you are sitting in her drawing room with your phuppi, chachi, khala, and your entire neighborhood. While your phuppi asks her how many perfectly round rotis can she make in a minute, whats going on in your mind?
Re: How do guys know if she is the one?
You only know after.
Like when you know.. that She is Not the…Not the one.
Then She must be the one.
But if She Not the one… then you suffer. …
Sorry nature of the business.
Re: How do guys know if she is the one?
Interesting question. I’d like to know this too.
Re: How do guys know if she is the one?
30 minute conversation usually filters them. ill try to offend her, and see how she reacts. squeeze a fruit and the aseel comes forth. the body language, the expression the choice of words. I let them ask the question, I dont have my list of questions. Its their list that gives me insight into their thought/mind.
she graduates the first time…i do it the second time. no one survives the second round. lol
if no red flags, then its a 50-50. I like 50-50 in my perception. Its the best possible really. rest is fate. Go with the flow, let the chips fall as they may kindda deal…
Re: How do guys know if she is the one?
Dude, you should definitely date PCG 
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I want to. I can imagine how much fun the 30minutes will be. hook me up to my lover who will dump me instantly herself 
Re: How do guys know if she is the one?
ppl, remember the other thread “he is the one”?
So he is NOT the one. 
Re: How do guys know if she is the one?
I think that for some people, feeling a physical attraction is enough to determine whether the guy/girl is the one. And there are stories of love at first sight out there…but then I wonder…that maybe those individuals lucked out in that the personality/character etc of the person they were instantly attracted to was compatible with their own. Among both sides of my extended family in Pakistan…and especially in my paternal side…my cousins who are married had their rishtas decided in a week…and they didn’t have any contact with their spouse-to-be until after the shadi. If I were to ask them how they know the other person was “the one,” they’d say that the parents approved and it was destined to be that way. Sometimes I wonder if they have it easier because they’ve kept it simple. But speaking for myself, I think the person who is “the one” would be someone that you are attracted to physically as well but more importantly you’re also compatible with them personality-wise. You’re both on the same page with values etc. And I imagine you’d feel contentment because you know they can be trusted to be by your side thru thick and thin; that there’s mutual desire/ability to compromise and have consideration and to make it work. But it takes time to determine these traits in a person and that may not be possible in an arranged setting. Maybe there is no such thing as “the one” and that it’s just a matter of qismat/naseeb.
Re: How do guys know if she is the one?
Re: How do guys know if she is the one?
you will get nice dreams about her … …
well, then you might also get dreams about different actresses. NVM, forget about dreams & let me know if you have a definite answer.
Re: How do guys know if she is the one?
if thats the case then I have met so many “The One” for me that you have no idea. But after 2-3 there look doesn’t make me feel that they are the one … seems like I am stuck now!
I believe look is good for your first conversation, I mean at least there should be something to make you make the first move but then it comes down to the personality and I am really bad at judging people.
Re: How do guys know if she is the one?
shikaeeteen lagany ka kitna shaoq hy
Re: How do guys know if she is the one?
main to jori bana raha tha
Re: How do guys know if she is the one?
Re: How do guys know if she is the one?
you don’t. leap of faith
Re: How do guys know if she is the one?
If there’s a strong attraction or spark I think a lot of the time the other stuff just falls into place..
Yeah, I’m a massive romantic :sid:
Re: How do guys know if she is the one?
Unfortunately during rishta process no one is showing their true honest side, it’s all a facade. Its like an interview, where they ask you “what are your weaknesses?” and you answer “I work too hard” instead of saying “i love sleeping in until 1pm every day.” Everyone is “nice” so nice should never be a criteria on the list, because that should be a given. Everything should be taken with a grain of salt and a healthy dose of skepticism during rishta process.
Best way to assess a girl is to determine her goals and values in life. If opportunity arises, she how she interacts with her family (specifically her parents), see how girl presents herself in public (whats her public image like–does she like to be popular girl, likes to be center of attention, be approached by others or she herself likes to mingle with anyone and everyone, or is she more modest and conscious of her behavior and selective in who she chooses to interact with), look at her mother (see what kind of values her mom has–does she really prioritize family life, respects her husband and teaches her kids about being good decent human beings or does mother emphasize and focus more on fashion, material, socializing, fun all the time–will give good insight into what kind of values the girl herself will have), look at who she surrounds herself with (including her sisters and her close friends as she will be likely influenced and have similar mindsets as the people she enjoys spending time with). Also best way to determine how they’ll be is to see how a girl handles stress and disagreements. Does she take a conciliatory, kind, compromising approach to find solutions to disagreements or does she laugh it off just to avoid draining discussions, or not validate your concerns or start saying ma behn ki galliya or make divisive comments like “it’s my life I will do whatever I want.” How one fights gives good insight. And as always look for trends in behavior and words (make sure her words and actions align..talk is cheap, actions require actual effort) and make sure it’s consistent over a period of time to see if it’s a true part of her character and personality.
Re: How do guys know if she is the one?
Girls are ridiculous about this whole notion of love at first sight or waiting for a spark. It’s all BS. Life is way too complicated to depend on superificial things like that.
Attraction and chemistry are important but most often girls don’t give it enough time to develop and think it has to be there from the beginning. Love takes time, before then the attraction is all based on superificial things and it’s called infatuation or lust which are not sustainable in long term.
Re: How do guys know if she is the one?
^If it’s BS how did I end up married to him? 
I’m guessing you’re not married and have never been in a relationship (I’m NOT saying that’s a bad thing before anyone jumps on me btw) but saying that love can ONLY develop over a certain period of time or after marriage is also quite convenient in a culture where we weren’t traditionally allowed to meet our partners before marriage.. The traditional system would collapse if people stopped believing otherwise.. People can and are happily married after falling in love or feeling a spark the way I’ve described..
Re: How do guys know if she is the one?
In our family, we dont do short listing by pictures, and round roti skills. There are strict instructions from grand parents for assessing each girl carefully, prior to making an actual visit. What you are referring to is, would be window shopping . . however there are parts of my extended family, they seem to violate every little ethic known to man.
Now, answering your question, would not that be unfair, like giving a cheat sheet ? Why cant you just be yourself, and see if the both prospects fits each other requirements. Getting a rishta should be different than getting a job at apple 