hello, this is my first post so bear with me please. I am 22 years old and I live in England, I am currently at University (final year) studying biology and psychology. I’ve had gfs and stuff before, but I went to Pakistan last summer and met this (village) girl who is 20 and we are now engaged and we talk on the phone etc.
My point is, even though I am from a Pakistani family and I understand MOST of the culture, i don’t understand Pakistani girls from villages when it comes to marriage, love, intimacy etc. I know they are women and enjoy a male companion just as much as any woman in any country, but I’ve been to Pakistan and it’s very conservative in the villages and people are on the hush hush about this stuff (I don’t know why).
I have dated white girls from England and I understand them etc, just as they’d understand me in these issues. So i never had the intention of marrying a village girl from Pakistan BUT things happen and you meet people so here I am. I really like the girl I’m talking about, she’s pretty, funny, light skinned and tall BUT being from a village in Pakistan, I have a question to other Pakistani women who understand women from villages in Pakistan.
Do girls from villages in Pakistan enjoy the “coupley” stuff? What are the main differences between girls from here originally and girls who come over to England after living in a village for 20 years?
sorry if this is a bit long. If anyone needs clarification, just ask.
I think all women pretty much want the same thing from a relationship/marriage, regardless of where they are from. Just because she is from the village, doesnt mean she doesnt want to do "coupley" stuff, but like you mentioned, the village life is more conservative, so she may be shy to admit it, or to talk about it, or she is under the impression that it's "not proper" to discuss this stuff, especially before marriage. Maybe you can try to talk to her about it, but bring it up in casual conversation so she doesnt get uncomfortable, and then gauge her reaction to the conversation and take it from there.
Also, dont try to push her into a conversation that she is uncomfortable with. You can bring it up a few times, and just explain to her that you feel like she may be shy talking about this kind of stuff, but since you are going to be getting married, you want to know all her likes and dislikes, and that is why you want to talk about it, and tell her that you want her to feel comfortable with you.
If she has lived a very sheltered/conservative life, dont expect her to open up right away to you. Give her time, and show her understanding, because trust me, those are things that every girl looks for first, regardless of where they are from.
Yeah, how many times did you meet before agreeing to marry? You've mentioned you talk to her on the phone.. do you not get much of an idea on her views on 'coupley' stuff from those conversations or is she quite shy on there?
Ever heard the saying that still waters run deep? That said…them village girls are freaaaaaaaaaaakaaaayyyyy when it comes to “couply stuff.” They’re just feigning that shy, innocence.
@**M_was_here, **haha ye for me light skinned is a good feature but everyone is pretty in their own way And na it wasn’t arranged my next door neighbour in Pakistan introduced me to her and we spoke and you know how these things are, “fate” as they say.
@Deeba1234, we met a few times not exactly sure on the number. She used to be quite shy when we first spoke on the phone after i came back to England but she’s opened up more now and talks normally, I have spoken to her about honeymooney (is that a word) stuff with her, like where she would want to go etc. (I let her choose the place, because i don’t know Pakistan amazingly well) but I haven’t spoken to her about like more obvious stuff yet.
@redvelvet, LOL it doesn’t seem it! Whenever I go to Pakistan they are behind closed doors and when they do come out they look smile and run back in, so that is why I never got to “know” a village girl and how they are before Sunya (that’s her name) came along.
every girl has the same kinda dreams with respect to love and romance...
the only thing that you;re going to have to do in your situation is probably help her come out of her shell and be comfortable in being romantic....because she will want it but because of how she was raised she may not be comfortable initially...in fact most girls are shy about romance in the beginning...I grew up in the west and I am initially very shy too...its gonna be the same for her...
you will just need to bring her out of her shell but dont take her shyness to mean she doesnt want romance ...be aware of the culture she grew up in and realize it may take her some time to become comfy that is all
More seriously, I think you should reflect over why you're marrying her. Because she might be pretty and maybe you find her innocence charming...and the looks can sometimes sway a person's ability to think clearly.....but do you think you and her are compatible? Do you really have chemistry...do you connect intellecutally/emotionaly/belief systems/temperaments/goals/humor? Apart from romantic/sexual compatible......what about other issues?
Another one with a history now going to Pakistan to marry.
Please find someone in UK, white black whatever, please don't ruin an innocent girl's life. Yes this is coming from a guy.
hello, this is my first post so bear with me please. I am 22 years old and I live in England, I am currently at University (final year) studying biology and psychology. I've had gfs and stuff before, but I went to Pakistan last summer and met this (village) girl who is 20 and we are now engaged and we talk on the phone etc.
My point is, even though I am from a Pakistani family and I understand MOST of the culture, i don't understand Pakistani girls from villages when it comes to marriage, love, intimacy etc. I know they are women and enjoy a male companion just as much as any woman in any country, but I've been to Pakistan and it's very conservative in the villages and people are on the hush hush about this stuff (I don't know why).
I have dated white girls from England and I understand them etc, just as they'd understand me in these issues. So i never had the intention of marrying a village girl from Pakistan BUT things happen and you meet people so here I am. I really like the girl I'm talking about, she's pretty, funny, light skinned and tall BUT being from a village in Pakistan, I have a question to other Pakistani women who understand women from villages in Pakistan.
Do girls from villages in Pakistan enjoy the "coupley" stuff? What are the main differences between girls from here originally and girls who come over to England after living in a village for 20 years?
sorry if this is a bit long. If anyone needs clarification, just ask.
Thanks.
your relation shouldnt be troubling only if (according to me) she has got education.. its not about if she is not educated, she is illitrate..never! but this fact can not be denied that.. it MAKES the difference! because you are brought up here and she not only in Pakistan but a VILLAGE, so ofcourse, there is a difference! you talk to her..you know her better.. you should be able to judge her by now.. she is from the completetly different environment.. home sickness can be another issue.. still, I wish you all the best..
rest, regarding love/ intimacy... woman of any part of world wants a companion for her.. thats human nature.. but differences of minds create a lot of fuss to get intimated..!
And na it wasn’t arranged my next door neighbour in Pakistan introduced me to her and we spoke and you know how these things are, “fate” as they say.
