ok.. ive been gettign lectured by family members that i need to stop wasting money on holidays and fazool cheezein :halo: and start saving for gold sets and diamond rings, so that by the time i get married.. i have something to be proud of..
im soo not a jewellerry person, and lastnight i sorta chucked a 10 second tantrum that i wasnt gonna wear anything hidiously large on the day..
neways thats besides the point.. what everyone was telling me was that i should save (or buy) two big gold sets (i got no idea what im gonna do with them) and then make about 5-6 lil gold sets.. and a diamond one (like i dont have better things to spend my money on)
curious, married female guppies.. did you organise all ur jewellerry way before u were married? in my case.. when theres no sign of a marriage in the first place.. no sign of a dhulla actually… if i have to start saving for jewellerry, how do u think i should go about doing it? should i get big sets.. or lil ones? or like not worry at all and plan another holiday?
ok this time i totally have to agree with ur family
u definetly need all those things n definetly need to save up, baba mujhe abhi se lectures mill rahe hain
n.e. ways it’s alwayz good cuz den when time comes who knows u run short of money n have a huge problem, and these kind of things r a must
forget bout ur sasural waalay, doosre log kya sochain ge, hawww the typical desi response
and im not really sure on how to go bout shopping for it since im a careless person myself when it comes to these things…but i guess have sum things in mind on to how much u wana spend so start saving n look at bunch of sets and see what u like best, either start from small ones and then think bout the big ones or get the big ones first so they’re out of ur way and then look at the small ones
wuteva suites u, and good luck InshAllah when the time comes there will b a dulha and a shadi…n by that time u’ll have everything ready
depends on each family's financial position really. Allhumdullillah, we never had to face such situation and my mom had already made lots of sets for me in advance and i was never asked to save up what ever i earned for any of these things. however, i know of some girls who did actually save their earnings in order to buy gold sets and stuff cuz they knew their parents won't be able to buy them.
p.s: i am really fizool kharch. my money is usually spent on shopping, eating out or loads of mithais :D
thanks chorni babe... yeah my cousin reckons that i should put aside like $2k and buy my gold sets.. but i cant afford going back to pak every year.. so i thought id send her the money and she can do watever she wants with it (i mean.. buy whatever jewellerry she likes for me)
yeah and everyone gave me the same answer, its about what everyone else will say on the day "haawww hai.. maa ne set bhi bana kar nahin diya.." and wagera wagera... i mean i dont even care bout stuff like that.. but i guess it'll make mum happy.. somewhat
suroor, Mashallah ur very lucky :) im a bit used to spending my own money and gettign my own stuff.. so i think i'd find it a bit uncomfortable having my parents spend so much money on me... they can give me one if they want.. but thats all
ai hai.. i guess i really do have to think about this investment then huh... sigh
p.s hahah suroor.. man i love mittai too.. but thank goodness i havent had any for month... all my money goes to presents
lol mehnaz bibi saying is ez, but doing…well being a desi not so much
sadzzz oh that’s good then, yea the paki jewelry is awesome, the ones here are nothing compared to back home…even the fake ones look real :love: it wuz very nice
n.e. ways good luck with all that, but yea even if we don’t care, knowing our culture ppl don’t stop talkin n it’s our rentz who have to face em..
Sadzzz I think you have a right to go out and see the world.I mean who cares about gold sets.Im constantly being told the same, that I need this many pairs of clothes, this and that for my shaadi.My Ammi already has some sets made for me, but I have yet to buy anything for myself.Im not a big spender, so I did save a bit up,maybe it can pay off the reception hal bills:D .But otherwise I did take a three week vacation, and I spent a lot on clothes and shoes- mostly because my aunty was with me (she loves to shop) but I dont regret it anyhow.And I plan to wear all those way before my shaadi.My advice would be spend some money and see the world now ,then save up for the future.
MQ, thats my plan hehe.. im going away in a week!!!! im hmm not excited just yet.. but looking forward to it. Ive got a few things to organise when i get back too.. so lets see what happens..
yeah mum has a few things made for me too.. well umm she wears all of it but it doesnt bother me... cus im not gonna be wearing them anytime soon
Chorni, yeah the stuff back in pak is beautufl.. and it works out to be a lot cheaper than here as well.. which is the plus side to all this, hence i wouldnt mind buying a few sets.. i think im really gonna have to work hard to convince myself now.. i dont want my parents to be in any sorta pressure when the time comes...
forget about the sets and stuff and stop immitating Batuta.... buy gold bricks ... cash them when u need $$$ and use them as a weapon when needed... :D
if u have enuff money to buy a bunch of heavy gold sets, and u r not marrying anyhere in the near future, just rem there are other things which have a much higher return than gold. try stocks or plot-buying. u might be able to buy double the sets, when the time comes.
waisay this is all about having the saving disposition, if u'd rather spend it on other things u presently need, then its no use. its all in the disposition. either u r the savings type or u aren't. no easy way to change ppl around in this matter. and its got nothing to do with shaadi or no shaadi, and desi-pana, i think they are just giving u a disguised lecture on making some savings along the way as u earn.
Well, I know that I just saved one gold coin, as I work in a bank, I bought it somewhat cheaper than the normal customers. At the time of my shadi, I got the shock, that everything was expensiver then I thought, that one gold coin didnt even get me a small set. Also gold gets expensive with time and its best to do some advance planning as even if you dont want, if you are marring in a desi culture, these thing will matter, if not with you, then the others, as they will check what u gold u are wearing, after marriage u can do whatever u want with it, sell it and buy something else.
I guess gold is what made our mums happy, so they assume that is what will make us happy. My mum never really got to travel, work etc so her whole life revolved around getting married. She told me the only reason she got married to my dad was because my dad’s uncle owned a jewellery shop It was the first time in her life that she actually owned something valuable, and so she thinks her daughters must be feeling the same.
I’m sure you’ll do the same with your daughters sadz … you’ll encourage them to go travel the world while they’re young, but they’ll be far more interested in spending their money on more modern fazool harchis
Personally, I’m gonna have one diamond wedding ring and that’s it. And no, my parents don’t know that yet
I agree with Mehnaz. Worry about those things when there is a dulha on the horizon. Having nice jewelry for your wedding, but why does a girl need 10 sets? My sisters both got married in a real rush (first one had 3 months notice and second one had a 3 day notice) and Alhamdullilah, they had nice weddings and all the appropriate jewelry. But thats an extreme example.
I have cousins who are not only getting jewlery made, but outfits, matching shoes etc for their weddings and there is no dulha in sight. To me, that is utterly stewpid. But I guess other people see things differently.
My parents have never raised such a topic with me. Im just assuming when the time comes, we'll all go on a massive shopping spree.
Once there is some "baat pakki" I can understand that you start getting things sorted out for your wedding. But there is no use in getting the jewellery years before the actual thing is about to take place.
if i have to start saving for jewellerry, how do u think i should go about doing it? should i get big sets.. or lil ones? or like not worry at all and plan another holiday?
the typical desi response
InshAllah when the time comes there will b a dulha and a shadi…n by that time u’ll have everything ready 
sounds like a dangerous investment
It was the first time in her life that she actually owned something valuable, and so she thinks her daughters must be feeling the same.