Someone I know who knows my inlaws told them that “Pakistan kay halaat buhat kharab hain” etc etc…and girls have multiple boyfriends. It sounds like an exaggeration but recently I’ve heard so many such incidents that I have started to believe her.
And I see this behaviour is prevalent among the working class as oppose to very rich or very poor. Girls would usually make friends with boys to get money and gifts out of them. And sad part is…parents are okay with it.
What if you witness something similar in your own family…how would you react? Would you try to stop it? How?
I have noticed people outside Pakistan saying girls have become immoral. I have no idea where they are getting this impression from. Pakistani girls are as diverse as any other. You will find all sorts everywhere and you can't tar the whole nation with a few anecdata
^yeah well as I said I didn't pay any attention to such rumours until I started noticing such things among some of my own family members and their friends and their friends etc.
^ Girl friend and Boy friend culture is not new. I heard story of someone used to have a boy friend 40 or 50 years ago. Pakistan main bhi insaan hi rehty hian... Culture is not popular as western gf and bg, therefore some of us defend while other oppose, every family is different.
^but now it has become acceptable. And what about befriending boys to get money and gifts and phone credit? They have turned relationships into damn business.
Islam is not a prevalent factor in Pakistan. Never has been. And is even less now. Not to mention Bollywood has a massive influence on Pakistan, more so than ever before. Just sad really.
I've heard the same stuff from in laws family back home and friends of friends etc.
All my family are here in the UK. No one left in Pakistan for us. Grandparents have passed on (may Allah grant them Jannah) and no real reason to go back now.
Problems everywhere though. Britain's pretty messed up right now too.
@hareem01 Cell phone easy load credit is incentive of having boy friend. 15 years ago, PTV was only channel and dish network was not very common. Now almost all household in Pakistan are blessed with cable network. Media is doing their job by highlighting and promotion of Valentines day. Value system of our nation has changed. Chat communication and date date meet up were very common back in 2000s.
What do you mean by acceptable? Are fathers and brothers endorsing this culture?
Again, I'm talking about a very particular social class and age group among Pakistanis.
Acha na, naraz kyon horai ho.
As far as yr question in OP is concerned, I really dont know how would i react. But do i have to react? I mean if someone is mature then its their life. And if I really have to then i'll probably talk to them and sort out the reasons and actions.
NowI can start to expect comments like "may be only your family in Pak is like this etc".
Why do we become se defensive so quickly?
I also hate it when people get defensive here. She just asked a question, she isnt accusing anyone.
Anyhow, the culture is definitely changing here. Most of my cousins who got married recently had love marriages. When you go to the mall, you see a lot of under aged couples in the food court. Masis/drivers are on phone all the time, they are definitely not talking to their spouses!
But then, obviously not everyone is like that. I dont think most families know. Most of the couples are discreet about their activities.
Defo a huge change. Media, social networking, cheap telecom... it all kind of pushed it in that direction. Before it was isolated to pockets or u knew certain schools were "that" type.. but it's extremely common now. A friend and i were talking and she summed it up.. it's not our culture. When someone in the West dates etc.. it's not weird cos that's a part of their culture. Ghin aati hai ab, when visiting Pakistan.. love it for all the memories but defo a huge shift towards Westernisation... and not in a good way.
Defo a huge change. Media, social networking, cheap telecom... it all kind of pushed it in that direction. Before it was isolated to pockets or u knew certain schools were "that" type.. but it's extremely common now. A friend and i were talking and she summed it up.. it's not our culture. When someone in the West dates etc.. it's not weird cos that's a part of their culture. Ghin aati hai ab, when visiting Pakistan.. love it for all the memories but defo a huge shift towards Westernisation... and not in a good way.
Obviously media had a role to play, but I think this culture also has something to do with stress. Too many problems in Pakistan now. Terrorism, inflation, unemployment etc. People are stressed out. They need an outlet. Short term relationships are a relatively cheaper way to have fun!
And then in interior Sindh and Punjab some people dont marry off their daughters/sisters because then they will take their share of the wealth and property to their susraal. They get them married to Quran instead. So what do these girls do? They run away.
