Re: haq meher
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There are two portions of Meher
The portion which is payable immediately, is called the** Mehr-e-Mu'ajjal**. Word Mu'ajjal comes from Ujlat (with Aain) and means hasten or immediately. This is the portion that bride can forgive if she wants to but the portion is due on the first night
The other portion is called Mehr-e-Mu'wajjal. Word Mu'wajjal (with "Wow") comes from the word "Ajal" (with Alif) which means end. So this portion is due at the end of the contract (marriage) and cannot be forgiven.
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i think this is just a pakistani thing. islamically there is only one mahr, not two. the bride can ask for what she wants, it shouldnt even be decided by her parents, because it is for her not them, so it is her right to ask and the groom can entertain her request and negociate if need be. but she should take the groom's situation into account and not put a burden on him. there is a hadith that says the marriage that has the least cost has the most barakah, because it shouldnt be a hardship for them and make it difficult for them to get married [like if groom has to save for many years to afford the mahr]. for some $100 is not easy for them and for others $100,000 is very easy for them, so it always varies from individual to individual. some people ask for huge amounts thinking it is meant to be a security blanket in case of divorce, this is not the correct way. the mahr should be paid whenever the bride asks after marriage, if she asks for it right after consumation it must be paid then. if it isnt paid by the time of divorce, it is due then. if it isnt paid by time of death of husband, then it is paid in full to her from his wealth before the rest of the inheritance is divided. if the marriage ends before consumation, then it is paid half. the wife has the right to forgive it if she wishes, but it is her right to have it and use as she wishes, and she shouldnt be shy to ask for it and none can force her to give it up. some people set huge mahrs and then the girl never gets a penny from it. better to set something reasonable that is actually given to her