k heres the latest problem.. i am IA getting married and moving to canada in next two months.. me and my fiance are gona be living on our own starting from scratch. now the other day this Phuppo of mine calls me.. From UK and in the midst of asking me all these intruding questions like " kitne kapre banwao gi" and " hall kitne ka mila" she says.. “Oh haan. is dafa hum soch rehe hai shadi ke baad canada chalen ge..is tarah Tumhare pas bhi chakker lagaie ge”… and i was like 
.. i did kinda refuse by saying " chalain dekhte hain" but my dad says i should call her over…
now not to forget she is the phuppo who went to my mothers Honey moon with them.. and to day she has a problem with every thing that gets done our way… i wouldnt be this scared if this was some one else.. but shes the kind who goes home to home describing (in her own words) how every thing was rong.. i really dont kno what to do.. shes a nice person but we cant really have her over with in days we move to an empty apt. we wouldnt even have furniture by then.. WHAT TO DO?
Re: Guests Already??!!
Re: Guests Already??!!
Be clear to her in no uncertain terms.
“We would love for you to come phupho-jaani, but I’m afraid that I will be starting a new relationship and with all the stress of moving to a new country, setting up a home from scratch and making sure that my responsibilities towards my in-laws are fulfilled, I don’t think that I will have even a minute to spare. I’m sure you wouldn’t want your favourite niece to start off in her new life on the wrong foot! What would my in-laws say if they see my family showing up at my home immediately after the wedding? They will definitely brand us as impolite and insensitve, even though you and I know that we are just a very tight-knit family unit. Thank you sooooo much for understanding.”
deliver the above with a sickly sweet tone… 
Re: Guests Already??!!
^ good call on mentioning the in-laws… sounds like that would be the perfect deterrent for your phoppo!
oh, and don’t mention the empty apartment/no furniture thing - i tried that with my mamoo and to this day, i get the, “dil mein jaga honi chahiyeh, hum toh floor par bhi so jaatey” lecture 
also, talk to your parents again and see if they can possibly intervene on your behalf… you know, like, abhi toh woh bauhat busy hai poora ghar set up karnay mein. IA jab ho jai ga toh phir us ka irada hai kay sab ko bulai. its the perfect putting-off tactic. plus coming from her own brother, sis in law it’ll sound different and probably more acceptable. it sounds like if you personally object, she’ll tell the whole fam how unpleasant you are for not hosting her.
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Yes I think you should get your parents to intervene.
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Thanks gals.. for all ur help. c the thing is .. k it would surely b nice to get the parents to talk to them.. but my dad is already in the " koi farak nahi parta.. wo to bas milne arahai hain" mode.. and my mom .. being the bhabhi.. i dont kno how the other party will take it.. if u kno what i mean:S.... waisai i have come up with another idea.. i am going some where :)... during that one week.( or at least thats what she finds out). and when they go back i call them and be like :O Aap aye nahi.. hum to itna wait kar rehe thai..
HUMPH.. :S.. i feel so bad .. par KIA karon.. ppl dont take hints ne more.. and abt the telling them politely part.. she'll tell me More politely ke " are baita koi bat nahi susral walo ko hum khod fone kar ke poch lein ge".. Trust me .. that can Totally happen:S:S
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wow. I think what muzna said sounded good. Really stress that it would look bad in the eyes of your husband and in-laws if immediately after getting married ur phupu (not even ur parents, these are ur relatives, not ur immediate family) came to stay.
Explain that the apartment will be empty, you won't have a proper bed and other furniture, and everyone will be uncomfortable.
Your parents really should be telling her not too. She's imposing and your dad should speak up. But I guess not, huh? It's just ridiculous what relatives think they can get away with. That's why relatives are great to have, as long as you don't have to actually see them and interact with them.
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you see it goes both ways... in one way its suppose to be Your Dad who should be telling your Phopoo not to visit you immediately since you are newly wed and starting from scartch and initially it would be hard for you to even to budget yourself for the grocery and the bills (let alone the furniture and other stuff for now). but on the other hand, your dad may be just worried about your new life (...aur woh bhi 'saat samandar paar') and he thinks your Phopoo maybe the only one who would let him know how good or bad (god forbid) you are doing in canada.
we dont know ..you know your phopoo and your dad very well so you got to decide what to do.
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She can't ask her parents to intervene.....heck, they couldn't keep the same phupho out of their own honeymoon!!!
Be blunt but speak the truth.
If you start making excuses like "We are not going to be here. We're going away for a week", she's bound to eventually find out.
Being branded a liar is worse than being branded blunt.
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^ agree on her statement..........
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well we can ACTUALLY go some where:d.. lol.. how abt that:D or be BUSY.. NE thing can be happening thats not lieying..
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and its a perfect excuse for a vacation! :D
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OMG i feel so sorry for you..it really sucks to have such imposing relatives...but believe me be lucky that shes your phupho only and nt your saas or other member of husband's family...i'm sure your mother must have gone through alot worse thanks to her (cmon, coming on ur honeymooN!! WTF!)
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Is she planning to stay with you? Or just come over for tea or dinner?
Maybe you could take her out somewhere?
She's gonna talk trash regardless, so placate her a bit, but don't go to too much trouble.
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oh u dont kno her.. if i meet her SOme how she will end up at my place... Nah i aint willing to take ne chances:(
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How is this phupho of yours nice when she tagged along
with your parents on their honey moon??????
I am sorry but she is defenitely not a nice person to begin with.
And for your problem try some of the above tactics.
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give her the guilt trip :D
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I dont understand why phupos can't bear our happiness :(
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so true.
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Hey.. I’m a phupho too 
granted my lil nephew is only 3 but i’m gonna be a nice phupho when he grows up…
It however true thought that phupho’s are always considered really mean and khala’s are nice.. wonder why that is…??