There has never been a point in my life that I would get fed up with people coming over unannounced. I do believe it’s more polite, and according do islamic manners, that one calls or one lets the other know that they are coming over. But, like they say ‘Mehmaan Allah ki rehmat hotay hain.’
Last night this aunty came over unannounced, like she’s been doing ever since she came here, when I was doing some important work. My mother called me downstairs and told me to help aunty out with her letters. So I came down, said salaam, asked her how she was doing and how her kids were doing. Then she handed me the letters and asked me to see what’s in them.
So I sat down and started reading them and at the same time explained her why she got the letters. There was a drama playing on the tv, so she was watching that while I was explaining to her. Not even once, did I get the impression that she was listening, because she was watching the frikkin drama and was talkin to my mother at the same time. So then I just gave her the letters back, she took them and continued watching. Then I went up to my room to finish my work.
During that, my father called home… ‘Kiska phone aaya hai.. kia keh rahay hain?’ I was thinking to myself, that’s none of your business. So almost every single time when she gets up to leave, she grabs the phone, out of herself without asking permission or whatsoever, ‘mein zara so and so ko phone karloon’. And she starts maaring guppaan with someone.
Is it just me, or is this just very rude??? Because we are totally not close to her. And how should you let a person like that know that she’s being rude? We just don’t say anything, because Allah ka darr hai. Maybe He’s testing us or whatever..?
Your views on this, has it happened to you, and what did you do?
We're having the same problem right now with a family member of ours. Yes, they are family and all but we have our own lives and unannounced visits are not appreciated. They - aunti and uncle - will just drop by with some pie or cake, make themselves at home and ask a MILLION questions about what is going on our home.
Last week, I was SO sick I didnt leave the house for over three days. One day, my niece was home alone with me and I was lying down after putting her down for a nap. I was wheezing, my head was throbbing and the doorbell rings! Im thinking its my mom coming home with my medicine but no - it was my uncle and aunti. They see Im sick and they still stick around...watching me as I make chai for them and take out some biscuits and snacks for them to eat. My mother isnt home and I look like death warmed up...can you leave now? They stayed while their little daughter proceeded to tear apart my living room bit by bit.
My mom is getting fed up with this too; it happens ALL the time now. We just dont know what to do anymore and the bigger issue is that they are khandan vale. They say it all the time "Family hone ka faida kya agar ek doosre ke ghar aja nahin sakte?". We always call when we go over to their place and make plans with them so they have sufficient notice.
Im really interested in what ideas people come up with because its getting out of hand now.
i think trouble is harder to deal with back home. for people that give you a head ache or eye twitch are usually relatives in a round about way. although the manner in which they barge in will have you thinking they are blood relatives. i had a woman who gave me severe trouble.she would come more than twice some times in one day, have one of those annoying kids that tend to linger long after parents have disappeared, would poke her nose in everything, and she would sit and sit even when she figured out i had plans , i tried pretending sleeping or someother thing but she would keep on banging the door. just wouldnt get that signal to leave. i have still no idea how to deal with her short of changing continents.
I was thinking to myself, that’s none of your business. So almost every single time when she gets up to leave, she grabs the phone, out of herself without asking permission or whatsoever, ‘mein zara so and so ko phone karloon’. And she starts maaring guppaan with someone.
And how should you let a person like that know that she’s being rude? We just don’t say anything, because Allah ka darr hai. Maybe He’s testing us or whatever..?
C’mon we all knw what most asian uncles & Aunties r lyk 
Lol!