Having 4 wifes is WRONG?

[wunderkind]

Re: Having 4 wifes is WRONG?

@Mamaof3

I have met more than a fair share of polygamists over there. I guess I've met 5 or 6 polygamist men. They were without exception strutting roosters whose first wives were heartbroken but unable to divorce and so they remain trapped with their dckhead husbands who strut around while people just laugh at them behind their backs. 4 of the 6 that I met had their second wives because the 2nd one got pregnant and they did the - lol - "honorable" - thing by marrying them. The other 2 married girls that were almost as young as their own children. Spent their time in the bedroom with the little girls they married and when they werent doing that, they were bragging about it all. Somehow, I think if youre going to be that disgusting then you should keep your mouth shut and hire a prostitute for an hour or 3 to take care of your grossness to prevent the heartbreak that it causes for your wife, your children, your wifes family - and probably even your own family. I get so beside-myself-mad when I hear ANYONE proclaim that "ALLAH says its ok" then I see THIS SHEET....these families destroyed...the heartbreak it causes. How can ANYONE condone this kind of thing?????? And actually say (or think) that they can get by with it on the day of Judgement?!

It's a religious practice. No-one gives two hoots about how some might find themselves with heartache because of it: religion sanctions it and that is the end of the matter. You've got no right to tamper with our religion to make our society suit your vision of what is right and fair.

[moin.ul.atiq]

Re: Having 4 wifes is WRONG?

@PyariCgudia

I think most muslims understand that polygamy isn't promoted over monogamy in Islam.

Its the question of what circumstances is it allowed under, and can lust be a valid reason for polygamy. That's what usually gets everyone's panties in a twist.

Hello Sister, Islam permits having upto 4 wives if there are solid reasons behind it.. like you are not able to produce kids with one wife- you should marry another wife to have kids.. or if you are in love with another woman, you can take your wife's permission and marry the other girl.. However, if your wife doesn't allow you to marry and is healthy to make kids, you shouldn't have more than one wife.. I know many families in Pakistan who have more than 2 wives and they live happily with each other.. Polygamy is only a problem in the west but not in the Muslim world.

[Mamaof3]

Re: Having 4 wifes is WRONG?

If you find that you cannot give 2 hoots because you've caused the heartbreak of your first wife and the children that you have with her then you deserve all that you will get on your judgement day. If you think for one moment that you can get away with more than one wife for no other reason than that, then you're no better than the 50 year old perverts who strut around with their 14 year old second "wives".

And Ms Moin, I have no issue whatsoever with families who jointly decide that another wife is the thing to do. Thats exactly the way it should be, most especially when its for a cause that its MEANT for - but I've never seen that in my travels. Only I've seen perverts who think they're Gods gift to womanhood.

[wunderkind]

Re: Having 4 wifes is WRONG?

@Mamaof3

If you find that you cannot give 2 hoots because you've caused the heartbreak of your first wife and the children that you have with her then you deserve all that you will get on your judgement day. If you think for one moment that you can get away with more than one wife for no other reason than that, then you're no better than the 50 year old perverts who strut around with their 14 year old second "wives".

Don't you understand that Pakistan is an Islamic nation and it must be made fully Islamic?

[Mamaof3]

Re: Having 4 wifes is WRONG?

...and that means....? and it voids anything I've said???? It makes it ok to go against the wishes of your first wife and bring in a pregnant 15 year old child that you got your hands on?? And this teaches the children of your first wife WHAT exactly?? And it follows the teachings of Islaam .... how?

[Impulse]

Re: Having 4 wifes is WRONG?

@Sara516

Er if ur man won't marry another girl then WHY you geting ur panties in a twist? WHY is ti such a problem for yOU???

im not a selfish who only discusses things that affect me directly. If neither me nor anyone in my family suffers from heart disease/cancer/diabetes.....its wrong for me to address these problems?

unlike you, I dont discuss things that just affect me...

I have personally seen and heard of women who's husbands have married more than once....and mostly its the type of guys who are the perverted that check out any girl they see. and ive seen what its done to these women.

[Impulse]

Re: Having 4 wifes is WRONG?

@Mamaof3

Ms angel, try to understand what I'm getting at here. I mean eating PORK is ALSO ok....if you're starving and theres nothing else to eat, yeah?

Polygamy is no different.

