salam,
i read the whole of the thread and would like to share an experience. i knew a family where the husband is an engineer at a well-to-do position, a relegious one who very skillyfully handles shariah whenever he finds an occassion, he got married to an educated and groomed girl of a respectable family(self-made). his family was also educated i.e., doctors, bankers etc. the boy had a rude nature as these were his family remarks as well. he got to be a psucho as his family atmosphere used to be the one where parents used to fight and there used to be everybody's own atmosphere. he was the only educated amongst his siblings. the girl adjusted in his family in such a way that each family member went a fan of her. the boys' family knew that after a short while clashes are going to start and such happened. the girl's mother died after just four mnths of her marriage. this shattered her completely as she was pregnant as well.
but the boy played his role. the boy had issues at why the girl was sad all the time, it will have bad effects on his baby, why she wanted to be with her younger siblings, after all she should enjoy the new and a lot more. he was altogether a typical eastern man. the girl used to cry the whole nights, started skipping meals and got hospitalized as well but the husband used to torture her by saying bad abt her family. he even threatened her of divorce wen he got a job at a foreign land.
recently wen he has his wife with him as after all the girl is livind with him bcoz of the child and the society, he still teases through various ways such as few days back he demanded a 50% share in her salary if she has a job. i don't know why men don't place such terms before getting married? why don't they show the same attitude bfor marriage? this cud have been better for both of them and why parents do not openly tell abt their sons' attitude problems earlier inspite of later claiming that he used to b of the same sort wid us as well. spoiling a life and making a sane person psych patient can b of any use? kindly justify and cum up wid serious ways as i want to help the miserable person.