got me thinking..

Lifestyle Relationships
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I watched a movie last night and it got me thinking:

“can you really forgive, if you can’t forget”

would you be able to forgive someone, if you can’t forget what they did?

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Re: got me thinking..

Yes, if you truly believe it will never happen again.

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Re: got me thinking..

i can do just one.either forget or forgive. i cant do both :( im a gurl! hey rimsh share some tips on how u can both watch a movie AND think at the same time please.

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Re: got me thinking..

I've been known to hold a grudge...

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Re: got me thinking..

Its possible! I will forgive what you said or did depending on the circumstances but it sure will take a long time to forget.

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Re: got me thinking..

You know what they say, Once bit twice shy.
I believe in second chances, but I can't forget easily, it takes time and re-building of trust. Until then it's there lurking somewhere in the back of my mind.

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Re: got me thinking..

Yup, i can and have done

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I found that, it's easy to forgive but really really hard to forget. It takes too long for me to forget something :(

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I think it's impossible to forget. But it is possible to forgive.

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^ that the thing maddy, and it takes it back to the same point that if you can't forget have you really forgiven?

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mee too teazy, its really hard to forget :frowning:

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which Movie was that??

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Re: got me thinking..

I remember asking an aunt that same question years ago, to skip a long winded description, her reply was (very simply put): Its stupid to forget.

Let me explain, I mean things happen for a reason, wrong, right, there's nothing you can do once its happened to change it. Forgiveness is good, but forgetfulness can just leave you open to experiencing the same thing again. You should learn from your experiences and take those lessons with you as move forward in life, it doesnt make you bitter, cynical or unforgiving unless thats what you're aiming for, it just makes you a little wiser and perhaps a little jaded but thats life.

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Re: got me thinking..

hehehe shweets its a skill you acquire with practice, i can do many things while watching movies :wink: hehehe i’ll pm you the tips if you promise not to tell.

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do you understand the ‘story’ of a movie? or do you just like the actions :slight_smile:

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I can forgive but I cant forget, thats just how it goes!

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I can never forget :bummer: and eventho i’ve forgiven, im still holding a silent grudge against someone and I dunno wat to do abt it coz she thinks i’m all happy and bz and la di freakin daa :frowning:

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Re: got me thinking..

^ Sara yehi to question hai…:smack: have you really forgiven, if u can’t forget? cuz if you really have forgiven shouldn’t you be able to just forget it?

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Re: got me thinking..

I don't ever forget something that someone did. I think that's part of human nature. You naturally learn from experience. Then you need to use that information to form a framework or set of beliefs. But to forgive is different. That ability depends on the individual. Some people never want to forgive. For me it's essential. I don't hold grudges. I never hold anything against anyone.

People usually do things for a reason. I like to analyze the reason why and rationalize a situation. I want to make peace with things within myself. With all the things a person can experience in life we would end up bitter, old people if we didn't forgive.

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Re: got me thinking..

its possible, and quite an everyday thing now.. i’ve been doing forgiven and forgotten routine for pretty much, everything thats coming my way since last couple’a months rimsh…

cuz ..:bummer: if i DONT do both, then i am afraid i will be back in that mode where it took a lot of people’s efforts to put me back on my feet…

u see there is this trigger in mind, u turn that on and it takes care of that pain thats causing the ‘cant forget, cant forgive’ factor..

so once that pain is taken off, switch gets back to normal… then u hardly think/feel about it, and yeah, u end up forgetting/forgiving the incident/person..

:frowning: but u have to work REALLY really hard on it… and things like alcohol, drugs, and combinations are really distracting to it… :slight_smile: