Gentleman

[Naabigh]

Re: Gentleman

Jamati - no wonder she is

[Xtron]

Re: Gentleman

Yes she is in Canada..my best buddy’s mom used to know Farhat Hashmi. I believe..she lives in Mississauga here. Khair..my buddy’s mom was saying…that some Canadian secret agency has been spying on her. Since then..she is not that much in public nowadays.

[queer]

Re: Gentleman

if you do believe in god and religion as the truth, then isn’t someone being religious a good thing?

pcg you should have your brother cuz thank his wife for helping him find his way into heaven and all the awesome stuff in there.

[Aish]

Re: Gentleman

If I were a man I would encourage my wife to be religious. I wouldn’t want a high maintenance wife, they are just too hard to keep up with.

I would have no issue with it.

[Captain_Obvious]

Re: Gentleman

@PyariCgudia

Let’s say your wife gets WAY more religious. She changes her clothing, drops her job because she says women who sit at home are more closer to God, stops doing her hair and going out to nice dawats for you, starts wearing niqaab, you can’t even see her face in public when you go out with her.

My wife already wears niqab, doesn’t work (never has for that matter). Under the abaya she stills wears regular clothes and does her hair. She’s never had an issue with going to nice dawats.

And now let’s say all this change happens, and she tells you - who doesn’t have a beard: you need to grow a beard.

Already have one. Weren’t you saying in another thread how it’s a husband’s fardh to be attractive for his wife? So what’s the issue with this then?

She starts believing that pictures are haraam, and throws out your camera and you’re now not allowed to take pictures of your own kids. You figure out ways to sneak in pics using the camera on your iphone, and she finds out you do that, and she gets into an argument with you and tells you she told you not to take pics of the kids.

Not sure what I’d do there.

She asks you that every year when you save up for a family vacation, you guys have to go to Saudi for Umrah. You say, how about Paris this time? She says absolutely not, it’s a haraam city, you guys have to go to Saudi instead. So you begin to look for ways to travel through work to keep up with your hobby of seeing the world.

When you met her, she wore regular fashionable shalwaar kameez, had her hair done nicely, make-up on, etc. And now she just wears burqa and niqaab when she goes out, because she took some religious classes and got inspired by the clothing of her teachers, and so she believes this is the right Islamic way to do things.

When you go for jumma, she notices your shalwaar, and asks you to hike it up, so your ankles show.

How would you deal with this?

By the way, this is not hypthetical. My cousin did this to her husband. She pulled all these changes on him immediately after the marriage. She had become religious prior to the marriage, but decided to hide all this so she could continue on with the marriage. Then after marriage, she changed completely. She was inspired by classes by Farhat Hashmi.

She doesn’t let her husband take pics of her kids. In fact, I’m not allowed to take pics of my niece and nephew. I once did secretly, and she pulled me aside and made me give up the picture.

As for the rest of the stuff, I’m not sure. I’m no fan of Farhat Hashmi, but she does have quite a following amongst people in our city. They’re nothing like what you’ve just described. Still, if she became difficult due to following Farhat Hashmi, I’d just tell her to follow someone who knows what they’re talking about.

[PyariCgudia]

Re: Gentleman

^ Yeah but you were probably aware of what you were marrying, and you’re on the religious side yourself, so it’s compatible. Imagine a guy who had no clue about these kinds of “Islamic” ideas, and marries a girl, and she does a 360 after marriage. Isn’t that wrong?

But it’s not wrong when a guy does that to his wife, though.

[queer]

Re: Gentleman

360?

i think you mean 180, pcg pai. unless you are all about radians.

[Captain_Obvious]

Re: Gentleman

360? That means no net change. Anyhow, I’ve seen it happen the other way as well. I know of some cases where the guy knew that the girl had a certain level of practice then he pressured her to give up some things once married.

[Geezer]

Re: Gentleman

I won’t have that kind of idiot wife in the first place.

[PyariCgudia]

Re: Gentleman

Well I guess we learned something new. Find out where she received her religious education, and maybe even ask her the kinds of books on Islam she is reading or the seminars she is going to.

[ButtSb]

Re: Gentleman

Whats your problem if other adult women make a decision to follow someone??

[SaeedinPakistan]

Re: Gentleman

@PyariCgudia

^ Yeah but you were probably aware of what you were marrying, and you’re on the religious side yourself, so it’s compatible. Imagine a guy who had no clue about these kinds of “Islamic” ideas, and marries a girl, and she does a 360 after marriage. Isn’t that wrong?

But it’s not wrong when a guy does that to his wife, though.

On the flip side. What do you do if your wife switches from wearing regular shalwar kamiz to strapless sundresses? All in the name of modernizing. And starts doing whatever those madren women do.

That’d be a whole different kind of mess.

[Captain_Obvious]

Re: Gentleman

@PyariCgudia

Well I guess we learned something new. Find out where she received her religious education, and maybe even ask her the kinds of books on Islam she is reading or the seminars she is going to.

Yeah, that’s definitely something I would suggest looking into. Even among the people labelled religious, there can be significant differences.

[madz124]

Re: Gentleman

Ok I did some research. My aunt (in New Jersey) listens to dars by Ustazah Najiha Hashmi. The show is called Aaj ki Naiki. Does anyone know if Najiha Hashmi is related to Farhat Hashmi?

[PyariCgudia]

Re: Gentleman

Not sure, but Farhat is one of 4 sisters, and now they’re all doing this, and Farhat’s son has his own TV show now.