Aray bacho…in an ideal world everyone would be careful for their duties n it will automatically prevent the voilation of anyone’s rights.
Since this world isn’t an ideal one…just do your part n forget about the rest.
Do good regardless of if the favour is returned or not. Agood deed is never wasted n will be rewarded, InshaAllah.
Its simply like its compulsory to say our prayers…but we will be questioned only for OUR prayers…Now we can’t go on saying why should i pray when my MIL/DIL is not …???
just like that we are responsible only for our deeds …leave the MIL/DIL alone n just worry about your part. easy peasy…isn’t it.
what a mess. we desies complicate the hell out of simple things. no wonder our nation is not going anywhere. married men are busy solving problems b/w their wives and mothers while unmarried guys spend their time chasing gals.
mahru, you are right. i do not understand your situation. but, speaking ill of someones mother is not cool either. no matter how bad you have it. if somethings are best left unsaid... then this would be one.
mahru, you are right. i do not understand your situation. but, speaking ill of someones mother is not cool either. no matter how bad you have it. if somethings are best left unsaid... then this would be one.
i agree...husband wouldnt appreciate that at all either.
rat poison.......lots of it...........................no more inlaws..............live happily ever after...........................................just joking!...........................................
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hire a hitman, they do a professional job.
I think that bringing religion in this issue is useless because most of the desis have their own modified version of religion, whatever goes in their favor is good, rest... who cares?
I agree with Mahru on "maa ke paoon ke neechay jannat" walla part. It happens all the time, and yes I have seen most mothers taking control of the situation by blackmailing their sons by this. When they say this their sons arent able to say anything more. They have to keep their voices low and their thoughts to themselves.
I am of the opinion that there shouldnt be a dispute between bahu and saas that could lead to seperation/fight between the mother and son. We're mothers as well, and tomorrow we're going to be saas too. what goes around comes around. and I believe that **Taali aik haath se nahin bajti. **No situation is like that saas is the evil witch who controls his son and daughter in law danday ke zor pe. If there are troubles in a house, both sas and bahu are responsible for that.
When I speak of my case, yes I have problems with my in-laws. But I also know that I couldnt come upto their expectations. My saas would have been a lot happier if I was a very talktative, funny, social person, which I am not.
And yes, sometimes I show my attitude as well, when I dont like something, which makes her mad at me. Although, I always try to keep her happy by giving expensive gifts to my in-laws, I have never received anything in return but I just buy things to make her happy.
no im not...but very observant. I have 2 sisters that are married and lots of married friends. :) I just use a bit of common sense as well when it comes to such matters.
I am of the opinion that there shouldnt be a dispute between bahu and saas that could lead to seperation/fight between the mother and son. We're mothers as well, and tomorrow we're going to be saas too. what goes around comes around. and I believe that Taali aik haath se nahin bajti. **No situation is like that saas is the evil witch who controls his son and daughter in law danday ke zor pe. If there are troubles in a house, both sas and bahu are responsible for that.
When I speak of my case, yes I have problems with my in-laws. But I also know that I couldnt come upto their expectations. My saas would have been a lot happier if I was a very talktative, funny, social person, which I am not.**
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I agree with you partially, its not always just one person causing so much trouble..
but cmon, you can't say problems are YOUR fault as well because you're not talkative funny and social!! I'm sorry but tahs very mean.. its ur personality, n disposition, its who u r.. what right does she have to "mold" you into what she wants in a bahu (personality-wise)?
Sara- yeah people expect you to change, inside and outside. Once I remember during the first year of marriage, my saas was not talking to me for some reason, maybe she wanted me to come to her first and ask her what's troubling her. But I knew that I didnt do anything that could hurt her feelings, nor did I have any idea that she was angry with me for somehting I dont even know. Anyway, one day during a conversation she mentioned this to my hubby. He told her that Sadaf is shy herself, and sometimes I have to ask her and start a conversation myself. And she replied "yeh to koi tareeqa nahin, shaadi ke baad insaan ko badalna parta hai. Agar woh khamosh rehti hai to us ko chahieye ke apnay aap ko badlay warna is tarha to guzara nahin ho ga".
I’ve heard lots of crap, but changing ur personality.. wow..
Ammi kept sayin the same thing to me in pakistan, i hated tht everyone knew every single detail, that I bought this for my friend (n later on probably said "oh seh ditn buy anything for us), that i joined a gym, and jus anything..tht this is no way to live , what am i gonna do when i get married blahblah.. im used to doing things on my own here, my independence, n no way will I let anyone change me, who i am etc.. i hav enough problems wit “friends” and stupid relatives telin me the same crap over n over, n as long as i’m not being very rude, no way am I gonna let strangers tell me to change myself
you should stick to what you believe in…however you cant make an old person change their ways. There is a saying for that which i cant remember at this time. It’s a bit easier for us younger people to bend a lil. You know what i mean?
well who should a real man be biased towards: parents who’ve raised him for 20+ years or some londi who he just got to know…well unless the man is a total joru ko ghulam i think i know what the answer is. Is that fair? probably not but as i said thats the way it is. Learn to live with it.
I’ve heard lots of crap, but changing ur personality.. wow..