Anyone heard of this? Tried it? We want to do this so we can afford our honeymoon…plus, we’re living kinda nomadic lifestyles for the next 4-6 years so the less bulky presents/stuff to carry, the better. We were going to put “no boxed gifts” or something on our invites (I know , I know, major wedding invitation sin…sorry!) but I was curious how this honeyfund business would work.
It’s basically a registry for your honeymoon. People can put money to contribute to the trip, the hotel, or perks like a couple’s massage, snorkeling lessons, etc.
Ok, so in my humble opinion, a "honey fund" is an even bigger faux pax then "no boxed gifts". A wedding is an occasion in which you are inviting family, friends and loved ones to rejoice with you on this new journey, not fund your massages or snorkeling excursions. It's extremely presumptuous to dictate to people what they should or should not gift you. Honestly, if I were to receive a wedding invitation with the request to deposit money or gift money towards the couple's honeymoon, I would politely decline the invite and sit the wedding out.
Majority of weddings nowdays people gift money, well close family & friends tend to, why not just use that? Specifically asking for contributions towards your honeymoon does clme across abit tacky as people would assume if you can afford a wedding then surely you can afford a small honeymoon thats between you and hubby. And im a firm believer the guy should organise the honeymoon! Lol thats just me
Ok, so in my humble opinion, a "honey fund" is an even bigger faux pax then "no boxed gifts". A wedding is an occasion in which you are inviting family, friends and loved ones to rejoice with you on this new journey, not fund your massages or snorkeling excursions. It's extremely presumptuous to dictate to people what they should or should not gift you. Honestly, if I were to receive a wedding invitation with the request to deposit money or gift money towards the couple's honeymoon, I would politely decline the invite and sit the wedding out.
Majority of weddings nowdays people gift money, well close family & friends tend to, why not just use that? Specifically asking for contributions towards your honeymoon does clme across abit tacky as people would assume if you can afford a wedding then surely you can afford a small honeymoon thats between you and hubby. And im a firm believer the guy should organise the honeymoon! Lol thats just me
All of what you're saying makes sense. My gora friends don't see the problem with doing somthing like that but I wanted desi ppl's opinion. It seemed a little off to me too...
PLus a lot of your guests attending the wedding may be relatives/friends of your parents AND in laws ... in that age group. Just think ... would you feel comfortable approaching your mum dad to pay for your honeymoon?
how much more awkward to have various aunties/uncles knowing about and paying for your ...ermm .... intimate vacation plans .... thats disturbing!
PLus a lot of your guests attending the wedding may be relatives/friends of your parents AND in laws ... in that age group. Just think ... would you feel comfortable approaching your mum dad to pay for your honeymoon?
how much more awkward to have various aunties/uncles knowing about and paying for your ...ermm .... intimate vacation plans .... thats disturbing!
Just plan something you can afford now.
that was honestly MOST of my concern. My fiance is adamant he doesn't want to ask his family for $$ (I can respect that) and we're students so we were trying to find a way around not being able to do one at all. But the thought of having my parents/family friends know that they paid for our couple's massage makes me want to cringe.
that was honestly MOST of my concern. My fiance is adamant he doesn't want to ask his family for $$ (I can respect that) and we're students so we were trying to find a way around not being able to do one at all. But the thought of having my parents/family friends know that they paid for our couple's massage makes me want to cringe.
look i get that you/your fiance kinda want it all because you marry only once (most of us haha) and it just isnt the same later perhaps ... but given all of your personal restrictions (being poor students, no savings, lack of time yet not wanting to delay the wedding) .... it just doesnt seem feasible. if you guys really want a honeymoon then cut back somewhere on the wedding expenses or do what you can with the cash gifts you will get.
but what i really wanted to tell you was ... that your post wedding time is going to be very very special and memorable whether you end up at a ritzy location or not. Really its just being with your special person in an unrestricted manner that makes the experience romantic .... and that can be in a little room overlooking a freeway and laughing over/eating a 5 dollar pizza (im exaggerating). you are going to remember the special little stolen moments/glances more then any couples massage or other such thing ... true story :D
look i get that you/your fiance kinda want it all because you marry only once (most of us haha) and it just isnt the same later perhaps ... but given all of your personal restrictions (being poor students, no savings, lack of time yet not wanting to delay the wedding) .... it just doesnt seem feasible. if you guys really want a honeymoon then cut back somewhere on the wedding expenses or do what you can with the cash gifts you will get.
