which has come back to haunt you many a times? Maybe took a wrong decision, or mislead someone or treated someone REALLY BADLY or anything.
Maybe something you did like an year ago or more than that, or something more recent?
How do you get over this bad feeling?
Re: Have you ever done something..
which has come back to haunt you many a times? Maybe took a wrong decision, or mislead someone or treated someone REALLY BADLY or anything.
Maybe something you did like an year ago or more than that, or something more recent?
How do you get over this bad feeling?
1) If your mistake was an accident, then don't beat yourself up over it. We weren't created perfect.....we were designed to make mistakes. Everyone in this world has committed an unintentional mistake time and time again. Did you learn from it? If you have...that's all that matters.
2) If your mistake was intentional.....but you learned from it.......don't beat yourself up over it in this case either. We all have committed intentional mistakes as well.
3) If you can make amends for it then do so. This can entail treating the person (whom you've offended) in a better way......or apologizing to them. That can bring peace of mind.
4) If you feel that confronting the individual might cause more problems. Then you can make amends in a more indirect way. For example, if you gossiped about them........then help to restore their reputation by speaking well of them in a gathering. That's an option, for example. Or make dua for the person. Ask Allah for forgiveness, that can bring peace.
5) While "feeling bad" is an uncomfortable state to be in.......see the "good" in this feeling. The "good" is that this indicates that you have a conscience......and that it works......and that you have the ability to feel remorse for your actions and to learn from your mistakes. Not everyone has this ability. Some people are too callous to apologize and moreover don't think they're capable of being wrong.
Re: Have you ever done something..
There was a girl in college (A-levels) who I and a couple of my friends really hated. She had a dark skin tone and was very sensitive about it and once I called her coal face and she started crying right then and there!
But the worst thing was when we planned to "bump" into her. I'd been going to the gym for about 6 month then and somehow I got this crazy thought that I should test my shoulder strength. Of course I couldn't do it right. It was supposed to look like accident but I ended up smashing my shoulder into her. She was less than 5 feet and thin as a rake so, well u can guess....
It became a really big issue back then, our parents were called and I was suspended for 3 days. Seems so stupid now that I think about it, but at that time it was the most fun thing I'd ever done lol
Re: Have you ever done something..
RV I want to make things better because my mistake was intentional but I did learn from it. It's eating me from inside. I even made a blog entry on it earlier, I don't know but I feel so bad. I want to apologise but it's like that person has disappeared or something. They changed their number, I can't see them online or anything. It's not like I want them back in my life but at least just give me a chance to explain.
I have become a stalker because of them. I just want to find them so I can say sorry.
Re: Have you ever done something..
That's not nice man, but you are right, in college and in your fun days, people do crazy and stupid things. I am assuming you are a grown up now and working/in practical life. Did you apologise to her?
There was a girl in college (A-levels) who I and a couple of my friends really hated. She had a dark skin tone and was very sensitive about it and once I called her coal face and she started crying right then and there!
But the worst thing was when we planned to "bump" into her. I'd been going to the gym for about 6 month then and somehow I got this crazy thought that I should test my shoulder strength. Of course I couldn't do it right. It was supposed to look like accident but I ended up smashing my shoulder into her. She was less than 5 feet and thin as a rake so, well u can guess....
It became a really big issue back then, our parents were called and I was suspended for 3 days. Seems so stupid now that I think about it, but at that time it was the most fun thing I'd ever done lol
Re: Have you ever done something..
They changed their number, I can't see them online or anything. It's not like I want them back in my life but at least just give me a chance to explain.
What about other methods of communication? Email? Are they on Facebook? Do you have a home address? Do you KNOW someone who might know this person......and might have their contact information?
Re: Have you ever done something..
which has come back to haunt you many a times? Maybe took a wrong decision, or mislead someone or treated someone REALLY BADLY or anything.
Maybe something you did like an year ago or more than that, or something more recent?
How do you get over this bad feeling?
If it was a wrong decision, you just have to be confident in the fact that if you had made another decision, who knows how things may have worked out. The question is kind of vague, but that's how it usually is.....with regards to choosing a spouse, school, career etc. Also, most decisions can be reversed.....not all but some.
