Re: Guests Already??!!
Exactly,
I'm a phupo as well, and I love my 3 nieces and 2 nephews to death.
My oldest niece is 13 mashallah and I would keep her if I could!
Why is the same with Dada/Dadis as opposed to Nana/Nanis.
Again my parents ADORE these kids.
Re: Guests Already??!!
You have to be straight to your phupho in some way, and obviously she is your father's sister he won't find anything wrong in her. But on the surface such people seem very nice but she just wants to come see you so she can spread every tiny detail of your life and of course interfere in your life. Now, this is your life, and your in laws, she should mind her own life. You will have to deal with a lot of psychos in life and you shouldn't accept defeat so easily, but you have to learn to keep those snakes dressed as angels, on arms length or your life will be horrible. At times in life you have to be bold accoding to the situation and at times diplomatic. Now, when it comes to your phupho try the diplomatic way or if it doesn't work then you have to be bold and straight and frankly speaking you have nothing to lose if you are bold, she will just tell everyone how cold you are but that's it and it's better than having her over and she inspecting your entire life.
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I HATE MY PHUPHOO
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You phuphoo must be trouble maker or a noisy person who wnats to know everythign about others. Is she married?
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Oh yeah shes married.. shes the eldest phuppo so she has become the second DAADI by default… i already have my daadi and i love her to death.. dont need another one thank u.. and u kno what the real thing is. I have other phuppos too and i mite not have such a Huge problem with them.. infact i am Very laadly of those other two phuppos.. but this one is always SO diplomatic when it comes to her own household.. the answer to every thing is.. BAS dekhain.. and always trying to show us down. just coz they have been outa pak more than we have ( wonder how thats good) but oh well.. so yea.. i am a very straight forward person and i wont be able to be all smiley and bubbly spending three days with some one i really dont feel comfortable around.. and specially when she keeps saying things like.. acha ghar may YAY bhi nahi hai.. aur WO bhi nahi hai.. !!!
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I think ours' is the only family I know of where the phupho is the BEST!!!
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i think phuphos are considered bad because they are the sis in laws of your mother, and as there is always tension between sis in laws, and you always here the bad things about your phupho from your mom.. whereas the khala is ur moms sister so she will obviously be in the goodbooks.. its the same with dada/dadi.. they are ur moms parents in-law and she will have had some bad experiences with them.. kids are often quite influenced by what their moms tell them and how they see their moms react to people.. so its natural to be closer to the khala's mamu's and nana/nani's than to the phuphos and chachas and dada/dadi's..
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Well I wasnt raised in a jont family but yeah I am closer to my naankay than my dadkay mostly because of wat ^ Ambar^ stated....
Re: Guests Already??!!
i think phuphos are considered bad because they are the sis in laws of your mother, and as there is always tension between sis in laws, and you always here the bad things about your phupho from your mom.. whereas the khala is ur moms sister so she will obviously be in the goodbooks.. its the same with dada/dadi.. they are ur moms parents in-law and she will have had some bad experiences with them.. kids are often quite influenced by what their moms tell them and how they see their moms react to people.. so its natural to be closer to the khala's mamu's and nana/nani's than to the phuphos and chachas and dada/dadi's..
i totally agree with u amber.. and i had realised this a LONG time ago... and as i am sure i pointed out earlier i love the other two phuppos.. i have made sure that i dont like/dislike ne one coz my dad or my mom have had good/bad experiences with them.. i am talking with my own experience here.. its not that i hate her over all or ne thing.. or am not close to her. its just that i dont like her intervening in my life so early in the day
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tell them u r not home around that time.. seriosuly
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I think ours' is the only family I know of where the phupho is the BEST!!!
Same here. She is fantastic. I got married and moved to Pak and my mum lives here. So my phupee is like a second mom to me in Pakistan. She is jsut very loving and caring. And she is on very good terms with my mum as well so i guess i am lucky Alhumdolilah.
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hahaha i totally agree 100%
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hehe.. i havent heard from her again.. so lets c. hope shes not Naraz or sumn
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i totally agree with u amber.. and i had realised this a LONG time ago... and as i am sure i pointed out earlier i love the other two phuppos.. i have made sure that i dont like/dislike ne one coz my dad or my mom have had good/bad experiences with them.. i am talking with my own experience here.. its not that i hate her over all or ne thing.. or am not close to her. its just that i dont like her intervening in my life so early in the day
I guess either she or you did not click with each other, something must have happened with you guys nobody knows, there is somthing where you & her ended on the wrong side of life.
As for being dad's sis they always wanted the be the controler of the family even though if there is dadi in the house, most phoopo wants to show nobody can be superior then her especially to her brother's wife, other-wise they call thier brothers "bewi ka ghulam". they too want to control their brothers.
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Hey every one.. i was just going over my previous posts and came across this one.. and actually felt ashamed at even riting all this.. i have been married Alhamdulilah for abt two months and have been in canada for that long too.. in the beginning it was hard to think of guests soo early.. but my family ( phuppos, mamoo, daadi, khala.. ).. they All started coming All the way over from states not even two weeks after i was there.. i really didnt even have ne furniture then and i was freaking out.. but i didnt realize how much fun it would be.... they all brought me wonderful presents.. i got microwaves and dinner sets:D.. and we all had fun sitting on the carpet and playing cards.. :D and having tea and papar.. :D and dahi bhalle and what not.. Families are great.. :D.. i just thought i would rite all this for the ppl i had scared off.. :D Thanks for al ur support. :D God Bless!
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^ aww well its great that it turned out nice :)
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Alhumdulillah I love my Phupho and she's been pretty good with my mom, no real complaints. There will always be small things. My mom just had a meddling mother in law, my daadi. But what is strange is she never really bad mouthed her to us. It was as we grew up and saw ourselves how manipulative she can be, that we never really got close to her. Khair.
I agree, you should just be blunt and straightforward and let her know that you are not ready for guests yet as you are just starting out a new life and need time to adjust.
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I dont understand why phupos can't bear our happiness :(
LOL that is soooooo TRUE!!!!!
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good lukk..>:bummer: