anyway, i’m kind of stuck in how to answer my cousin about her situation. so i was wondering if i could get some input in how you would deal with this as a parent, **and **as an advice giver. i’m gonna try keeping it short because i know i’ll end up rambling if i go beyond my limit aagghh.
ok so cousin, 19, possible accounting student who was made redundant before exams (a few months ago) and wanted a job pretty quick to continue paying for herself. she asked me, and i happened to have a uni friend who is part time/weekend shift manager at mcdonalds who got her a job as crew member. now her responsibilities are the usual front counter stuff, serving drinks and packed up food and cleaning etc.
initially her parents were okay with it because she had expressed her discomfort of working there (just a personal choice i suppose) and wanting to find a job quickly that she would be more comfortable with. but her mum started asking my mum if working at mcdonalds is haram, my mum was like no idea tbh it should be okay it’s not like she’s full out touching haram meat and if people can work at tescos handling bottles of wine or whatever why is this any different? her mum phoned up some religious guy off the tv and he was like it’s not my place to say but i would strongly advise against it. bas agar muslamic uncle nay keh diya toh sahi ho ga. her mum is now hell bent on her quitting the job. even though my friend told me she’s a really good worker, and she picks up things pretty fast and as much as everyone likes to slate off mcdonalds workers it’s a really hard job that could open up opportunities for her in other areas.
so yeah, her parents are saying stuff like oh theres sleazy men working in the kitchen and how it’s haram kaam and it doesn’t look good that their daughter works at mcdonalds. this opened up a whole new can of worms, hijab. she’s been getting a lot of heat for not wearing a hijab when her younger sisters do and how the paki community view them all of a sudden. so she was all HEY if sweet can do that and still turn out pretty okay then stop this abomination! obviously her parents weren’t pleased (and rightly so, i’m a hindrance :D) and are still pushing for her to wear a headscarf.
now she was like to me.. “i might as well just quit working there if it’s going to cause such a rift between us and i was going to do hijab in my own time when i felt comfortable but i’ll just put it on now” i don’t know. her parents aren’t bad people i just feel like they need to back off, the girl has a job and doesn’t want to mooch off her parents and she’s only maintaining this job whilst looking for another one so she can keep bringing in some money for herself. as for hijab, it just shouldn’t be forced upon you. she’s being more cooperative than most.
do you guys think her parents are right? why, why not? what advice would you give her? what would you do as parents?
sorry this turned out a little longer than i expected.
Tell her parents that Men dont work at McDonalds and there are no kitchens in McDonalds. They mostly hire teenagers and even the managers some times are in their 20s.
Maybe you can negotiate that she will start looking for new jobs but will keep this one in the meantime.
Personally, I wouldn't want my daughter working there for long unless she was desperate. It has nothing to do with the kind of people or meat she will be working with; just rather it's not the work environment I want her to remain in for long.
@Sahar: whats wrong with working at McDonalds ? I think its a perfect place to pick a professional attitude and learn how to be responsible and manage themselves.
^ It's not something that I value as a prolonged work experience. There are plenty of places to learn to be professional. Serving people junk food is not my ideal. Working shouldn't be just about earning money.
apparently you dont know much about how it works at McDonalds so there is no point arguing with you any more. I hate to say this but your last post has the typical desi tone to it.
^ Uh, where did you argue with me at all? You asked me a question. I answered it. You have not specified anything that you disagree with me about, other than just that you think prolonged work at McD is okay and I don't. I don't think it is "bad." I know that they have a very good training program, in fact. I also know that they give various scholarships to their workers. I know they do good work and employ good people.
A lot of places do that. Like I said, I just don't would not want it as long term employment for my child.
I am sorry, I judged you. But no where in my posts I have advocated to make a career out of it. These jobs are meant to be a starting point for kids. Most of them work there for just few months anyway. You assumed and answered to a couple of things from my question which I dont stand for.
This reminds me of what happened when I was offered a temp job at Michaels. They only needed me for a day, but at the end of the day they said they liked my work ethic and offered me a full-time position. When I came home my mother said she hadn't had any peace the whole day thinking of me working in a shop. Though she knew there were lovely people who worked and shopped there, it just really bothered her. She told me that when she herself was younger and worked at a department store, it always bothered my nani, and only that day did she understand why.
When I was 17, my first job was at BK, after working there for few months, I never want to work at a fast food restaurant for long term. It was an okay first job for few months but that's about it. After few months, I found an on campus job and that job taught me skills, I wouldn't have learned/acquired from any restaurant job. I was lucky to have an Arab and desi manager on staff, they really helped me survive my few months, the hispanic staff I was working with was quite racist. I will prefer my children look for better opportunities.
^ It's not something that I value as a prolonged work experience. There are plenty of places to learn to be professional. Serving people junk food is not my ideal. Working shouldn't be just about earning money.
That's interesting. Is it the serving of bad quality food? (I can understand when people are against certain corporations/companies/industries)
^ Nah, it's not just that. Maybe it's the serving food thing. It's a good temporary job and an honest one. But the emphasis needs to be on temporary and the striving for something better, something more dignified (tho it is not without dignity that does not mean one should settle).
Maybe you can negotiate that she will start looking for new jobs but will keep this one in the meantime.
Personally, I wouldn't want my daughter working there for long unless she was desperate. It has nothing to do with the kind of people or meat she will be working with; just rather it's not the work environment I want her to remain in for long.
I can understand why parents wouldn't want their children working in fast food places...... but I'm not sure how realistic that is anymore, it's hard enough to get a job without any experience (like most teens are lacking). The kinds of jobs that are available for teens (I guess movie theaters, amusement parks, camps, fast food places, malls etc), I know alot of parents see that as "unrespectable" and that nothing outside of an office is respectable. At least I hope the thinking has changed since then....
Like I said, if you need the money, you work whatever decent job you can get. But if money is not a pressing issue, teens need to be focused on education and internships that provide them with far-reaching opportunities.
^ that's a sensible approach and I agree. I was typing out a small essay when I realized my experiences are more about post-college people struggling to look for work. not the same situation.
maybe give the job centre a try. Although they should be renamed the crappy job centre these days. When you walk past one you never see forensic detective required or accountant required. Its always customer-service-assistant-adviser required . "could you make the tea, for the guy who makes the coffees??"
sometimes, its quite difficult for a 15-16 yr old to get a job in any other place other than like a fast food joint or restaurant. She could try pharmacies or even hosipital gift shops... I know a friend of mine did that for awhile. Didnt pay as much other maccers (not that maccers pay is great) but it worked for her.
I have worked in a lot of different places since the legal age. Didnt HAVE to, but my dad thought it'd be good experience for me... infact, my first job was a maccers job.. I started when i was 14 and 9 months.. worked there for about 8 months.. then quit. Since then, I have worked in dodgy indian restaurants, grocery stores, retail, temping at Ford and then moving into a professional career.
Most of the jobs I went for (prior to working professionally), all valued the Maccers experience very high.. not sure why, but a lot of retail type managers do like their staff to have had that type of experience (here in OZ at least).
most of the desi community kiddos have all had some maccers/HJ/KFC experience.... mostly everyones first job here... lol :)
I dont find anything wrong with it. Its a different type of experience... can be a bit daunting for those who are still in HS.. I know in my case it was.
