Re: he doesn't care
I can bet you he's your first bf ever too, that's why all the boo hoo over every fight. Believe me, ending it will be the best thing you can do for your life.
Re: he doesn’t care
Girl .. you gota get over this dude and get rid of him .. what kinda dude is he who makes someone wait that long …
sorry to say .. but this aint never gona work out between you twos .. if hes being like this before marraige .. which is gona take like in a gazillion years time .. then think about it how is he gona be reacting towards ya AFTER the marraige…
and follow the next three things and am sure 100% you ll be fine… and things will turn out better but you gota get rid of this idiot…
CONFIDENCE:
1 Day all villagers decided to pray for rain.
On the day of prayer all people gathered & only one boy come with umbrella. THATS CONFIDENCE.
TRUST:
Trust should be like feeling of a 1 year old baby, when you throw him in tha air, he laughs…
Because he know you will catch him…
HOPE:
Every night we go to bed, have no assurance to get up alive in the next morning
But still we have many plans for coming day…
KEEP CONFIDENCE, TRUST IN GOD AND NEVER LOSE HOPE…
Re: he doesn't care
all those who r not here to understand what i am saying, to sympathise with me and give me any sincere advice, but just to pass judgements
GET THE EFF OUT
Re: he doesn't care
dont pick up his phone..or call him..until/unless he has his parents start 'the talk' with your family....at this point..you guys should have been married...if he is serious...
otherwise its all just talk.
Re: he doesn't care
how can i break with him when i just cant live without him :(
i cant live without him :(
Re: he doesn't care
then dont try to use cheap words..i will stop passing judgements ..OK !!!!!
Re: he doesn't care
divine-light
who are you to judge whats cheap?
i think you are being cheap here OK
Re: he doesn't care
Sabriya girl yeah he's my first
and how do i find the strength to end it?
Re: he doesn't care
its not break up...its initiative....you need to wake him up..some guys need it.....i know it is hard...but since it is not in his nature to be all enthusiastic about such things...you ll be making it happen...and sara....be ready for being this 'taking initiative' sort for the rest of your life...if you want to spend your life with him. You have to understand the nature of your man....in order to be with him....you cant let your guard down...or present yourself as a vulnerable...be strong...and help him take action...but the key is....indirectly..
Re: he doesn't care
all those who r not here to understand what i am saying, to sympathise with me and give me any sincere advice, but just to pass judgements
GET THE EFF OUT
girly .. heres your problem number one... if not the last.. you have a attitude problem.... we re here to think best for someone... and then thers you with rupulsive language... which definately dont help the sittuation.....
oh well .. Good Luck to a down hill relationship...oops which aint PROBABLY wernt there in the first place and this dude just made you think he wants ya ....
Trust us .. some of us here .. like sis sabriyah786 is talking from her close experience ....but then again.. those who wana hear good advice which is good for them they aint like yourself.
Re: he doesn't care
chanda
you're right yaara
but tell me...isnt that a cruel way to do it? i cant deal with being away from him and not being in touch with him :(
i love him yaar i need to hear his voice i need to see him i need to be with him...i just cant handle not being together
ask me to do anything BUT that :S
Re: he doesn't care
Sara, give him an ultimatum, and then stick to your words. TEll him he has x number of days, or weeks, or months to get the marriage talks started between both families, otherwise you've had it enough and need to move on. That should solve it.
I know the advice some people here are giving is not the kind you want to hear, but you have to think outside the box. WE are looking from all possible perspectives and advising you, without being blinded by emotion. Take it into consideration at the very least.
Re: he doesn't care
in men, this is quite common, han?
it is v. sad to recount it, but for its educative aspect, see this below.
a man who would say i came after you because i like you, but don’t get emotionally attached to me, then he proposes you, then tells you that that his mom wants a girl way younger than him from Pakistan, that his sister's husband wanted his sister to marry him to her, his uncle wants him to marry his niece, that a woman at the work place like me, that the girl from before wasted my emotions, that his aunts tell his mother to look elsewhere for him, while he is speaking to this woman who has given him respect, and then he revokes his proposal and in less than a few weeks, is yet again, committed at the bidding of his parents or his own deceiving nature.
i wish him well with his absolute deceit, insensitivity, confusion and runaway spirit.
a man would never ever be able to disclose this level of commitment to anyone. he will not be able to publicly speak of this whole affair like this as a man may not, was not or is still not, truthfully aware of his own self.
and it is v. sad, v. disappointing and a lesson for him as well for the person whom he betrayed so selfishly and insulted her pure and kind feelings of bonding, just like that.
& so much else that has no place to be shared in this thread.
in any event, the emphasis in Pakistani Muslim society and families is thought to be, & heard to be that young single men are strong on their choices, they are able to make their decisions, they honor their own words, they are listened to by their parents, or they have integrity of character.
men must not propose women who they are incapable of marrying.
there is none of that strength, that one can discern here above, is there?
and arshad5, your comment may be right, but it in itself did not say anything in the way of solution for the sake of women's dignity who do give respect but the other side is incapable of accepting that respect..
any thoughts?
best,
Dushwari
You see girls wasting years ..or the best years of the marriageable age with one guy and eventually the guy ditches her and marries someone else.
Re: he doesn't care
fbi i was talking to divine not you
Re: he doesn't care
^^^yep...if he wants you...he will.....you need to support the idea of marriage....because thats what you want...you dont want to be a girlfriend for the rest of your life...so do it....have talk..and give him the ultimatum..
Re: he doesn't care
talks between the family have started already
his parents came to my house, they didnt respond to my parents in a couple weeks
then his parents met me, and told me they will talk to my parents
he says that after talking to my parents again, his parents will talk to his family (which is when major explosions are expected)
and i dont know how many effing steps will happen after that
Re: he doesn't care
If you cannot contribute without getting judgemental please refrain from posting.
Re: he doesn't care
WHY?..because...men in our pakistani society..are treated as babies by their parents...and that really sucks for a girl...because she ends up complaining for the rest of her life..about how incompetent he has proved to be as a husband...they ll be wonderful sons....but they forget about their wives....(again..this is a general statement..and i am not proving anything)
Re: he doesn't care
Sara, dont worry about it then, at least marraige talks have started. Pray for the best, but just to be safe, expect the worst to avoid disappointment.
Re: he doesn't care
[quote="divine-light"]
-quote]
Wow thats a little harsh dont you think? If you dont have anything nice to say, dont say anything at all in this regard :)