well giving milk to the groom is kind of "sunnah"....
but it in the tradition giving milk to the groom aur phir uss se pehse mange bohat bhuuri rasm ho gey hai.
duniya bohat lalelij karti hai.
i think thori se "shararte" karna is really ok...but getting money for such things is more then haram.
u know our prophet says that nobody should raise his hand to demand somebody for money. u should just demand and ask Allah !
i have seen a lot of arabian weddings...and the groom and the bride "muu mitha karte hai kajoor aur dhuud ke saath"
issliye hamere rasul-e-pak bhi bohat pasand karte the...
i have seen a lot of wedding...where the little sis of the bride asked the groom such a fazool rakm...kohi karoorpathi to nehi hote saree...
aur phir fazool bateein...uth patangh masak .... thats not islamic and anymore of human... dulhan ka bhi kya kasoor...jab uss waqt se rishta ehse start hora hai...
thora sa mazaak karlo, hass lo....thats ok :)
just find the middle way !