but what i really wanted to tell you was ... that your post wedding time is going to be very very special and memorable whether you end up at a ritzy location or not. Really its just being with your special person in an unrestricted manner that makes the experience romantic .... and that can be in a little room overlooking a freeway and laughing over/eating a 5 dollar pizza (im exaggerating). you are going to remember the special little stolen moments/glances more then any couples massage or other such thing ... true story :D
Haha, I know. I feel like a terrible person sometimes for having all these random things that I get hung up on. I've told my fiance that our honeymoon planning is all upto him and I'll be happy anywhere we go but I would prefer some type of tropical/beach setting. Considering I wanted to go to maldives for the past few years, this is yet another compromise but you're right--keeping the bigger picture in mind. We can always do something fancier when we have more money and aren't going on mommy and daddy's tab. sigh.
I don't really mind the "no boxed gifts" thing as I see it as more practical for some couples, that it's often going towards a necessity like setting up a new home... Of course the money can be spent on anything in theory but asking outright for money for a holiday just seems a bit off to me..
I don't really mind the "no boxed gifts" thing as I see it as more practical for some couples, that it's often going towards a necessity like setting up a new home... Of course the money can be spent on anything in theory but asking outright for money for a holiday just seems a bit off to me..
Yeah I agree. I just wanted to get a feel of what other people thought. We were planning on using the money for the honeymoon (my parents are furnishing our apartment as a wedding gift to me because, again, we're poor students) but someone pointed us in the direction of this honeyfund thing.
No boxed gifts, I've never minded because if I'm giving a gift to my friend, I usually need input as to what would be more useful and cash is a safe go-to. I don't expect presents from anyone but I know my friends/family and I know they're going to ask me what I want...and since they're brown and don't believe in wedding registries, saying no boxed gifts saves us the trouble of either trying to return everything, storing it at my parents' already small/overcrowded house, or paying a gajillion dollars to ship it to where wherever we're moving.
Last month I went to a wedding where the invitation had no mention of "boxed gifts" being welcome or not.
IT WAS FREAKING AMAZING TO SEE THIS INVITATION!!!
There had to be around 300 people at the event and yes, there were maybe 10 or 15 gift bags/boxes on a table in the reception area but for the most part I'm sure that everyone gave cash.
That's the way it should be.
As for the honeyfund....I'd be disgusted if any of my friends invited me to contribute to their post wedding getaway in such a blatant fashion.
Agree with all the comments mentioning how this is tacky. I don't mind "no boxed gifts" on invites. Whatever money you get through this....afterwards plan your wedding according to that. As mentioned several times before....you want it? Be ready to pay for it. You and your fiancé want to get married now instead of waiting until both of you are earning money. There's nothing wrong with it but understand and accept that this choice requires certain compromises.
A definite no no! (For all of the reasons above). However, if you have a close family member who asks you what gift you want for the wedding I believe it's okay to say that money is the preference. On my wedding, my brother kept asking me what I wanted and I just straight up told him to contribute to our post wedding holiday (haha didn't want to call it a honeymoon :p ) and he ended up giving us 5 thousand dollars. So don't write anything on the wedding invite or have a registry but if someone asks you can tell them your preference.
I would rather put no boxed gifts too... Honeyfund to me sounds tacky as well, but you know if you are going to have your wedding in Pakistan I wouldn't do it. haha
How do people convey that they don't want gifts at a wedding? I certainly don't want any when I'll only be staying there for a month excess luggage would be annoying for me.
Lot of people, even when they give boxed gifts, give a gift receipt with that, so I guess you can always return, at least against a store credit that can be used later.
But many give cash anyways, as Muzna mentioned.
Speaking of that, my bday is this month. All of you are invited. No boxed gifts please. Instead, contribute to my tummy tucking fund.
Ok, so in my humble opinion, a "honey fund" is an even bigger faux pax then "no boxed gifts". A wedding is an occasion in which you are inviting family, friends and loved ones to rejoice with you on this new journey, not fund your massages or snorkeling excursions. It's extremely presumptuous to dictate to people what they should or should not gift you. Honestly, if I were to receive a wedding invitation with the request to deposit money or gift money towards the couple's honeymoon, I would politely decline the invite and sit the wedding out.
I've started to like the pic in your dp after this reply :P
Why do we even need to write 'no boxed gifts' on invites anymore? It seems like it is the gift all desis give on weddings. Some people say if you don't write it on your invite, aunties will come with a pitcher they bought for sale (or even a regifted item lol).