If something is OK to do WITHIN certain limits, then those limits should be adhered to with extreme caution and with the understanding that there ARE limits and reasons in the first place.

Just saying "heck, its ALLOWED" just doesnt cut it.

I agree with you Mamaof3, these same people who say "heck its allowed" are the ones giving islam a bad name nowadays.....with saying everything is acceptable.....I wouldnt be surprised if these same ppl agree to suicide bombing....and what not.

[Impulse]

Re: Having 4 wifes is WRONG?

@AnGeL EyEs

there is a difference b/w eating pork and marrying up to 4 wives...one is halal the other is haram....no matter which way u look at it you cant compare the 2.

also....plz give me the ayah which states that marrying up to 4 wives is ONLY permissible if it's a "charity case"...i nvr recall reading such a thing. :)

I know that men tend to take this "right" to their advantage....and they do it for all the wrong reasons. This is unacceptable in Islam!! Regardless.... for those that do it for the right reasons and do it justly......it is their RIGHT....and should not be looked down upon.

ok Angel Eyes....you enjoy living with your husbands 3 other wives....and be proud of it....that your husband loves you so much that he wants to have 3 other wives for that reason

[Sara516]

Re: Having 4 wifes is WRONG?

^ Heart disease/cancer/diabetes, they could potentially affect you or your family…plus you’re in the health profession, so yes it does affect you because it is part of your job to address these issues, therefore that is a bad analogy.

Fact of the matter is, polygamy IS a part of Islam, whether you like it or not. Whatever someone’s intentions behind marrying another woman are, that’s not up to us to decide. There are worse things that Muslims do in the name of religion, that Pakistanis do in Pakistan that actually have no basis in religion, UNLIKE POLYGAMY which is a part of our religion–why dn’t we discuss those issues? Buss shukar karo that your husband/boyfriend will never do that to you.
Maybe it’s just me but I’ve gotten kinda bored and tired with arguing over the stupidest things and that too, on an internet message board. Guess i have better things to do

[hussain87]

Re: Having 4 wifes is WRONG?

^now thas quite balanced reply.:D .having four wives is not wrong treating them like dirt is wrong....and ppl stop comparing something haraam as pork to something which allah made halal for us:o ...

[Impulse]

Re: Having 4 wifes is WRONG?

@Mamaof3

...and that means....? and it voids anything I've said???? It makes it ok to go against the wishes of your first wife and bring in a pregnant 15 year old child that you got your hands on?? And this teaches the children of your first wife WHAT exactly?? And it follows the teachings of Islaam .... how?

Mamaof3...there are some people who Allah says in the quran that he has made deaf dumb and blind.....no matter how much you tell them something they'll never agree. Allah has given us all a brain for a reason so that we use it.....everything that Islam permits/forbids has a very good reason behind it.....

Allah says the man has to treat them equally....that is IMPOSSIBLE and Allah even tells us that! hence its not allowed....but thats the part where we have to use our brains to work out what Allah has said in the Quran. This is the part where people with low IQs get confused.

Just be happy that you're masha-allah married to a guy who understands this :)

if polygamy was allowed....Allah wouldnt have said in the Quran that its IMPOSSIBLE. Read the following two ayahs:

"If you fear lest you may not be perfectly equitable in treating more than one wife, then you shall be content with one." (4:3) **
**"You cannot be equitable in a polygamous relationship, no matter how hard you try." (4:129)

one verse is an explanation of the other....it says you can only marry if you treat them equal but you cant treat them equal....HENCE only marry one.
Its easy for me to understand....but then again we all have different levels of IQ.

[moin.ul.atiq]

Re: Having 4 wifes is WRONG?

@Sara516

^ Heart disease/cancer/diabetes, they could potentially affect you or your family…plus you’re in the health profession, so yes it does affect you because it is part of your job to address these issues, therefore that is a bad analogy.

Fact of the matter is, polygamy IS a part of Islam, whether you like it or not. Whatever someone’s intentions behind marrying another woman are, that’s not up to us to decide. There are worse things that Muslims do in the name of religion, that Pakistanis do in Pakistan that actually have no basis in religion, UNLIKE POLYGAMY which is a part of our religion–why dn’t we discuss those issues? Buss shukar karo that your husband/boyfriend will never do that to you.
Maybe it’s just me but I’ve gotten kinda bored and tired with arguing over the stupidest things and that too, on an internet message board. Guess i have better things to do

I guess you are an Indian who doesn’t have a clue about Islam or Pakistan.. having multiple wives is justified as I said in my post only when it is necessary to do so.. When you r wife can’t have baby for a long time, or is disabled to do day-to-day chores like cooking food, washing clothes etc.. Also, it is only done under the strict guidance of a Moulvi.. Islam is the best religion and it has solution for everything..

