Nad,
I think you and your husband's planning is very sensible, as having children means having a big responsiblity of taking good care of family. And as you mentioned that both of you are studying, it is understandable it will be a little hard to manage with having kids. Also financial situation is to be considered before having children and I think you and your husband have considered that.
Just let your in-laws know of such things, both of yours studies, current lifestyle, and financial status (incase this is a concern) and tell them it may be a little hard to have kids at this point, and that you do plan to try a little later.
Never say that u don't want at this point. I knw two family (our neighbour) who said the same thing we don't want at this point. they are married 26 years ago and still they don't have any single child.
The second family had one child at then thy said we don't want now we'll take a break. Now the kidz is 8 years old and they r trying for 2nd 1 but nothing happen.
Always pray to Allah SWT! for betterness, if He bless u in this age (at this time) or a later on u couple should be thankful to Him and seek always well-wishes for your kidz.
moreover, Allah SWT! jis ko dena chahy to be-hisaab deta hay or jisay nahi to phir kuch bhi nahi.
Lethal, your post didn't help her in any way and instead scared her. Please don't say that people who don't try at some point won't have kids if they try later. People have or do not have kids by Allah's wills only. It is not that they will have kids if they try at some point, and will most likely not have kids if they try later. If Allah wills and wishes for someone to* have* children, they* will* have children no matter when they try. And if Allah wills and wishes for someone not to have children, they won't have children no matter when they try and how much they try. Next time, please be careful of what you say.
that scares me.. we both love babies . my mom says the same thing that if we use any type of birth control then we might have complications in future. but i don't completely agree with it. everyone uses it these .
Don't use birth control stuff. Many of them are not safe.
lethal kamikaze is correct. I personally know two couples who decided not to have baby for few year (saying they want to enjoy first)......and they still don't have one for over 20 years....
One wife committed suicide.....the other couple regrets it and keeps crying....
A word of advice: never stop your first two kids. do planning from third.
I have been married for 8 months now. I am 19 at this point and my hubby’s 22, plus he is my cousin. He came from Pakistan and is still struggling to get admission in a good uni. I am also a college student. We are happily married but the issue is that both mine and his parents are pressurizing us to have a baby which we don’t want at this point. My hubby is the only son in his family therefore his parents are eagerly waiting to see their grandchild, and they won't listen. My father-in-law gets angry with my hubby every time he brings this topic up. We are living with my parents for now since my hubby’s new to the place...he doesn’t have a driver’s license, and can’t afford to live separately because he is the only one working. I really don’t know what to do right now, what should i do? any suggestions?
what the first poster said. Say you are trying, its not happening, aap loug duaa karain. simple.
^Oh I know it, Deebs. LOL, this is all just so ridiculous that I find it somewhat funny. For the guy’s dad to get “angry” about there being no baby yet. Yes, there are 2 sides to a story and maybe he wasn’t angry and the OP perceives it as such. The husband is young, they’re not financially secure…these demands (let alone having a baby) can put a lot of strain on the couple’s relationship. I understand that maybe they feel that they won’t live long enough…and want to see a grandchild…but it ultimately depends upon Allah. And she brought up that the pressure is due to her husband being the only son in his family…and in this case, I hope they won’t throw a cow if the first child (whenever it’s born) turns out to be a girl.
lethal kamikaze is correct. I personally know two couples who decided not to have baby for few year (saying they want to enjoy first)......and they still don't have one for over 20 years....
One wife committed suicide.....the other couple regrets it and keeps crying....
A word of advice: never stop your first two kids. do planning from third.
Please don't write such stuff here. Saying this is not helping the post-maker or any of us in anyway. Having or not having kids only happens by Allah's will.
lethal kamikaze is correct. I personally know two couples who decided not to have baby for few year (saying they want to enjoy first)......and they still don't have one for over 20 years....
One wife committed suicide.....the other couple regrets it and keeps crying....
A word of advice: never stop your first two kids. do planning from third.
Just don't have it and tell the parents we are trying.
Just tell them Dua KaraiN
Yup.
Don't bring a child into the world until you are prepared to devote yourself to her/him. But also don't get into some big discussion about it. They won't agree with you. It's not worth it.
If you have strong faith in Allah, then let the first kid come.....Allah has the responsibility of kids and luck changes with them......Betian bais-e-rehmat hain....halat insan kay behtar hotay hain.....
