How does one do this?
Hate that has been built up over a number of years and seems to increase each time the hate giver decides they are bored and wish to distribute some more pain in order to increase the hate..
I was thinking along the lines of acceptance. As in accepting the hate, yet I cannot bring myself to accept it as I know it’s wrong.
It’s such a kerfuffle this hate lark.
Re: Getting rid of hate
MnM, the way i look at hate is prolly diff. then others.
Hate=Difference of opinions.
Try to understand what the diff. is in the parties opinions and how you can solve the problem.
Re: Getting rid of hate
I love you too Miss Mohabbat. Your icon is so colorful. 
Re: Getting rid of hate
aww wat do u mean? this individual makes you hate urself or them? either way its an awfully evil thing to do.
Re: Getting rid of hate
This was actually meant to be a serious thread about seriously wanting to stop hating people regardless of how much pain they have caused you.
Not anyone is cyber world, in real life people, real bloody life!
PGC, did you make the gingerbread people?
Re: Getting rid of hate
Been there, done that. :)
Well, i guess, feeling of hatred is natural. But once u know that in Islamic terms, you are supposed to love or hate someone for the sake of Allah, u leave the personal issues behind. And its a better option to forgive the others and leave the case for Allah to decide. Dont interact with the person, u dont like, much. Just stay clear in ur mind about whats right and whats wrong. Hatred is left behind, then u start to feel sorry for that soul. And yes, sometimes you pray to Allah to show the other person the right path. Because you cant get in their minds, Allah can.
Re: Getting rid of hate
practise meditation. Buddhist calming techniques can allow you to focus on the person that is generating hate and overcome it.
Re: Getting rid of hate
I don't think that hate per se should necessarily be thought of as an embarrassing emotion to have. In some cases, hate plays a crucial role in stopping, say, a hateful person from dishing out further distress to you or your loved ones to the point of overkill.
Hate and anger will kick in, as quite appropriate responses, in many cases where, to give some examples, someone has unreasonably blocked your rise in the social ladder, you've suffered a slide in status, a friend has betrayed you, you've been threatened with violence, you've been subjected to malicious gossip, your partner has rejected you, a child you love dearly is killed by a madman etc. But it's crucial to distinguish clearly between those cases where a wrong has been unjustifiably committed against you vs. an action where it was, perhaps, justifiable. It's not always easy - shades of grey will doubtless exist in some instances. Moreover, different groups of people will argue differently about what's justifiable or not.
Still, it is quite possible, with a good measure of learning and strength, to ensure we let hatred run its natural course in cases only where a wrong against us has definitely been committed, rather than it spilling over into unreasonable anger at anything and everything. Rather than a world where hatred is eliminated altogether, the best scenario would be where everyone consistently tries to go out of their way to reduce unfounded applications of its reach.
Re: Getting rid of hate
Its hard, I go through the same thing sigh
Re: Getting rid of hate
For me, letting go of what ever is causing me to feel hate is the way to get past it.
Hate is ultimately a feeling and you wouldn’t have these feelings if a part of you didn’t ‘care’ about the other person. In order to get past the hate, you basically have to let go and stop caring. Once you get to that point, you will be able to look at things objectively and resume your relationship with the other person from a more balanced perspective, meaning not being clouded by feelings of hatred since those feelings will no longer be there.
I think it is possible. Letting go is what is the most difficult aspect of all of this.
I hope that makes sense. 
Re: Getting rid of hate
There is nothing wrong with the emotion called hate, too much of the opposite ie "love" is sickening
you have to have the right balance in life
like yin and yang...you cant go wrong with steady balance of yin and yang.... it says so here in my feng Shui for beginners handbook.
Hate in its pure and unadulterated form has done a great service to the human race, its made them get up and go do things
you hated living in caves...you got up and built a house
you hated walking...you made a wheel
yeah yeah....it may not entirely be correct,
but anyway what im trying to say is that the idea of disliking "hate" is SOOO, erm... I dunno
It smacks of Do-gooder
and I hate Do gooders... they ruin everything for everyone!
Re: Getting rid of hate
which one is yin and which one is yang. i have more of one than the other
Re: Getting rid of hate
Heaven was created by the concentration of Yang, the force of light,
earth was created by the concentration of Yin, the forces of darkness. Yang stands for peace and serenity; Yin stands for confusion and turmoil. Yang stands for destruction; Yin stands for conservation. Yang brings about disintegration; Yin gives shape to things....
you need and element of both to work together to create harmony
Re: Getting rid of hate
Hatemongers thrive on the response they derive. Stop giving them that response. Treat them with sickly sweetness......feign it if you have to.......and perhaps they may stop being so offensive.
I deal with someone that has hate and bitterness built up inside. It's a very difficult thing to do. I feel for you.
Re: Getting rid of hate
Sadaf, I cannot possibly forgive until I have gotton rid of the hate, but yes it is natural.
wunderkind, Meditation would require me to sit still and not speak. That is near enough impossible!
Mr Darwin, I am not embarrassed to hate, it has consumed me so to speak. I don't wish to hate, yet it seems to override any other feeling I could possible have towards the hategiver. Hating the person does not stop them from dishing the pain out, not in my case anyway. I think mine is a case of unjustifiable pain. I have yet to find a justification anyway, and trust me I have tried!
MehnazQ, letting go is exaclty what I need to do, but it is rather hard when I have so much hate. It's like a cycle. I feel I need to get rid of the hate first and then let go. As is not give the hategiver the pleasure in knowing they have caused pain. Urgh
lazy_daisy, I had a ying/yang necklace one, but lost it. I suppose your trying to say that this hate will allow me to move on?
Muzna, Sickly sweetness does not work with what the hategiver does. I'v compromised more than enough. Turns out im not the "bigger" person I once thought that I could be.
ThankYou everybody for your input, definately some thoughts to mull over.
Re: Getting rid of hate
get them voodoo doll things. Either that or baking.
Re: Getting rid of hate
Intense hate is seen usually with people you love the most!
In this case try this:To the victim be disgusting, be repugnant, use aversion language and detest
(--interlude--) ...It will let your anger go off and will make you feel better n relaxed for a while, after some time you will start feeling guilty for what you did…
(--interlude--) ...Now a soft corner is building! Use it and get closer, don’t forget to say sorry!
In other case pay no attention or else see a psychologist asap!
Re: Getting rid of hate
so i know why you avoid me…
Re: Getting rid of hate
I dont avoid you
You know how the brits love the french
Re: Getting rid of hate
Nope. I bought cookies instead.