So as everyone know i got married last year and couldn’t be happier. Recently, one of my wife’s friend, call her A. A was our mutual family friend of ours before we got married. A recently finished her residency and work at same hospital as i do here. A is single girl and before i married my wife, me and A talked for a bit for marriage purpose. But didn’t end up working out. So my wife feels for strange reason that she is liking me. And i had no clue until my wife told me yesterday. When i asked her why would she even think like that. Instead of giving me reason she got angry and asking me that why would I be interested to know. So here i am clueless what have i done wrong?.
Our married life is great but sometimes i feel she just gets angry for no reason. Its not like i talk to girl A outside work. Except we are at work and grab coffee together. Which my wife knows. I mean if my wife is feeling bit jealous i am willing to do anything but i want her to talk about it. Instead of keeping it in.
So as everyone know i got married last year and couldn't be happier. Recently, one of my wife's friend, call her A. A was our mutual family friend of ours before we got married. A recently finished her residency and work at same hospital as i do here. A is single girl and before i married my wife, me and A talked for a bit for marriage purpose. But didn't end up working out. So my wife feels for strange reason that she is liking me. And i had no clue until my wife told me yesterday. When i asked her why would she even think like that. Instead of giving me reason she got angry and asking me that why would I be interested to know. So here i am clueless what have i done wrong?.
Our married life is great but sometimes i feel she just gets angry for no reason. Its not like i talk to girl A outside work. Except we are at work and grab coffee together. Which my wife knows. I mean if my wife is feeling bit jealous i am willing to do anything but i want her to talk about it. Instead of keeping it in.
she is possessive about you. women are just like that. you cant expect her to define certain things whih are not even in.her own hands. Im sure she trusts you, she just may not trust A lol. I think.you should manage your dealing with A to the minimum since there has been something happened between both of you even if it didnt work. save your relationship with your wife coz thats more imp than grabbing a cuppa coffee withA.
Does A still have feelings for you? If you think she does (and it sounds like you think that she may), I think the best thing would be to distance yourself a bit. If you carry on as if you two don't have history together that may just give her false hope (despite the fact that you're married), which could end up rather badly and make your professional relationship awkward. Having a cup of coffee every now and then should be fine, but I don't think you should carry on treating her like any other friend.
Our married life is great but sometimes i feel she just gets angry for no reason.
my frand, every man says this about his womans. don't sweat it. just find yourself something to do when these episodes happen. trust me you can't make things better by explaining things logically etc. not under situations of jealousy. lying helps. tell her she's beautiful. her nose looks like a mango flower. whatever it takes.
Maybe your wife feels insecure? Maybe she has felt this way forever but is just voicing her opinion on this issue.Maybe "A" does really like you,and your wife is just concerned.Although I solely believe in having trust in your partner,and I think she needs to TRUST you.She needs to open her mind to trusting you with such things.If you are not doing anything wrong just let her be,and let her come and talk to you,One thing II would suggest is dropping the "getting coffee" part. How would you react if your wife spent time with another guy...getting coffee or lunch?
You have to make a choice - is the friendship with "A" so important that your wife's feelings (be it unfounded jealously or her being right about "A" have feelings for you) don't matter? Or is the friendship so superficial that walking away from it wouldn't matter?
I have a non-desi friend whose husband started to chat with an office colleague and while she's not the jealous sort, she didn't like his having lunch with her or spending time with her one-on-one. For the sake of their relationship, he stopped meeting the work colleague.
It's about the happiness of your partner and the choices you make that show how you value and ensure their happiness.
she is scared to death by the thought that all illicit relationships starts in an innocent way then progresses into a full blown affair...she doesn't want to see herself a loser. she is right in her own world to conclude that and you should understand where she comes from.
Just give up on the coffee with her, no big deal! Since you described your relationship with your wife as good, i see no reason for you to risk it and that too for a acquaintance.
I usually dislike women for being so unrealistic and putting on weird demands but somehow in your case i feel its for your own better. If your wife starts having same issue with just about any colleague or friend of yours, then surely that would be a problem but let go on this one.
Limit your coffee thingy! A can have coffee with someone else! Try asking your wife to join you for lunch or coffee few times a week! Maybe spending time with you during work hours which she was assuming you spent with A will help her trust you again! Hope it gets better :)
If you know that your wife is clearly uncomfortable about A then her feelings should come first. Spend more time with your wife, make her feel comfortable and secure and stop having coffee with this other woman.
Limit your coffee thingy! A can have coffee with someone else! Try asking your wife to join you for lunch or coffee few times a week! Maybe spending time with you during work hours which she was assuming you spent with A will help her trust you again! Hope it gets better :)
So how r we sure that Mr. Hassan is not a player..many men do it to feed their ego and act all innocent, a guy asking a gal to have coffee with him will always be classified as hitting on her...If we have coffee, lunch or dinner with female coworkers it is mostly in group environment...Man up buddy...respect the girl that sacrificed everything 4 u...how would u feel about finding her in a cappuccino bar with a strapping young lad who had a thing 4 her...would you be satisfied with ohhh!! its not like he is a stranger.....we used to go to school together,,,,Good man rule book rule, not only will I not do anything inappropriate, I wil not even appear to be doing anything inappropriate
^ Very good point! Hubby and I have a very clear rule- there is no reason for either of us to be having coffee/lunch/dinner or ANYTHING (even phone conversations) with members of the opposite gender alone (unless it's our respective siblings or parents). He doesn't have female friends following marriage and I don't have male friends. We have work colleagues but that is strictly work and no lunch time socialising etc. While this may seem extreme to some people, the end result is that we are both extremely happy and comfortable. There is no need for "friends" of the opposite gender when we have each other and otherwise there is too much of a potential to cause hurt and misunderstanding.