Re: girls-would you let your husband marry again or divorce him?
I'd leave him.
Re: girls-would you let your husband marry again or divorce him?
yeah why not? islam main chaar biwis ki ijazat hi.
Re: girls-would you let your husband marry again or divorce him?
^ true, but I don't want to be one of them
Re: girls-would you let your husband marry again or divorce him?
yeah why not? islam main chaar biwis ki ijazat hi.
If you read post 20, it should respectively give you a womans perspective.
Whether you respect that or not is your choice but imagine being a second man in your wives life. The logic is pretty much the same but in Islam this polygamy is more of a patriarchal issue which I guess men use as an arm.
Re: girls-would you let your husband marry again or divorce him?
I'd divorce him and leave him to marry whoever he wants.. the thought of him staying with me out of pity or some twisted sense of 'loyalty' only because I've had to talk him out of marrying a second wife makes me feel a bit sick.. the guy would prob be fantasising about it quite a bit if he had brought it up himself in the first place imo and not much worse than him thinking of another woman when he's in bed with me.. My SIL has an uncle who has two wives. He did actually want wife no.2 all along but was forced into marring wife no.1 from 'back home' (cousin I think). He originally asked wife no.1 for a straight out divorce but she apparently said she couldn't handle the stigma of it and having to leave the UK lol so gave him the go-ahead to marry the other woman (nikah only).. Being honest neally every story I've heard of involving polygyny is messy and nasty.. kids end up hating their dads and feeling bitter at him for not being around when they needed him and then the resentment the mum feels at being replaced by a younger model.. There is the odd happy ending here and there but it does seem to be a very small percentage.. Sorry, can't seem to split into paragraphs :(
Coming from a family where my w***ker of a biological father married two women I agree with Deebas thoughts and feelings.
Getting married 4 times is a right in Islam, but which other bit of Islam do such men practice? Do they perform salah 5 times a day? Read the quran daily? Lower their gaze when they see women? Give generously to charity? Give an orphan a supporting hand? Well in my fathers situation he didn't do anything and the income support system of England raised his kids-because he had so many he didn't earn enough to maintain them.
Given the fact of my childhood, if my husband was to bring up second marriage I would ask him to leave the property, change the locks, file for divorce and gradually move on.
He may have the right to 4 wives, but I also have the right to have a happy balanced marriage where there is two people raher than 3, 4,5,6 in the equation.
Re: girls-would you let your husband marry again or divorce him?
Its true though, men only think with their "brain" but they dont understand or even hold back for a second and consider what impact this may have on the children.
How interesting,
Re: girls-would you let your husband marry again or divorce him?
If you read post 20, it should respectively give you a womans perspective. Whether you respect that or not is your choice but imagine being a second man in your wives life. The logic is pretty much the same but in Islam this polygamy is more of a patriarchal issue which I guess men use as an arm.
i don't agree that having a 2nd man in a woman's life is the same but i agree with most of your points.
Re: girls-would you let your husband marry again or divorce him?
i don't agree that having a 2nd man in a woman's life is the same but i agree with most of your points.
Why not tho?
I'm interested to know why it cannot be the same?
Atleast you understood why its such a problem for women now.
Re: girls-would you let your husband marry again or divorce him?
Why not tho? I'm interested to know why it cannot be the same?
Atleast you understood why its such a problem for women now.
first of all it's the practice of Jahliya and not allowed in islam to have two or more husbands.
you get pregnant and you can't tell who the father is, even the DNA is not 100% accurate. If you can't determine our child's father, you will have problems with naming the cild, inheritance etc.
and so many other reasons....
Re: girls-would you let your husband marry again or divorce him?
first of all it's the practice of Jahliya and not allowed in islam to have two or more husbands.
you get pregnant and you can't tell who the father is, even the DNA is not 100% accurate. If you can't determine our child's father, you will have problems with naming the cild, inheritance etc.
and so many other reasons....
I think we are all aware that Islamically it is forbidden but that is irrelevant in this discussion.
The points made and the reasoning behind women being so against the idea of sharing a partner is more emotional and mental and this is what I was trying to explain to you.
Are you emotionally and mentally able to share your wife with another man?
You are actually missing the point and going way off track to justify that its okay for men to indulge in multiple marriages.
Re: girls-would you let your husband marry again or divorce him?
I think we are all aware that Islamically it is forbidden but that is irrelevant in this discussion.
The points made and the reasoning behind women being so against the idea of sharing a partner is more emotional and mental and this is what I was trying to explain to you. Are you emotionally and mentally able to share your wife with another man?
You are actually missing the point and going way off track to justify that its okay for men to indulge in multiple marriages.
i don't know, i'm not a man.
Re: girls-would you let your husband marry again or divorce him?
i don't know, i'm not a man.
LOL!!!!!! Sorry.
Re: girls-would you let your husband marry again or divorce him?
LOL!!!!!! Sorry.
lol
Okay. I was looking at the broader picture. What if my husband decides to marry again? Would I ask for a divorce? No. I'd prefer to live with him regardless of his 2nd marriage provided that he equally treats us. The effects of a divorce on children are far worse than the effects of a husband's 2nd marriage on his first wife.
Re: girls-would you let your husband marry again or divorce him?
While here every woman says she'll leave, in reality most do not and if confronted with the situation many of you wont either.
Re: girls-would you let your husband marry again or divorce him?
i don't think I could.
Re: girls-would you let your husband marry again or divorce him?
While here every woman says she'll leave, in reality most do not and if confronted with the situation many of you wont either.
My impression is that most women in this thread have lived independent lives before marriage. So, they have the background to be financially and emotionally independent. I'm curious, why do you believe that most would not?
At least from the posting history, I can say that of the women who have replied in this thread.
Re: girls-would you let your husband marry again or divorce him?
Crikey,rv and dheebs views scare me.
Well...some men just do want more than on girl you know. What the big problem. Especially if hes rich and brings loads to the table, do you think hes gonna resist all that tempation out there.
Well...is this Polygamy really such a big emotional issue forr women that it is out of the question they live as sisters. Well...it not always about having the bigger family...its just about wanting another chick and her variety. For men a major part of going fora girl is her looks...of which after some time they get bored..
Just be straight up darn it..and say it if it is too painful even your man, with your knowledge, is wanting to just be physical with another women. If its that important, Some men out of love/ respect for thier wives would give up thier pleasures you know.. ** If we men are not educted, how do we know what to do.**
Dont bash me pls..just answer the question.
peace:
What's there to be educated about? Do you think you can handle your woman alternating? If you can't, then don't expect the same from women. It is THAT important.
Ps..I do agree with your other posts on the forum and I like reading them. But this one is just confusing.
Re: girls-would you let your husband marry again or divorce him?
While here every woman says she'll leave, in reality most do not and if confronted with the situation many of you wont either.
I'm sure most women born and bought up in the West would leave. The majority who don't and stick with it have been born and brought up in other cultures where either they don't have any other choice or it's difficult to remarry or for some other reason it would be more beneficial to stay in the marriage. I wouldn't hesitate to walk away if it happened to me. I can say that with 100% certainty. Might take a while to pick myself up and get over with but I wouldn't make do with a 'part-time' husband who obviously feels there is something lacking in our relationship when there is prob someone else out there who'll treat me with more respect and actually want to be there as much as possible for both myself and my kids. I couldn't stay in a relationship where my love isn't reciprocated either, got too much self-respect.
Re: girls-would you let your husband marry again or divorce him?
*I'll be feeding him and my new sister-wife ladoo. *
Re: girls-would you let your husband marry again or divorce him?
*I'll be feeding him and my new sister-wife ladoo. *
filled with poison?