[Sara516]

Re: Having 4 wifes is WRONG?

@moin.ul.atiq

I guess you are an Indian who doesn't have a clue about Islam or Pakistan.. having multiple wives is justified as I said in my post only when it is necessary to do so.. When you r wife can't have baby for a long time, or is disabled to do day-to-day chores like cooking food, washing clothes etc.. Also, it is only done under the strict guidance of a Moulvi.. Islam is the best religion and it has solution for everything..

I wonder if you can understand the difference between a fact and an opinion. This is what I said, and I am quoting for your help: polygamy IS a part of Islam. I did not say anywhere that its under thsi condition or htat the conditions YOU stated were wrong. All I said was that polygamy IS a part of Islam. That is a fact (i.e., something that's true). How it's justified, when it's right/wrong, those are opinions/speculation, NOT facts.

I don't see how you can so easily conclude that I am Indian just by that. Btw how can you assum ethat I am Indian who does nto know bout Islam? Or are you one of those people who believes there are no Muslims in India?.

[hussain87]

Re: Having 4 wifes is WRONG?

@moin.ul.atiq

I guess you are an Indian who doesn’t have a clue about Islam or Pakistan…

paa jee itna gharam hoon dey lorh ney…har aik indian ney hoonda sirf kuch lokaan nou thora jiya asar ho jaandai unhain haar rehn sehn te gallaaan karne da…akhir filmaan dekhnain da kuch te asar hoonda na...

[AnGeL_EyEs]

Re: Having 4 wifes is WRONG?

edit

:)

[Impulse]

Re: Having 4 wifes is WRONG?

^what did u say that was so bad that u had to edit it?

[moin.ul.atiq]

Re: Having 4 wifes is WRONG?

@hussain87

paa jee itna gharam hoon dey lorh ney…har aik indian ney hoonda sirf kuch lokaan nou thora jiya asar ho jaandai unhain haar rehn sehn te gallaaan karne da…akhir filmaan dekhnain da kuch te asar hoonda na...

O kakay, hun mein ki dassan? Ai kuriyaan ultiyaan gallan kardi nay.. I have to tell them to respect Islam…

[moin.ul.atiq]

Re: Having 4 wifes is WRONG?

@Sara516

I wonder if you can understand the difference between a fact and an opinion. This is what I said, and I am quoting for your help: polygamy IS a part of Islam. I did not say anywhere that its under thsi condition or htat the conditions YOU stated were wrong. All I said was that polygamy IS a part of Islam. That is a fact (i.e., something that's true). How it's justified, when it's right/wrong, those are opinions/speculation, NOT facts.

I don't see how you can so easily conclude that I am Indian just by that. Btw how can you assum ethat I am Indian who does nto know bout Islam? Or are you one of those people who believes there are no Muslims in India?.

Thanks for clarifying that you are Pakistani, sister.. Polygamy could be the term for the westerners but not for Pakistanis.. As a Pakistani and muslims we have full rights to have more than 1 wife but only when needed and as per our moulvi's consent.. I am not sure you're married but if your husband decides to marry another wife- you should respect that decision and treat his new wife as your sister.. I have seen a family with 4 wives living happily in Pakistan. I hope you wear Hijaab all the timer, sister :)

[Sara516]

Re: Having 4 wifes is WRONG?

^ Ah in fact, only reason I am not so up in arms about this polygamy thing is because i AM married and my husband will never marry another woman. Uss ki marzi, i’ve given him full ijazat.

[moin.ul.atiq]

Re: Having 4 wifes is WRONG?

@Sara516

^ Ah in fact, only reason I am not so up in arms about this polygamy thing is because i AM married and my husband will never marry another woman. Uss ki marzi, i’ve given him full ijazat.

Okay, sister.. but if he marries, he has full rights to do so.. mera khayal hai aap meri gal samajh gay.. tuada wada shukriya