what was your haq meher?
Re: haq meher
i was also gonna ask this question .. i always thought haq mehar is a woman's right .. she can ask anything .. anything reasonable .. n her husband should give it to her right a way .. but i guess in our tradition u get haq mehar only when u r divorced .. i think thats the wrong way of doing it ..
i m getting married in few days .. n my parents r goona right down 100 $ as haq mahar .. i was thinking of something else but yet thats the tradition couldn't argue with my parents ..
Re: haq meher
There are 2 mehers...one that is due immediately after the wedding...sort of like a gift that a woman can forgive if she decides to. It can be cash or something else. The other meher is the cash that is predecided as well and is given upon divorce. However, if the woman takes khula, the husband is not obligated to give her that.
Re: haq meher
There are 2 mehers...one that is due immediately after the wedding...sort of like a gift that a woman can forgive if she decides to. It can be cash or something else. The other meher is the cash that is predecided as well and is given upon divorce. However, if the woman takes khula, the husband is not obligated to give her that.
I think it is just one amount stated in the Nikah Nama............
half is due before Rukhsati or the consumation of marraige........the second half is due in case of a divorce........
Islam started the pre-nuptual agreement tradition 1400 yrs ago...........
Re: haq meher
SindSagar, I'm not sure it is half...actually I'm quite sure they are two different amounts as I recall from my own experience.
Re: haq meher
It was a big decision for us when we were doing the Nikkah. I even thought of forgiving it and we then spoke to the Imam. He told me I can let it go if I want to but Islamically, it's my right and gift from my husband so I should ask for it. He told us of a hadith which I don't remember exactly at this time but it was something about when Hazrat Ali R.A got married to Prophet Muhammad's (PBUH) daughter, he told Hazrat Ali R.A to give her something that belonged to him. He didn't have much so he gave her his coat or jacket which he was wearing.
In Pakistan, people just make up their own stuff and follow them such as paying mehr upon divorce, that's not what Islam tells you to do. Ideally, the wife should receive it at the time of Nikkah but if the husband is not financially stable then with the consent of his wife, it can be delayed till he's able to pay that amount. It only belongs to the wife, the purpose is for her to save it/keep it incase there's a seperation/divorce or god forbid something happens to the husband. This way she has something to fall back on. Therefore, the amount shouldn't be too low and neither too high, Islam suggests moderation in everything. Set an amount which is reasonable enough and your which husband will be able to give you without falling into debt.
I have heard of families setting anywhere between $50,000 to $100,000 if the guy is a doctor or lawyer. That's ridiculous. The purpose of haq-e-mehr isn't to lootify your husband, it's for him to give his wife an amount to get by incase of unfortunate circumstances. Also, families and relatives like to be a huge part of how much the amount should be, that's so wrong. It should only be the husband and wife deciding on it. The elders can be present when the couple is setting the amount but they shouldn't interfere. Recently we heard of a Nikkah where both the families along with bride and groom were sitting in the masjid waiting for the Nikkah to happen and when the Imam asked what amount they had decided, everyone was clueless. The parents then stepped in saying they will talk about it for a few minutes and let him know but the Imam said NO, this is a matter between the couple, they get to make this decision, the family doesn't. It makes alot of sense too because families can be really pressurizing and sometimes it can cause alot of stress and tension between both parties.
Re: haq meher
There are two portions of Meher
The portion which is payable immediately, is called the** Mehr-e-Mu'ajjal**. Word Mu'ajjal comes from Ujlat (with Aain) and means hasten or immediately. This is the portion that bride can forgive if she wants to but the portion is due on the first night
The other portion is called Mehr-e-Mu'wajjal. Word Mu'wajjal (with "Wow") comes from the word "Ajal" (with Alif) which means end. So this portion is due at the end of the contract (marriage) and cannot be forgiven.
Re: haq meher
^Haww, how come noone told us about Mehr-e-Mu’wajjal? I need to call Raheel and set it now 
Re: haq meher
And Mu'ajjal amount is not subtracted from Mu'wajjal right?
Re: haq meher
That is the one set incase of divorce and this one is noted on the nikaah nama. It must be there.
Re: haq meher
^We were never told about it. The Imam asked us for only one amount of mehr, and that's what noted on the Nikah nama.
Re: haq meher
Both amounts should be set separately at the time of Nikah and it should be documented in the Nikah nama form. Look at line 13, 14 and 15
Re: haq meher
Shay, the Imam probably didn't mention the first meher as you were not getting rukhsatified at that time.
Re: haq meher
But he didn't know we weren't getting rukhsatified.. he was some srilankan Imam and we never bothered to tell him about nikkah and rukhsati. He just asked my dad what amount I had set and noted it on the paper. He then confirmed it with Raheel and that was it. We told him I didn't want the mehr right away. Dang, I just realized I don't even remember how much my mehr was.
Re: haq meher
stupid question: Mehr-e-Mu'ajjal is that "moun dakhai" in Pakistan?
Re: haq meher
stupid question: Mehr-e-Mu'ajjal is that "moun dakhai" in Pakistan?
Moun Dikhai can be taken as **Mehr-e-Mu'ajjal, **if dulhan agrees to that.
Shay, check your Nikah Form, it should all be listed in the Nikah Form.
Re: haq meher
TLK, Niksik and shay,
i recently had my nikah i enquired about this. the answer from the elders in my family who know fiqh in detail from a hanafi pov was thus.
mehr is a gift the husband is instructed to give and cannot (should not) be refused by the wife. there is one mehr amount given on the pakistani nikkah nama. the next question in the list is what amount was paid immediately (if any, it can all be deferred) and what amount is deferred (so in my case it was all deferred). this is not deferred until/in the case of divorce but to a time decided by the wife which she should let the husband know after the nikah e.g. when he can afford it/in 2 years time/on his first wages...... but this is not mentoined on the nikah nama unless of course the wife wants a record of it.
Re: haq meher
^^ Hmm .. I have an image file of Pakistani Nikah Nama form (in Urdu) and line 14 does mention both meher types
Re: haq meher
^I noticed that on the other nikahnama you posted as well. Now both R and I are confused. He's saying you'll get half of whatever I have by default anyway if we are seperated. Do you think we need to make changes to the nikahnama? It seems like the Imam left the second part blank.
Re: haq meher
both types are there but my understanding is that it can be all prompt, all deferred, or a combination of both.
so for mine, i had Mu’ajjal- none, (none was prompt)
Mu’wajjal - all (and then the amount given in the previous question)