If you treated someone badly, well you can always speak to them and apologize.
Other than that, you just pray to become a better, stronger person.
Re: Have you ever done something..
There was a girl in college (A-levels) who I and a couple of my friends really hated. She had a dark skin tone and was very sensitive about it and once I called her coal face and she started crying right then and there!
But the worst thing was when we planned to "bump" into her. I'd been going to the gym for about 6 month then and somehow I got this crazy thought that I should test my shoulder strength. Of course I couldn't do it right. It was supposed to look like accident but I ended up smashing my shoulder into her. She was less than 5 feet and thin as a rake so, well u can guess....
It became a really big issue back then, our parents were called and I was suspended for 3 days. Seems so stupid now that I think about it, but at that time it was the most fun thing I'd ever done lol
I wonder how your upbringing was that you consider bringing physical harm to someone funny?
Re: Have you ever done something..
Didn't try very hard. Sent her a SMS saying sorry after the bumping incident because my parents basically forced me to. No contact since then...
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I wonder how your upbringing was that bringing physical harm to someone is considered "funny".
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Isn't that called bullying? I don't see where upbringing comes in.
Re: Have you ever done something..
They barely reply to my email any more. Most of the times I get paranoid and think they don't care about me and have blocked me from MSN and Gmail. They were but I am sure that either they disabled their account or have blocked me. I can't see their name when I search for it. They never gave me their home address. I did know one person that knew them but the person won't cooperate in telling me where they live etc.
What about other methods of communication? Email? Are they on Facebook? Do you have a home address? Do you KNOW someone who might know this person......and might have their contact information?
Re: Have you ever done something..
Is there another person that might have an idea and will be more willing to cooperate? Any mutual friends that you both may have had? How about family friends (aunties, for example) that might have an idea?
Re: Have you ever done something..
It's something between treating someone badly and being annoying. I don't know how exactly they got repulsed by me. I hope to become a better and stronger person. Also not to repeat my mistakes. iA
If it was a wrong decision, you just have to be confident in the fact that if you had made another decision, who knows how things may have worked out. The question is kind of vague, but that's how it usually is.....with regards to choosing a spouse, school, career etc. Also, most decisions can be reversed.....not all but some.
If you treated someone badly, well you can always speak to them and apologize.
Other than that, you just pray to become a better, stronger person.
Re: Have you ever done something..
Didn't try very hard. Sent her a SMS saying sorry after the bumping incident because my parents basically forced me to. No contact since then...
Isn't that called bullying? I don't see where upbringing comes in.
Yes what you did to that poor girl is considered bullying. :)
Re: Have you ever done something..
Well at least you sent an apology text.
Didn't try very hard. Sent her a SMS saying sorry after the bumping incident because my parents basically forced me to. No contact since then...
Isn't that called bullying? I don't see where upbringing comes in.
Is there another person that might have an idea and will be more willing to cooperate? Any mutual friends that you both may have had? How about family friends (aunties, for example) that might have an idea?
RV, this is exactly why I feel even more bad. I don't have any idea about their whereabouts. The area they were in, last I heard they shifted to some other area. Very private about their life. None of our mutual friends know why they have suddenly gone MIA.
Re: Have you ever done something..
Allah knows what's in our hearts and what our intentions. Pray to Allah for forgiveness and pray that He open the opportunity for you to make amends in the future. This reflects your sincerity and I think it may provide some relief or peace.
Re: Have you ever done something..
If the person isn't going to reply to you then just leave it. Pray for their goodness and well being and pray to become a better person.
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I feel bad because I blame myself for their disappearance and for them to be quiet. I really loved and respected that person. Went out of my way. Now that they are no longer in my life, when I remember them, I become really sad. Also cry sometimes. RV I have tried praying to Allah but it doesn't work. I feel bad all the time. I can't stop missing them.
Re: Have you ever done something..
Better person with who people would like to stick around with. iA
If the person isn't going to reply to you then just leave it. Pray for their goodness and well being and pray to become a better person.
Re: Have you ever done something..
A short term memory is always good . Everything that come back and haunt me is always new . :D
Re: Have you ever done something..
Um that doesn't make sense. lol so you mean to say you don't want a medium term and long term memory storage in your mind? :P